


Umbra Noctis

by DragonX



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Anxiety, Bad Decisions, Bad Puns, Blood and Gore, Character Death, Childhood Trauma, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Manipulation, Emotionally Repressed, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Female Chara (Undertale), Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Magic, Morally Ambiguous Character, Near Death Experiences, Past Sexual Abuse, Self-Harm, Slow Burn, Suicide Attempt, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-25
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:13:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 73,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21557575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DragonX/pseuds/DragonX
Summary: The last human falls. Umbra is the final human, destined to open the barrier to save monster-kind. She is unlike any other to fall. She is older, less kind, and could care less for the world. For when has the world cared for her?
Relationships: Papyrus & Sans (Undertale), Sans (Undertale)/Original Character(s)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 29





	1. Prologue

A woman's voice blared into my ear. It startled me for just a moment. My muscles screamed to life as my slumber was halted by Mrs. Faerlander's berating tone. I opened my eyes to see her from the whiteboard, scowling at me as if I insulted her. I gave her my usual dismissive shrug and wandered my eyes away from her in disinterest. She sighed in defeat and continued teaching the kids that actually cared about Trigonometry.

Highschool was a chore. Boring lessons that seemed so important to some at the time, they vehemently studied and let it control them. In reality, none of it would matter. Sure the grade was important to some high rated college that their parents would send them to, but the actual lessons were not useful in the slightest. Ebbot was a city that raised politicians and other high ranking socialites, these kids were most likely the spawn of some politician in the government, and if they disappointed daddy or mommy they would be disowned.

I internally chuckled at the thought of one of these kids sitting next to me in a puddle of tears and snot because they didn't make a 95 in Trigonometry and daddy would take away their new car or god forbid their phone.

When I was younger I would try my best to be nice to these kids, try to be kind and forgiving. Of course, such a naive thought was quickly stamped out.

_My ribs cracked as her foot kicked into my side. I coughed up blood as my internal organs were further damaged. I looked up and saw her face glinting with glee as she continued her blows._

_"You fucking bitch, how dare you speak to me! I'm fucking the daughter of Rodney Vynis and a fucking nobody orphan dares to embarrass me by speaking to me!_

_Her shrilly voice was imprinted into my memory as she rained down hell into me. I cried long after she left me to my suffering. I didn't understand, all I wanted was a friend._

The bell interrupted my thoughts, signaling the days end as I got up from my desk. Some kids glared at me, some moved as far away from me as possible. They hated me, hated that I was nobody, hated that I could not be manipulated and thrown away. These teenagers were the spawn of demons, the spawn of beings of hatred.

I left quickly as I could. It was not smart to be caught out by many at a time. An individual was a laughing matter, but a group of these fuckers could do some serious damage with no repercussions. I hurried along to the orphanage that was my home. The old building was falling apart, the government could care less for a place filled to the brim with useless, unproductive members of society. I went inside and ignored the squealing of the younger children as I entered my room.

The room was small, slightly larger than a parking space. Enough for a bed and a tiny end table. The bed itself was torn in many places and stained beyond repair. I sat down on the edge and mentally prepared myself for tomorrow. For I would turn 18.

The orphanage would kick me out after that point and leave me to the wolves. I had nowhere else to go, nowhere to live, and no people that cared enough to take me in. I sighed and rubbed my temples in thought. I looked up and to the mountain my window faced. The white snowcapped peak glinted in beauty, the trees on its sides waved in the slight breeze, their autumn leaves floating in the wind. Of course, it was an option.

My mind ran through the other options, no matter what I would be homeless unless I sold my body to some older man. I scowled as I thought over that option and quickly brushed it out of existence. Homeless in the city is much more dangerous than living on the mountain. Of course, the end result stays the same.

Die on the streets or die surrounded by beauty and the relief of loneliness. I smiled softly as my mind already made the decision.

I quickly gathered my few possessions, a small journal, two pens, plenty of snacks I stashed over the last few months, three plastic water bottles that I would fill in the bathroom, a book on traps I stole not too long ago, and finally my last two prized possessions. Two beautiful knives, one was on the larger side, about the length of the middle of my forearm to the tip of my middle finger, and the next was a pocket knife. I quickly admired the blades as an idea rushed into my head. Why continue? I could just end it now, not go through the trouble of surviving. I contemplated the thought for a few moments before banishing it. 

I packed the items into my backpack and quickly filled the water bottles up to the brim, not before taking large gulps of water myself. I then gathered the minuscule dinner the orphanage provides for us, eating it quickly as it would be the last free meal I would ever get. I took a deep breath as I exited the place that I was my home for the last 17 years and set off to the mountain.

* * *

I breathed heavily as I ascended the mountain. It took about two hours to get to the mountain base and I was three hours into the climb. My muscles screamed in agony but I bit down the pain and continued. The night was closing in and I needed to find shelter before my vision was useless. As I continued I listened to the eerily silence the mountain had. No birds sang, no animals dared to make noise. I huffed as I came to the conclusion that they perhaps did not exist on the mountain. The only thing that broke the silence was the breeze in the trees.

About thirty minutes later I found a small cave entrance. My eyes wandered around the area, trees were beginning the thin with how rocky it was and the lack of oxygen compared to the base of the mountain. I smiled as I walked up to the tiny cave, checking for snakes but found none. I explored the cave a little more, but it only went about 15 feet back. At the end, there was a hole. It had vines hanging down and above it was another hole, although much smaller. I looked over the edge and could not tell how deep it went, as it was too dark in the cave to tell. I shrugged as I went closer to the entrance to sit down and eat some of the snacks I had stashed.

I watched the sunset over the ocean, the waves glinted with a golden sheen as the crashed onto the beach. I watched as night descended and the city lights glowed far away. Exhaustion set in soon, my journey left my legs aching as my body started to heed sleep's call. I went over onto my side and faced towards the cave entrance. I grabbed my backpack and used it as a pillow. I looked to the moon, it's light almost blinding compared to the darkness that surrounded me. My eyes began to drift, allowing darkness to completely encompass me as I fell into sleep's embrace.

_I suddenly found myself oddly aware. Darkness surrounded me, seemingly endless in its expanse. Was this a dream? I tried to move my feet and they would not oblige. Soon I heard a child chuckling, a peal of odd laughter that left a sudden feeling of fear in me. I looked around as much as I could in my state and found nothing._

_"Over here..."_

_I quickly found myself face to face with a small child. Their smile was something no ordinary child would possess. It left a feeling of wrong as we contemplated each other. Their smile twisted into a sinister grin,_

_"Umbra, away from home... No, away from hell it would seem..."_

_I shuddered as my flight response screamed at me, but I could no nothing to satiate it._

_"Did you ever think you would end up in a much greater hell?"_

_Their face turned demonic as they reached for my chest, I did everything in my power to move but I could not. It was as if my body was taut with layers of rope. Their hand reached closer and as they were but an inch away from my chest my eyes opened and I jumped into action._

I screamed as my flight response kicked into high gear, a pair of red eyes glinted at me from the cave's entrance. I grabbed my backpack and edged towards the cave's end, never taking my eyes off the sinister red eyes that bore into me. Soon, the ground vanished from under me, I instinctively tried to grab onto the edges of the hole but I was far too late. The sensation of falling entered my gut as I tried to turn over so my limbs could take the brunt of the blow I was soon to encounter. I was falling too far, there was no way I could survive this. I closed my eyes as I prepared for my death, I knew it would come, but I didn't fathom it would be this soon. I exhaled and smiled at the thought of this cruel world finally coming to an end. I momentarily felt the impact but darkness swiftly embraced me so I would not feel the pain of death.

I would soon find out the world was not so kind to free me just yet.


	2. Awakening

I opened my eyes to glaring sunlight high above me.

_"Where the fuck am I?"_

I began to sit up when my chest and right arm gave me the familiar sensation of broken bones. I screamed softly at the pain as the memories of last night faded back. I quickly looked to see if any danger was around. Nothing presented itself but I pulled out my knife and set it beside me. My right arm was most definitely broken, my forearm twisted to the left ever so slightly. My ribs hurt but I figured they were just bruised. I frowned and looked for anything that could help bind my arm up for now. It was then I noticed I was on a large bed of golden flowers.

_"So that is how I survived."_

I chuckled at the insanity of my survival and grit my teeth as I stood up and grabbed my knife. I struggled slightly before staggering forward off the bed of flowers.

"F-Fuck." I cried out.

It hurt to breath and with each movement my right arm felt like I was cutting it off with a dull knife. I stumbled towards a doorway, the room becoming darker the further away I went from the sunlight. I emerged in a new room, dimly lit in the middle.

"Howdy!" said a overly cheerful voice.

I looked down and saw another golden flower, but this time it had a face.

"What the hell..." I stepped back from the flower, and held my knife defensively.

"Golly! You must be so confused." He eyed my knife, "Oh, you don't need that! Everyone down here is friendly!"

His overt cheerfulness immediately put me on edge, there was something inherently wrong with him.

"What are you?" I asked.

"Why, I'm a monster!" He then looked me over, "Oh my! Your arm, here let me help you!"

I then felt this awful tugging sensation, it felt _wrong._ I looked ahead and saw a comical heart shape in front of me. For the most part it was red, but there was some light blue undertones that you could barely tell was there. If you looked close you could see cracks on the surface. His voice then snapped me out of my thoughts,

"This is your soul, the very culmination of your being!"

"Wait, so this is my soul? This is a joke right? Souls are just a concept." Even as I said these words, I somehow knew I was wrong. When I stared into what seemed like my soul I could see myself. My faults, my personality, my dreams. So what did the cracks represent? I looked back up to the flower and saw that his face betrayed his annoyance.

"Well I wouldn't lie to you! Anyways, I can help your arm with friendliness pellets!"

My gut told me that I shouldn't trust this guy, the air around him felt thick with deceit. I tried my best to move around the pellets but one scraped past my left thigh. I screamed in pain, it wasn't in my thigh but in my chest. It felt like someone stabbed my heart. I looked to my soul and saw that it was quivering.

"You fool! In this world, it's kill or be killed!"

He then began to laugh maniacally as he surrounded the area with pellets. I quickly stood and began to run towards him with my knife drawn.

**Kill him.**

I faltered and missed him. I shook off my surprise at the voice in my head and looked to where he went. He appeared at the far edge of the room near the exit.

"Pathetic!" He screamed.

He unleashed vines on me, I rolled to the side and dodged them. He scowled as he prepared for another attack, but suddenly he was thrown into the darkness of the room by a ball of fire. I attempted to stand my ground to the newcomer but found that I could barely move. The culmination of my soul returned to the center of my chest when the newcomer began to speak,

"How awful, torturing such poor innocent youth." Her voice was feminine, but her body was something I've never seen. It resembled what seemed like a humanoid female goat. My vision dimmed as she began to speak to me,

"Are you alright dear?"

She began to approach me but she could be just like the flower. Although she did not have the air of malice the other gave, but better to be safe than sorry.

I held up my knife and tried my best to sound intimidating,

"No closer! Tell me your name and what is it you want."

My vision flickered and I knew my speech was beginning to slur, those pellets hurt my soul but where they struck still bled.

The goat woman looked at me with concern but did not approach further,

"My name is Toriel, I am the caretaker of the Ruins. I come to this place every day to see if a human falls and to make sure they are safe."

She did not seem to lie in any way. Her breathing was as natural as it could be in the situation, and her eyes held a steady gaze with my own. I nodded and lowered my knife slightly,

"My name is Umbra. Honestly, I am not sure if i'm alive still. What has happened since I fell makes no sense." It was then that I staggered to my knees and dropped my knife. Toriel gasped as she began to step forward,

"Child let me help you!"

The edges of my vision dimmed as she ran towards me. I could not move anymore as the world swirled before me. I could only hope that this monster would show me mercy as darkness swallowed me.

* * *

_My dreams were either terrifying or confusing. It would switch constantly between the horrors of the red eye'd demon and the maniacal flower, or show me faint memories of a past I did not know. The tastes of butterscotch and most peculiar the taste of snail. The feeling of fur as I rough housed with another figure. However, the fleeting moments of these somewhat innocent dreams would be quickly replaced of a demonic child tearing out my soul and eating it, or by the flower sending vines under my skin to torture me. It was a confusing cycle, one of torture and innocence that quickly swirled around until the difference was almost lost on me._

_"Wake up!"_

_The voice pierced into a rather grotesque version of myself being eaten alive and replaced the image with one of pure darkness._

_"Wake up? No this is hell, there is no escape surely?" I spoke into the darkness._

_"Umbra, wake up! Bring yourself back to the world."_

_As the words were spoken everything swirled into non-existence as I was brought back to reality._

I gasped as I sat up from the bed I was laying on. Instantly, the soreness of healing bones and skin pierced into my consciousness and I groaned in dissatisfaction. However, as I looked to the right I saw the familiar presence of the goat woman, Toriel.

"Hello, my child. I am glad you have returned to us, I feared that the fever would take you."

She smiled at me, clearly happy with myself living. I quickly checked over the environment around me, it was a room that was decorated to the liking's a child would have.

"Why did you save me, Toriel?"

I was genuinely curious, why would someone save me when they do not know me. Clearly, she seeks to gain something from me, however, as I asked her face filled with confusion,

"My child, you were injured and lost, how could I turn away when someone so clearly needs my help."

I returned her look of confusion. Of course she could be lying, but something was different about her. The way she talked, the way she looked at me, these movements and features were not ones someone of malicious or manipulative intent would have.

"I see, how long was I out for?"

"Two and a half days my child. Your condition worsened after you passed out, but I was able to heal you during that time.

"Can you tell me about this place?" I asked her.

"Of course, this is the Underground. Monsters were driven from this place hundreds, perhaps thousands of years ago by human mages who were scared of what we were. We are a mostly peaceful race. We are made of magic, unlike humans who are made of organic material.

I pondered over her sentence. Magic existed? I doubted the claim immediately but was quickly shut down by my broken arm being almost completely healed and my ribs just sore. There was no way any normal means of medical practice could heal me so quickly, however, I guess I should confirm it just in case,

"May I see some form of this magic?"

She chuckled softly as she raised her paw and a ball of fire then flared from her palm. Now, I may be mature and somewhat uninterested in the world, but I was just shown magic. The childlike wonder immediately took over. I could feel my eyes widening and my mouth part as the flames licked across her palm.

"How?" was my simple response.

She laughed once again and banished the magic from where it came,

"Magic comes from the soul, my child. Your soul possesses power and draws from magic to manifest itself. Beings of magic have an easier time summoning magic because we are made of it. We are already experienced in its workings because, in a way, we are magic. I've noticed most of the humans who fall have never seen magic and it only exists in tales. It seems that as the world has progressed above, you are less reliant on magic.

I hummed in understanding. Magic was real, I always read books where the forefront of the story is held by magic. A fantasy world much different from my own was much more appealing.

"Let me ask you some questions child. How old are you for one? You seem to be the oldest to fall."

"I'm 18 as of a few days ago. How many humans have fallen before?"

"You are the eighth to fall. I believe the youngest was eight and the oldest was fourteen before yourself."

She sighed as she continued,

"Since you are technically an adult, I'll share some details with you that I never shared with the other humans." She paused, seemingly to gather her thoughts, "There is a barrier that keeps us here, eight human mages sealed us within the Underground, it is believed with eight human souls we can destroy the barrier and reunite with your world. Long ago, the first child fell." She paused again, this time I heard her voice hitch with sadness as she continued her tale, "The royalty of the Underground took in the child and treated them as their own. The royalty's son got along great and soon they became like siblings. One day, the child grew ill. They consumed poisonous flowers and there was nothing anyone could do. When the child died, the prince took their soul and combined themselves into one. He passed through the barrier and when he returned he was injured beyond saving. It was only moments after he passed through the barrier he died as well."

I stayed silent, not knowing what to say. It was obvious Toriel had some strong feelings about the situation. However, one question remained in my mind.

"What happened to the other children that fell?" I asked.

Her expression turned even sadder, I could see tears prickling her eyes.

"Ah, that is the most important part, because it involves your safety. Asgore, the king of the Underground, vowed from that day forward to capture any human that fell and take their souls from them. After the prince's and the human child's death the Underground with distraught with grief and hopelessness. He produced such a law so that we could exit the Underground faster, I detested such a proposal immediately and resigned myself to exile within the Ruins."

"So, this Asgore will try to kill me? That is what happened to the other children is it not?" I confirmed with her. She nodded her head in affirmation and I could see tears fall onto her furred cheeks.

"They always wanted to move on, to try and go back home. How could I deny them, they never desired to stay?"

I thought for a moment. It seemed that the Ruins were a place that Asgore had no sight over, I could stay here and be safe if Toriel did not mind. It was the safest option by far and would allow me to learn more about this place.

Yet, I even knew then I would not stay forever, this world was so unlike mine that my curiosity was once again ignited from its dormancy. The days where I would stay up all night studying scientific discoveries, researching why we lived and how. and learning the human psyche. However, as the world spat and humiliated me, beat me into confinement, I lost interest in much of everything. The singular spark in the dark ignited a fire that burned bright, illuminating the dark recesses of my mind that once housed wonder, discovery, and interest.

I ghosted a smile across my face, "Toriel, if you would have me, I would like to live and learn with you for the time being."

Her face brightened, her sadness fell and was replaced with joy.

"Of course, you may stay for as long as you like!"

I flinched as she placed her paw on my thigh, kindness such as this was not something I was experienced in.

"I-I... thank you, Toriel."

She then went to her knees and hugged me, the scent of butterscotch and cinnamon entered me. Her fur was soft and felt amazing. Yet, the most wonderful feeling was one I had never felt before. A hug was something I was almost never given. Some of the orphanage children would hug me, but they soon avoided me when I never returned it. It was encompassing, forgiving, loving even. I could not fathom how she could express these feelings towards me after only knowing me for a few days. Was she naive? Yet, even then I knew I would not harm her, she presented no harm to me. She healed me, took care of me, fed me, and housed me. So, very carefully and with uncertainty, I returned her hug.

_I fell, my legs still wobbly from learning to walk. I landed pretty hard on my hip, making me start to cry. The scent of an old book's pages and the warmth of love surrounded me. Their voice lilted with soft praise and concern for my injuries. In this warmth they provided I felt safe, I felt loved and cared for._

I did not notice how I pressed harder into the hug during the flashback. I missed whoever that person was, and Toriel's hug ignited the memory.

Soon, the hug ended. Toriel looked at me and asked,

"Do you want some pie, my child?"


	3. Cryonix

Days flew into weeks, and weeks into months. Toriel taught me as much as she could, how to fight monsters, to talk to them instead of killing them. To show mercy.

"Your HP, or HoPe is how many attacks your soul can take before shattering. It is imperative that you never reach zero because you will lose your life. 

She paused in her lesson, 

"Your LoVe, or Level of Violence measures how capable you are of killing another living soul. Your EXP or Execution Points is how much you have hurt another. Please refrain from killing another, because the more you do the easier it becomes to kill. The more you distance yourself from their agony and distress." She explained.

"There was one child that fell, his soul was filled with bravery. He was the hardest to teach that killing others was not a good path, that it would lead to corruption and destruction. I feel as if I did not teach him enough or force the idea stronger into him as he was the quickest to continue on." 

Toriel paused. Seemingly gathering the courage to continue, 

"Umbra, I feel as if you are already distanced from others suffering. From my observations you care not to speak to the other monsters, and when they fight you are not afraid to damage them into mercy. Tell me why, my child." 

My eyes narrowed softly as I took what she said into consideration. I sighed and began to answer her, 

"I'm not one to talk much, I am simply used to the silence. As for why I damage them directly and not Act is because to me it is the quickest and simplest option." 

I could immediately tell she was displeased with my answer. I internally chuckled at the naivety and pure kindness she had for others. However, I always wondered why she was displeased. The monsters in the ruins would attack me with no hesitation, damaging my soul and body. Why was I limited to just Acting and not returning in the same fashion? Of course, I don't kill them, but I learned the hard way that hurting others was the quickest option for them to leave you alone.

_The crisp winter air stung my cheeks as I walked back to the orphanage. The night was beginning to peek its way on the horizon, making the sky a beautiful orange on one side and a midnight blue on the other. The snow crunched under my feet and the lighting made it sparkle with a golden tinge. I would have stopped to admire such beauty if I was not ripe with paranoia. I heard rumors of a girl wishing me harm, that she wanted to teach me a lesson. Apparently it was due to the fact my hair stayed straight while hers required hours of maintenance every day to straighten. Such a petty reason was of course in no way an actual reason to want to harm someone but they, of course, viewed it as an absolute reason to want to harm me. I took a longer way to the orphanage, to the abandoned ghetto area so that if she did come to me no one would be around. It worked out in both of our favors, to be honest. No one would be able to get the police involved, and no one would witness her humiliation._

_A pair of footsteps roused me from my musings, I quickly turned to see the girl, Amanda I believe, walking towards me with a look that was a mixture of rage and smugness._

_"Hey bitch!" She called out._

_I looked at her with disinterest, knowing full well that whatever she intended she was not physically or mentally strong enough to bring me any real harm._

_"Yes, Amanda?"_

_Her arms still had baby-fat, not indicating that she worked out. Her legs were skinny, barely any muscle was on them. Her expensive winter clothing shielded her from the cold much better than I but they were fleece and long, allowing me to grip her if necessary. The only thing she had on me was height but I could tell that with one good hit she wouldn't be able to fight._

_"Stupid bitch, how dare you fucking have better hair than me!"_

_It was then I noticed she held a knife in her hand. When she realized that I knew she carried a weapon her smile lit up with sinister glee._

_"I'm going to fuck up your face and hair with this, a stupid bitch like you needs neither!"_

_She ran towards me, laughing as she did. As she was almost about to hit me I twisted my way out of the knife and grabbed the arm which she held it. Her face then contorted into one of confusion. It quickly turned to fear as I pressed my other hand against her elbow and proceeded to break her arm._

_She dropped the knife immediately, its metallic tang piercing the air as it clattered to the ground. She then proceeded to scream as if she was dying. I immediately covered her mouth with my hand as I grabbed her knife from the ground. I calmly pressed the tip of the blade against her throat, looking her in the eyes._

_"Please, never try to do something like this again. You will fail, and I will do much worse than break your arm next time. Nod if you understand."_

_She nodded, still screaming into my hand. I quickly hit her head as hard as I could with the butt of the blade so she would become unconscious. I quickly looked around, checking to see if anyone saw our encounter. Of course, the street we were on was full of abandoned ghetto buildings so no one was around. I looked at her again, her face stained with tear tracks and snot. I huffed at her and proceeded to make my way back to the orphanage._

_Never again did she bother me. Every time we saw each other in school her face would light up with fear and would try her damnedest to avoid me._

Toriel's voice brought me out of my musings,

"I must implore that you try to be more kind to the monsters, a little kindness and empathy will do much for the soul."

I nodded my head in affirmation, clearly arguing with her will get me nowhere as she is set in her ways.

"Come, let us eat some lunch, my child."

We then got up from the ground and made our way to her house. She always insisted we study outside of the home, among the other inhabitants of the Ruins. I did not deny her simply because it matters not where I learn, as long as I learned it.

It took about 5 minutes to get back to her home. Every time we entered I felt like I lived here all my life. This home was a lot more warm and comforting than the orphanage. The feeling was welcome, and I would regret leaving it so soon, but I must continue otherwise my life would get rather boring.

We ate some cinnamon pie, I savored the deliciousness of the meal. All of the food in the Underground had a delicious quality that very few human foods had. I deduced it to the magical quality the ingredients down here had.

"My child, you have been more in thought today. What is it that has enraptured your mind so?"

I internally groaned in the knowledge that what I was about to tell her would insue an argument. I sighed before I answered her,

"I am thinking of leaving the Ruins soon."

Toriel's eyes widened in worry. She closed her eyes to steel herself before replying,

"Ah, I knew this day would come, for it always had before."

I then noticed the tears fall into her cheeks, I knew that she had an attachment to me, but I never knew that it would incite such an emotion.

"I cannot deny you from continuing, my child. I know that you are strong-willed, and are determined to see whatever it is you have in your mind done."

"Toriel, after me the children that fall will no longer be in danger from Asgore. No matter what happens to me, be it I die to them or I die from old age, you will be free."

"Ah, my child. Practical as ever. I do not desire to be free if it means that children must die. Children are the embodiment of innocence. How can we take that from the world to satiate our own selfish wills?"

Toriel paused, collecting her thoughts before continuing,

"Even though I know you are the oldest, wisest, and strongest to fall I fear your death be it close or far away. You, among all the other children to fall, I have always considered being my own children. Each time they leave it is as if my soul is being torn asunder because all I can hope is that the monsters after the Ruins give them a painless death."

Her tears quickened, leaving her shuddering and gasping as she cried from her own failures.

"Toriel, why did you let them leave?" I asked calmly.

Her bloodshot eyes widened, her cries stopped as she took in what I said.

"I-I always let them through because they were all determined to get back home, who am I to deny them the chance?" She answered quietly.

"Yet you just admitted that you hoped the monster's on the other side would give them a painless death, it was all you could hope for."

She was silent. The look of shock implanted on her face quickly turned to shame.

I did not tell her this out of spite or hatred. I wanted her to understand the consequences of her actions. She effectively killed 7 children by allowing them to continue on. Yes, it might be cruel to her now, to make her agonize over her actions. But in the end, it would ensure that the future children that fell would be safe until they turned of age.

"I-I know what you are trying to do, Umbra. I have hidden the truth under the guise of letting the children achieve their dreams of going home. I know I should have kept them here, ensure that they would be safe, but I did not. I will forever feel the guilt of my actions until the day I turn to dust. Thank you, for letting me see it, my child."

_"That went better than expected..."_

"Then I shouldn't have to tell you that if any other children fall during the time that monsters are stuck underground that you should keep them safe until they are old enough to take care of themselves?"

Toriel nodded in confirmation. I allowed the tension to release from my shoulders as I lifted my hand cautiously to her paw.

It was an awkward yet gentle touch. She has done it plenty of times to me so maybe it would help her. Her face lit up as much as it could as she was still tearful.

"I want you to know, Toriel, that you have been the closest thing to a parent that I have ever had. You have cared for me, guided me, and taught me much in the last two months. For that, I thank you and wish that if another child falls, they are much better than I am at expressing what you have for me."

I got up from the seat and went to grab my backpack as I already prepared the night before. When I returned, Toriel's tears dried and she looked at me with a mixture of pride and sadness.

"Ah, you are leaving now. For some reason, I am not surprised you would leave suddenly after telling me." She laughed as she spoke, I am glad she was not offended by my actions.

She stood as well and closed the distanced between us. She hugged me gently. Even after two months, I was still uncomfortable with hugs. I did my best to mimic her actions before she stood back and smiled at me.

"Come, my child. I shall lead you to the door."

We entered the basement of the house. I followed her down the path, listening as she instructed me about the next area.

"The next area is Snowdin, it is freezing there so make sure you are warm. You will encounter new monsters and the Royal Guard. Make sure they do not know what you are, because they will kill or capture you with all their strength. Try to get to Snowdin Village, from there go to Waterfall. If you continue down the path you will eventually find yourself in New Home. There, Asgore lives."

I knew this information already, but allowed her to continue anyways. If it made her feel better then I could deal with it.

We arrived at the large door, she stopped and stared at the door.

"I hope this is the last time I have to see one of my children leave."

She turned to me and smiled sweetly.

"Stay safe, Umbra.... my child."

As if the door understood her words and intentions it opened slowly. It led into another dark room, although I could see a shaft of light in the middle.

"Follow the path, my child. It will lead you to Snowdin."

She placed her paws on my shoulders. I could see the turmoil in her eyes, screaming at her to stop but she knew that she could not. She then leaned down, hugging me one last time.

She looked me in the eyes one last time before stepping to the side, allowing me to pass uncontested.

I looked forward, not allowing myself to see her as I told her my goodbye,

"Goodbye, Mother."

The words were not true. They tasted like ash in my mouth as I walked forward. I wanted her to be my mother, to be that caring figure, yet I did not feel for her in that way. Gracious? Sure. But did I love her? I desperately wanted to.

I walked past the doorway, refusing to look back as I knew that would make me question my decision. Do I stay safe, or do I embrace danger?

I heard the door rumble as it began to close. I already made my choice long ago, now it became reality.

The door slammed shut, rumbling across the chasm as I continued through the next room. It was oddly reminiscent of the room after the golden flowers. As I approached the beam of light in the center, I saw the ground shift and immediately stiffened. It was then, Flowey appeared. I scowled and readied myself for an attack.

"You have such fire inside of you. Such a willing soul to violence and bloodshed, yet you don't partake? I'm sorry to say but I'm disappointed."

I huffed as I stared down the talking flora,

"Would that be interesting to you?" I said calmly.

He grinned the most sinister grin I have ever seen on a face,

"It would be a show!" He growled out.

"Then I must disappoint you, as I have no intentions of killing someone."

You could see the disappointment on his pale yellow face. He huffed as he turned away from me, "Bummer. I still have hope for you, Umbra. I'll be watching!"

He returned to the earth, leaving upturned dirt from where he was.

_"What a psychotic little fuck."_

**Should of killed him when I had the chance.**

I rubbed my forehead as I pondered over such a sinister thought.

I recovered quickly as I was reminded of what I had to do. I continued walking, checking once behind me to see if he remained, but I was met with no life. Just eerily silence.

I steeled myself as I walked up to the door, and push hard against the heavy structure.

It opened quite easily as I found myself stood in a beautiful snow white landscape.

I looked back once more, finding nothing I returned back to the chilly embrace of Snowdin, taking one step forward.

* * *

The snow crunched underneath me as I patrolled the area around the entrance to the Ruins. It was exhausting and made me _snow_ tired. I chuckled at my pun, I would have to tell that one to Papyrus later.

I shoved my hands into my jacket's pockets as I walked among the dark trees. Quietly enjoying the silence of the forest. It was then I heard the soft crunching of snow ahead of me. I stood stone still as I listened, confirming what I heard. I quickly took a shortcut closer to the entrance of the Ruins and found myself behind what seemed like a human. I think it's a female, the body structure would indicate that. She very forcefully tore herself through the thick snow. Her black hair swished with the effort, I noticed it was tinged with the white of snowflakes. It was then she avoided a stick on the ground, very carefully making sure that she did not break it. I chuckled internally at the joke I was about to pull. I quickly took a shortcut to the stick and broke it with my foot before quickly teleporting back to the dense forest. She turned around quickly, her legs moved to a more supportive stance easily as she prepared herself. I was at such an angle where I could not see her face, but the quickness and ease of which she prepared herself for an attack concerned me. She turned back around slowly, and continued down the path. I followed from the forest, watching her closely. As she neared the bridge I teleported behind her a ways back and made sure to keep her frozen in place with my magic. Of course, my joke needed a serious buildup before releasing itself. As I neared her, I noticed how much smaller she was than me, her head only reached to my shoulders. I grinned widely as I began,

"Human... Don't you know how to greet a new friend?" Turn around and shake my hand."

I let my magic dissipate as she turned around and did what I asked.

I almost howled in laughter as the woopie cushion let out the loudest fart noise. I steeled myself, letting the cushion run out of air.

As it ended, however, I was confused as to why she did not laugh. It was then I finally looked at her face. Her full lips did not smile, her white skin did not crinkle around her eyes with laughter, and her pale blue eyes portrayed simple disinterest. I could not help but see Chara's face in this human, the disinterest, the inhumane unwillingness to show joy. I feared if her corruption had already tainted this one.

But as she looked over me I noticed some life in her eyes, a mere curiosity towards me it would seem.

_"Thank the stars, she has not fully succumbed to the demon's influence."_

"You know, you are supposed to laugh, or emote at all really." I said in disappointment.

She sort of cocked her head, a small motion as a ghost of a smile dusted her lips.

_"Damn your a hard nut to crack."_

"Well, I'm Sans, Sans the Skeleton. What's your name?"

Her eyes widened ever so slightly at my voice, then a look of understanding dusted her features.

"Umbra."

Her voice. It was like a mirror image, reversed but the same. I hid under a chuckle, joking my way into obscurity. She was not obscure. It was then I understood her expression, because we both came to the same conclusion about the other.

"Well, Umbra. I feel like I stepped over the line, shadowing you."

I gave her a small wink. I noticed the right side of her lips twitch softly as her eyes kindled a small spark.

"Don't worry, Sans. The shadows suit you much better."

I internally chuckled at how much she could read.

"Well, allow me to shadow you more because we need to pass through this bridge to continue on.

I gestured to the bridge behind her as she turned to look at it.

"Did someone try to build a fence here or..."

I chuckled as my brother popped into my head.

"Yeah, my bro built this. He said that he didn't want to be rude to a human if they wanted to get by."

She turned back around and looked at me weirdly.

"Yeah, my brother may be a human hunting fanatic, but he wouldn't hurt a fly. He's too kind."

She tensed at the words human hunting, because of course she would.

"Don't worry. As long as you don't trousle our bones we won't turn ya in."

The tension never fully left her body but she relaxed slightly. I could still see the distrust in her eyes as she nodded in understanding.

_"Stars, you're a tense one." I mused internally._

I gestured towards the bridge yet again,

"Don't let me keep ya, if ya don't keep moving your bones are ganna start aching."

I winked at her again as I noticed the slightest, most subtle eyeroll imaginable as she turned back around and began walking over the bridge.

Immediately, my grin fell as I followed behind her.

_"What hurt you?"_

I notice her continue to shift her eyes around her surroundings, most noticeably back to me, watching me closely.

_"And will you hurt us?"_


	4. Brothers, Puns, and Stars

As I walked forward I kept shifting my eyes back to Sans. The casual air around him was well put together, but something in it faltered. I knew that for some reason, he had a reason to keep an eye on me. For some reason, he did not trust me either.

It was sort of annoying, the faux casualness. I wanted to ask questions about how his bones were held together even though some of them did not fully connect. How, even though there would be enough light to see the inside of his skull, it was pitch black. He was simply a lot more interesting than the other monsters, considering his anatomy was very close to an actual human. Of course, there was also the question as to why his voice chuckled a fake laughter, his bones sagged under his eyes like he lost sleep, and the disinterest in the world. 

The questions could wait, however, as I really needed to get to warmth as fast as possible.

"We might see my brother out here. He's been kind of down lately because no humans have fell and I would appreciate it if you could cheer him up a little by going along with his puzzles."

I turned around and looked at him quizzically.

"And what if he decides he wants to capture me and turn me into the people that would kill me without hesitation?"

Sans' eyes narrowed,

"I know my brother well, he knows that if he turns in a human they will disappear, and will most likely die. He's just so infatuated with the idea of becoming a famous royal guardsmen, even though he is not made for that type of job."

He was sincere enough, it seemed that he truly did not wish to harm me, even though he was very cautious of me. His brother, however, was another story. I did not know him, so maybe what Sans is saying is a complete lie and he is leading me to my death.

I turned back around and continued along the path. I heard his feet crunch on the ground as he followed me. I guess it didn't really matter in the end, because that magic he performed on me would overpower me in an instant.

It was sort of unsettling, that even though I have been hardened and trained by life, that these monsters born with magic could just obliterate my existence. Although at the same time, I could care less. There's nothing I could do, so why worry about it.

As we continued along the path I learn loud footsteps and laughter in the distance. I looked to Sans and he just pointed over to a dilapidated station, quietly saying,

"It's my brother, just hide and watch."

He winked at me and I rolled my eyes as I walked over to the station.

After about thirty seconds, a much taller and skinnier skeleton came into view. He wore what seemed like makeshift armor and had a flowing red scarf.

"Sup, bro?" Sans questioned.

"YOU KNOW WHAT 'SUP,' BROTHER."

I physically cringed at the booming nasally voice that Papyrus had.

"IT'S BEEN EIGHT DAYS AND YOU STILL HAVEN'T. RE-CALIBRATED. YOUR. PUZZLES."

The tension left my body, and the fear of meeting this royal guardsmen brother faded. This wasn't a hunter, a killer. This was a naive and kind person, similar to Toriel. Except way louder.

"YOU JUST HANG AROUND OUTSIDE YOUR STATION. WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING?!" Papyrus questioned.

"Staring at my station, it's pretty cool. Do you wanna look?"

The flutter of fear entered me as he said this. Was he trying to out me and convince Papyrus to turn me in?

"NO! I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THAT!" Papyrus stamped his feet on the ground in frustration. "WHAT IF A HUMAN COMES THROUGH HERE, I WANT TO BE READY!" He continued to stamp the ground as he ranted, "I WILL BE THE ONE! I MUST BE THE ONE! I WILL CAPTURE A HUMAN!"

Papyrus was very adamant about this capturing a human business. I doubted Sans because of how vigilant he was about the whole situation. He held capturing a human in high regard, like if he didn't do it he would miss out on some grand prize.

"THEN I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL GET ALL THE THINGS I UTTERLY DESERVE! RESPECT... RECOGNITION...I WILL FINALLY BE ABLE TO JOIN THE ROYAL GUARD! PEOPLE WILL ASK TO BE MY FRIEND! I WILL BATHE IN A SHOWER OF KISSES EVERY MORNING!"

That was when I completely understood Sans. This was an outcasted youth, a naive kind soul who simply just wanted to be known and recognized. To have friends. This soul could not be rude, harm, or kill any living thing. My shoulders grew lax as I saw a younger version of myself within him. Of course, I was not as flamboyant or wished for recognition in the same way, but all I wanted during my childhood was a friend. I felt pity for Papyrus, for the world was cruel and he may never get what he desires because of his kindness.

Sans hummed after Papyrus' escapade. Igniting another rampage from the taller skeleton,

"SANS YOU ARE NOT HELPING, YOU LAZYBONES!"

"ALL YOU DO IS SIT AND BOONDOGGLE, YOU GET LAZIER AND LAZIER BY THE DAY!"

I looked over to Sans to see if he took offense to such an accusation and saw that he was grinning ear to ear.

"Hey, take it easy. I've gotten a _ton_ of work done today. A _skeleton._

If rolling your eyes could emit sound, I would be louder than Papyrus right now.

"SANS!!" cried out Papyrus in exasperation.

"Oh come on, your smiling." Sans replied with laughter.

"I AM AND I HATE IT!"

Papyrus sighs in annoyance before continuing on with his anguishes,

"WHY DOES SOMEONE AS GREAT AS ME HAVE TO DO SO MUCH JUST TO GET SOME RECOGNITION."

Sans began to emit a cheeky smile, you could practically taste the mischievousness this man was about to pull.

"Wow... sounds like you're really working yourself... down to the _bone._

I resisted the urge to bang my head against the wood of the station.

"UGH! I WILL ATTEND TO MY PUZZLES"

Papyrus shared in my pain, and I for one am grateful at least someone sympathizes with me.

"AS FOR YOUR WORK? PUT A LITTLE MORE...."

No stop, please. Don't do it.

 _"BACKBONE_ INTO IT!"

As Papyrus ran off laughing maniacally in his achievement, I sat in disbelief, wonder, and anguish.

Perhaps the Ruins was the better option after all.

* * *

I watched my brother run off, the feeling of both pride and sadness filled me as I sighed. I looked over to the station and motioned for Umbra to come out. As she came out, I grinned cheekily. If looks could kill, she would of dusted me immediately.

"Not a fan of the S plus comedy, kid?" I questioned.

She failed to hide the small twitch of the corner of her lip,

"I'm fairly certain that particular type of humor is cruel and unusual punishment."

I held up my hands in defeat, although I knew I was slowly but surely cracking that rough exterior.

"Aw, give me _arrest_ kid, I'm just trying to make that permanent frown you glued on turn upside down."

She sighed in exasperation and pinched the bridge of her nose,

"You are the worst." She said simply.

I chuckled softly, _"Oh I could be your worst nightmare, trust me."_

We stood in silence for a moment, so I took the time to look her over more.

There was a small faint scar on the right side of her bottom lip, her hair was short only going as far as her chin, there were bags under her eyes which stood out under her extremely pale skin, her nails were bitten down to almost nothing, and lastly I noticed that her body was lightly toned with muscle and the only fat on her was on the lower half of her body. Overall, she would probably physically best a lot of people, of course, what is physical strength when you had magic.

"If you want to check me out at least get me some flowers."

Her face was deadpanned as she said her joke, and I almost didn't make it out as one because of it. An awkward few seconds went by before it hit me, and I started laughing.

_"There ya go, kid."_

"Damn, I did not know if you had it in you." I said breathlessly.

"I guess I'm just full of surprises."

She leaned against the station and closed her eyes.

We both stood in silence for a few minutes. Most of the humans that came through weren't so quiet, but then again she was a lot older than the others.

"Your brother, he seems naive." She said plainly.

I narrowed my eyes, taking some offense even though I knew it was true.

"Although, I admire the dedication he has to make friends. I never got that far."

I perked up slightly, she admired Papyrus? Although what caught my attention more was her admission.

"So what's your conclusion." I asked her. I needed to know the type of person she was.

She looked at me quizzically before looking off into the distance.

"When you guys go to the surface the world is going to chew him up and spit him out. His naivety and kindness will be his detriment in that cruel world. He needs to be taught that kindness is a virtue but others won't see it in such a way. You're his big brother, and I can already tell you have protected him and will continue to do so. That is what will save him."

I already knew what she said was true, I already knew the world would either kill him or his kindness, I already knew all these things. I know that the only way that neither of these things happen was to stay with Papyrus all the way, which is what would have happened anyway. But what surprised me was her voice. The seemingly emotionless void had a slight sadness. An understanding, and experience.

_"The world hurt you and to survive you killed your kindness."_

"So, not scared for me. Consider me, offended."

Then the unimaginable happened, she laughed. It was short, yet it made it all the more sweeter. It was like a bell, soothing yet jarring.

"Sans, you can't fool me."

Then, all of a sudden, the joyous smile disappeared and was replaced with a much darker one.

"A coin may have opposite sides but it's still one and the same."

I smiled back at her, enjoying our game.

"Are you trying to _compliment_ me, kid?"

She rolled her eyes and began to walk down the path, completely ignoring my pun. I chuckled softly and a sense of pride washed into me as I began to follow her.

* * *

Oh he was so very interesting. Never have I met someone like Sans. I wanted, no, needed to know why he was the way he was, both physically and mentally. The only downside was that I would have to listen to that abysmal humor, but no one is perfect.

As we walked down the path I saw something glittering in the snow. I stopped to ponder over it and suddenly remembered something. I saw a few of these in the Ruins, but I never wanted to interact or figure out what it was, I was more fixated on learning as much as I could from Toriel.

"What has you enraptured _snow._

"Hate you." I said to him before continuing,

"It's the glittering golden things, I saw a few of them before in the Ruins but I was always so busy. What are they?"

Sans was completely silent, and his eyes lost their lights. For some reason, this was more terrifying than the dream before I fell down the hole.

"Sans." I said strongly.

His eye lights came back and he looked at me quizzically,

"I have no idea what you're talking about I see nothing."

I frowned at the obvious lie but decided not to push it.

I leaned down and decided to pick it up. That was when I felt a familiar tugging sensation at my soul, for a moment it felt as if a small piece of it attached to the star before quickly going away.

"Kid, you okay?"

I looked at Sans for a moment and pondered if I actually was okay or if I just signed some contract with my soul. The look he gave me caught me out of my worries and made me somewhat confused. Did he look... afraid? Why would he lie about this in the first place? I narrowed my eyes at him before turning around and continuing on the path.

_"If your going to lie to me at least don't make it obvious"_

After a few moments I heard his footsteps follow mine and we continued down the path in complete silence.


	5. Complimentary Despair

I trailed behind Umbra a fair distance. She knew that I lied about that save point, yet all she did was look at me with only slight anger and continued on. No yelling, no fighting, not really anything. Usually, when people caught you in the act of lying they would call you out but this human... she just continued on.

Of course, that doesn't forgive the fact that I should have killed her when she said that she had not touched any other save points. She would have just died and the Underground would have its last human soul with no chance of anyone dying in the process. But I didn't do it. Even though she looked like she could give less of a shit about anyone, she doesn't seem the type to kill others unless she had no other choice.

I looked at her for a moment and noticed she was shivering. Of course, she was probably freezing to death in this weather. I walked slightly faster so I would catch up to her,

"Hey, kid. Do we need to stop so we can build a fire?"

She turned around and looked at me with a blank expression. It took a few moments before she started speaking,

"I thought I had to appease your brother with completing his puzzles." She said.

I simply blinked in response. _"Did she really want to do that?"_

It took me a few moments to give a proper response,

"Well you can't do it if you freeze to death." I replied.

She hummed softly in consideration. She looked up to the sky, well, ceiling and pondered for a moment.

"How does it snow? You have no way for the water cycle to take place. Unless you you somehow made your own. Yet that would require so many resources just for a cosmetic reason. It can't be for agricultural because you can't grow crops...

I simply stared at her, it felt like she was barely asking me and just asking herself and trying to come up with a reason.

"....Of course, Hotland is just using the magma from under the Earth and you create thermoelectric energy." She continued.

I stared at her and chuckled. She stopped her tangent and looked at me confused. I winked at her,

"It's magic." I answered her simply.

"Yeah, I know that but how?"

I sighed as I questioned how to answer her. Magic was a very complicated subject, especially to someone who is just figuring out it exists.

"Well... the mountain we are under is a large source of magic. It stockpiled over the years because no one was using it. Eventually, anomalies would happen when large amounts of magic concentrated in one area. The anomalies ranged from environmental or to creations of new types of monsters. One of the anomalies is the creation of snow on seemingly nothing. However, magic still follows the rules of science. Eventually, the source of magic will be completely redistributed through snow and, one day, it will stop."

She looked at me the whole time, nodding in understanding during my explanation.

"I guess it's comforting to know that magic still follows scientific rules."

"Why is that?" I asked.

"Because it means that to use magic it takes energy from your body, correct?"

I thought for a moment on how to answer,

"Yes, it does. If you use too much magic as a monster or human it will kill you but it's a little different for both. For example, humans are made of a small amount of magic and are mostly organic matter. So humans would have lower magic reserves than monsters and would rely mostly on their own bodies. Using too much magic as a human will eventually stop your heart. However, monsters are completely made of magic. They can use more magic before tiring and they have the ability to use magic from around them. From what I know, humans never achieved the ability."

She narrowed her eyes slightly as she took in what I said. That was when I noticed that she was shivering even harder.

 _"Fuck you stupid skeleton, stop getting distracted by science talk."_ I berated myself.

"Come on kid, we can talk more once you're not about to drop dead from hypothermia."

She looked at me and nodded her head,

"Promise?" she asked with a small smile on her face.

I winked at her,

"Of course, it's _snow_ problem."

* * *

It took about five minutes to gather some dry firewood. Fortunately for us, nothing really melts here so the wood doesn't really get too wet.

"Yeah, the temperature always stays at a solid fifteen degrees here, it never fluctuates because, you know, magic." Sans told me while wiggling his phalanges.

"Then how does the snow not stockpile to the ceiling of the cave?" I asked him.

His smile grew wider and I already knew the answer before he said it,

"Magic."

I sighed in annoyance as I attempted to start a fire using some shoestring and a stick.

Sans looked at me in confusion,

"Don't _rub_ this the wrong way, but what the hell are ya doing?" He asked.

"I'm using friction to start a fire, if you rub something hard and long enough it will start a fire." I explained.

Sans' smile turned mischievous,

"Oh, are you experienced in the field of rubbing things?"

To answer his question I flicked him off.

After about ten minutes I got the fire started. I sat as close as I could to it, trying to turn my pink skin back to its usual color. All Sans did was stare into the flames, his bones shimmering softly while reflecting the light. Perhaps now was the time to ask some questions?

"So, how come the inside of your skull is pitch black even though there's plenty of light?" I asked him.

He put one phalange to where his lips would be and pondered for a moment.

"Skeleton monsters have an affinity for void magic. So, instead of us just being bones, certain areas are actually a version of the void."

"Void?" I asked.

"Its sort of like a plane between the physical world. A vast nothingness, where no light goes. Where the laws of physics are sort of turned on their head."

That explanation reminded me of some scientific theories.

"Do you think it could be another universe, or perhaps what is inside a black hole?" I asked him.

He shrugged,

"Trust me when I say that you wouldn't want to figure it out. The Void is infinite and you can get trapped easily."

I nodded in understanding, yet I still felt unsatisfied with the answer.

"How come you are a skeleton, especially one that resembles a human one?"

He smiled,

"How come that you are a skeleton with just fleshy bits on?" He countered.

I narrowed my eyes at him softly. He held up his hands in surrender before continuing,

"The running theory is that an anomaly happened at a gravesite and decided to create a monster in the image of a skeleton. Truly, we don't exactly know."

I nodded my head and decided to join him in staring into the flames. We sat in silence for a good amount of time. I was simply savoring the warmth of the fire and Sans pondering over whatever was in his head.

"What is the surface like?"

I snapped my head up as his voice. He stared above, to where the surface would be. An expression I could not describe painted on his face. I sighed because I knew the answer would not be satisfying.

"It is cruel and unforgiving. Being different gets you ostracized, the amount of wealth you are born into defines your social status, kindness is repaid in blood. It is a world where the faint of heart are left to die. There are no friends, simply put, there are people that wish to use you first before they make you an enemy."

The look on his face said it all. He already knew the answer I was going to give. He already knew the world.

"Yet... there is beauty. In the snow, in the trees, and in the ocean. There is beauty in the kindness of innocents before it is ripped away and replaced with either death or cruelty. That beauty is limited because the environment is tainted with hatred. The innocents tainted with selfishness. Savor what beauty you find up there because it will be ripped away and remade in hatred's glory." I finished.

He looked at me with a kind expression, I was confused at first, then I felt the freezing bite of liquid on my cheeks. It was then I noticed I was crying. There was no disorder in my lamentation, just light tears shed in the loss of my own innocence. Innocence replaced with hatred and selfishness. Innocence paid in broken bones and blood.

I lifted my head to look at his face and noticed the mirror reflection. His tears were a bright blue, softly rolling down his ossein cheeks. He too lamented. He too shared the pain I felt. The loss of innocence replaced with hatred of the world around us. We stared into each other's eyes, white pinpricks to light blue. The Empty Comedian and the Emotionless Shadow. Both sides of the same coin.

Sans stood up and wiped his tears off into his sleeve. He stared down at me for a few seconds before offering me his hand. I stared at the gathering of phalanges and carpals before lightly placing my own into his. I would have imagined his bones to be stone cold, yet they were warmer than my own flesh. He lifted me up with surprising gentleness, allowing me to easily rise to my feet. We stood in front of each other for a few moments, my thoughts racing before I decided what I wanted. What I needed.

I leaned forward and hugged him softly. He stiffened slightly. He did nothing for a couple of seconds before returning the hug in earnest. This was nothing like Toriel. This hug wasn't awkward, nor was it unwanted for either party.

He smelled of a vast evergreen forest. His warmth exceeded my own ten-fold, it was almost as if the winter landscape around us had not existed. The most surprising was that I heard a heartbeat. Like a deep percussion drum on a slow beat.

Why did I want this? Why did I cry? Why now? I locked my emotions away with the tightest padlock and thrown away the key. Yet now, I mind as well of left the gate open. For the first time in my life, I felt reciprocated. I felt understood. I felt akin to another instead of contrast.

I stepped out of the hug and looked up to Sans.

She stepped out of my grip and looked up to me.

For the first time I genuinely smiled a kind smile.

For the first time, I saw her smile be genuine.

For the first time I felt understood.

For the first time I could be true to another.

I didn't have to be distant.

I didn't have to make jokes to hide my despair.

We had a friend.


	6. Snowstorms

Umbra and I began walking to the next area. The snow that crunched beneath our feet was seemingly the only noise in the deafening silence. It was turning morning and I noticed how Umbra's movements started to slow slightly, indicating that she has not gotten any sleep recently. Of course, I thought about just taking a shortcut with her in tow to Snowdin Village but the thought of making Papyrus happy forbade me not to. Though I still felt guilt over it, especially now since we made that connection.

_I held out my hand to her. Her tear-stained face looked at it in confusion before placing her hand in mine. Her hand was smaller than mine and it very cold, even though she was sitting next to a fire. I gently lifted her to her feet, it was then we stared at each other. Her bright blue eyes froze me in place. They told a sad story, one of loss, one of hatred, and one of being caged._

_She caged her feelings, caged her emotions, and I felt an immense sense of pity and sadness at that fact. I may have only known Umbra for one day, I may have distrusted her when I first met her, but right now, I felt sadness for this person._

_It was then I felt tightness around my ribs and looked down. This human that expressed almost no emotion, was willingly hugging me. I felt this uncontrollable need to return it. I knew that this is what I needed._

_As soon as I returned the hug I felt this spark. I loved my brother, but this hug was something else. It held this immense sense of understanding, of twin lives. She smelled of light rain in the morning, the small amount of chaos that tainted a bright day. I smiled softly into her hair, never wanting to part from this small comfort._

_The small comfort that made me finally care about someone that wasn't my brother._

I put my hands in my hoodie pockets as we walked side by side. I looked over to her and noticed her own hands were casually in her own pockets of her jeans. Her stature was entirely different than before, she was closer to me almost touching my arm, she wasn't constantly glancing back at me, and she wasn't tense. For some odd reason, I took pleasure in that fact.

It was then I heard a familiar laugh and I smiled. Papyrus began walking towards us, striding confident steps,

"SANS I NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT UNDYNE..."

He trailed off at the sight of the other person.

"SANS... WHAT IS THAT NEXT TO YOU?"

I looked to the right of me and saw a rock,

"I think it's a rock bro." I answered him.

"OH..."

I then placed my hand on Umbra's head,

"Oh, do you mean this one bro?"

His face brightened up considerably,

"OH MY GOD SANS," Papyrus' voice then became a whisper, even though Umbra and I could both hear him from the few feet he was before us, "Is that a human?"

I smiled widely before cupping my right hand next to my mouth and whispering back loudly, "Yes."

The excitement on Papyrus' face was almost contagious. However, when I looked over to Umbra she was like before our encounter. Her body was tense, her arms crossed over her chest, and her eyes never left Papyrus. I frowned before hearing Papyrus,

"SANS I FINALLY DID IT! UNDYNE WILL... I'M GANNA... ILL BE SO..." He was beyond excited and was extremely flustered.

"POPULAR! POPULAR! POPULAR!" He finished.

He coughed as he looked over to Umbra, finally addressing her.

"HUMAN! YOU SHALL NOT PASS THIS AREA! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL STOP YOU! I WILL THEN CAPTURE YOU! YOU WILL BE DELIVERED TO THE CAPITAL! THEN... THEN!!!" He paused slightly before narrowing his eyes in confusion, "I'M NOT SURE WHAT'S NEXT. IN ANY CASE! CONTINUE IF YOU DARE!!" He laughed his signature laugh as he ran off into the distance. I looked over to her and noticed a dark look on her face.

"What's up kid?" I asked.

She relaxed only slightly at my voice,

"He sounds certain at the fact that he will capture me. Do you really think he won't?"

Before I could think of an answer I continued automatically,

"Even if he does, I won't let him."

She widened her eyes at me, seemingly shocked.

"Isn't that against the law? Wouldn't it be easier to just give me to the King?" She asked.

I narrowed my eyes and placed my hand on her shoulder,

"You aren't a bad kid. You don't deserve to be killed."

She emitted a biting laugh at that statement. She looked down at the snow as her face softened.

"Sans I have hurt people, I have almost killed people. Of course, they wanted to harm me in the first place but I hurt them so they wouldn't come after me anymore." She paused slightly, "I immediately resorted to violence. How am I not a bad person?"

I narrowed my eyes once again. Immediately resorting to violence is something someone who had a few levels of LoVe did. But that means that she had to of killed someone.

"Umbra, I need you to start a battle with me." I said simply.

She looked at me in confusion and was immediately standoffish.

"Why?" Was all she asked.

"I need to see your Level of Violence, EXP, and HoPe." She was still tense but nodded in affirmation. It was then I felt a gentle tug at my soul as we initiated the formal combat sequence.

I looked over to the manifestation of her soul. Of course, only she could see it's true nature while in combat, I only saw a white heart-shaped soul. I, however, saw the full colors of mine. Bright light blue with soft little cracks, it had the softest tinge of yellow that shimmered over the surface, almost non-existent. I frowned at my soul, at it's broken form. However, that is not what we were here for. I looked over her stats quickly.

HoPe: 4/4, LoVe: 5, EXP: 0.

My eyes widened at first but after I few seconds I sighed in understanding. Her hope reminded me of my own, except she still clung onto something. However, her LoVe and EXP were odd. You gained LoVe through killing, yet she had never gained one Execution Point. It was then I finally understood why... The Surface. To be tortured every day, to be beaten and broken. To be hated with no love to counteract it. Of course, you would become more violent, of course, you would immediately resort to it.

I sighed as I ended the combat sequence and felt my soul return to my body. I felt relief knowing that she has never killed anyone, but even as I felt that relief I felt pity.

How horrible must the Surface be if you can gain LoVe without killing anyone?

* * *

After our mock battle, Sans and I took refuge in the sentry station that Papyrus built. It began to snow pretty hard and I was freezing to death. We had the door open and built a fire right outside of it so we had less of a risk to burn down the station. I sat pretty close to the door, fully absorbing the warmth the fire provided while Sans sat at the far edge of the station. As I leaned against the wall of the station my eyes started to sag with sleep. I was going on twenty-four hours of no sleep and I was just starting to feel the effects. Of course, I could keep going if I wanted to, as I've done it before plenty of times, but I felt somewhat... safe. I heard Sans chuckle softly at my determination to stay awake. It was then I heard shuffling and decided to see what he was doing. He was taking off his jacket, as he took it off I noticed how large it made him look. When he got it off he handed it to me. I simply stared at the gesture for a few moments.

"Don't look a gift skeleton in the mouth kid, take the jacket, you're freezing." He said.

I tentatively took the jacket and wrapped it around me. The scent of an evergreen forest enveloped me. I've always liked the smell of a forest, so Sans smelling like one was a magnificent coincidence.

"Why" I asked.

He winked at me, "It's what friends do."

I couldn't help but smile softly as I turned my body to the fire, away from his. My smile quickly turned to a frown when I started thinking. Why do I feel safe? I know it's because of Sans, but I still ask why? Was it deeper than some mild connection? I have yet to actually meet someone so alike to me and still function somewhat normally.

_The school hosted another meeting in the auditorium, a congregation of one of the kids that committed suicide._

_"It always tears at my heart when another of our own meets their end..." The woman began._

_Bullshit lady, nobody here cares. It was no secret why Ebbot has one of the highest suicide rates among teenagers in the country. If you aren't born to some high society parents you have two choices. Adapt or give up. Most kids give up pretty early. Getting physically, mentally, and verbally abused every day will fuck kids up, and eventually, most of them turn to suicide. I remember seeing the kids in the library or lunchroom sitting alone. They don't eat, speak, or do anything. They just exist, already making the choice of not going on anymore. I looked at those kids and felt mild disappointment. To so easily give up was shameful but I sort of understood why. I once felt similar to how they felt, yet I got up on my feet and made the devil-spawn fear me. They simply didn't have the determination to continue._

It was rare to me. To see someone still telling the world fuck you and to continue on. Perhaps, that is why I feel safe. This kinship we have. Was that all though? I had no other explanation as to why I felt this way around him now. I sighed softly and decided that if I didn't know then I didn't know. I closed my eyes and let the swift embrace of sleep take me.

_I once again found myself oddly aware. Surrounded by impeding darkness, unable to move. I couldn't help but feel my flight response start to kick in. It was an odd feeling since I almost always resorted to the fight portion. I heard a soft childish giggle and immediately felt a shiver of unadulterated fear run down my spine._

_"Umbra...Umbra... Starting to make friends are we? How do you know if he is truly your friends though?_

_"What are you?" I asked into the abyss._

_Another giggle resonated through the vast nothingness I was inhabiting._

_"I am... Determination." They answered._

_It was then the child appeared before me. I couldn't really tell what gender they were but if I had to guess they would be female._

_"Why bother me?" I asked her._

_"We are... very alike. You and I." She answered me._

_I frowned, mostly because I couldn't read her._

_"How so?"_

_She giggling once again, making my spine crawl and my muscles scream to run._

_"Determination is a very simple thing, Umbra. The will to continue. The will to keep trying." She paused and smiled maliciously. "Tell me, how easy would it be to just kill everyone and get out of this place? You wouldn't have to deal with these monsters anymore."_

_How reminiscent of a certain flower I know._

_"And go back to the Surface? What do I gain from that?" I told her._

_"Oh but Umbra, what about that promise to yourself?"_

_I froze. How did this fucking brat know?_

_"Remember, these monsters will kill you if they know who you are. They will violate your soul and take it for themselves." She explained._

_I frowned. Was this... girl... trying to make me kill these monsters?_

_"If it comes to that then I will try my best to live."_

_Would I really try? It would be easy to just throw myself at the monsters, they would kill me and in the end, I could be useful for something. Yet, even as I thought this I knew this possibility would never come._

_The girl smiled sweetly, yet all I felt at it was fear._

_"Don't try. Do it."_

_It was then she disappeared into the air. I felt the world around me turn and squeeze me. Everything that I knew ceased to exist as I went back into unconscious thoughts._

* * *

I frowned at Umbra's sleeping form. She twitched softly every now and then and would sometimes make noise.

It had already been about four hours since she fell asleep. The snowstorm dissipated and some people would think that the brightness of Snowdin was a wonderful thing. I, of course, abhorred the artificial light magic created. I looked over back to Umbra and noticed the fire was getting low. I quietly used my magic to levitate some logs and add them to the fire. I sighed as I felt exhaustion run through me. I couldn't sleep as I felt the need to watch over Umbra. I felt this protectiveness similar to how I did with Papyrus.

Umbra stirred softly and began to move sluggishly.

"Rise and shine, sunshine."

She grumbled in response and turned over to look at me. Her hair really needed some grooming. It stuck out everywhere and looked very similar to some anime characters Alphys liked.

"Didn't know you were so _prickly_ in the morning." I told her.

She simply raised her middle finger at me and I barked out a hearty laugh.

It took about ten minutes, but eventually, we were both ready to continue on the road to Snowdin. As we continued on I noticed how she still had bags under her eyes and she seemed... off.

_I hope she didn't have a bad dream._


	7. Thrilling Lies and Apprehension

We walked for a while, doing puzzles that Papyrus insisted that we do. They mostly were simple brain teasers or failures. Overall, I found the experience boring and tedious, yet I made a promise to Sans that I would do it to make his brother happy. I found myself looking over to Sans, to see if he knew that I truly did not enjoy the task I put myself to. However, all I found was an immense amount of joy and happiness on his face. If there was one thing about this skeleton that everyone knows is that he loved his brother. I knew that deep down I felt jealous of Papyrus. I have not interacted with the taller skeleton enough to know if he was truly this childish and ignorant, but if only he knew how lucky he is to have someone love him. The emotions, I knew, were immature to experience and I knew I should be happy for Papyrus, yet emotions hardly ever interact in the realm of maturity and reasonability. Overall, my day so far has been irritating and boring, to say the least.

One of the more interesting things to happen so far is the married dogs that were apart of the royal guard.

* * *

Sans and I were walking around in the blinding sun, he was cracking jokes about selling fried snow while I listened on with a soft smile. It was then I heard shuffling in the snow and immediately stopped to assess the surroundings. Sans stood still as well, hands in his pockets without care. After a few seconds, two dogs came up with axes in their paws and a heavy black hoodie over their bodies. One was obviously female and the other male, they were basically attached at the hip and I assumed they were either a couple, really close friends, or family.

They stepped closer and sniffed toward me,

"Sans, why is there a thing that smells awfully like a human with you?" The male dog asked.

"Yes, that does not smell like a puppy or other monster!" The female one contributed.

I looked towards Sans, wondering what his answer would be.

"I found Umbra a ways back, she told me she was lost and needed to find Snowdin. I don't think she's a human, but I'm escorting her just in case." Sans answered casually.

After he answered them he very carefully pulled one phalange to his nose, or where his nose would be, and pointed to it then towards where his heart would be. I looked at him for a second, confused, but then I got it. They can smell fear, effectively smelling out lies.

I smiled mischievously at him, Sans was an experienced liar. To be able to trick these dogs you would have to basically convince your own being that what you are saying is the truth or you are _very_ good at controlling your heart rate and the release of hormones and chemicals in your body.

They sniffed him quickly and immediately turned towards me,

"Tiny monster, where do you come from?" The female asked me. I thought for a moment on how to proceed, after that second passed I winked to Sans before beginning my show.

"I-I came from the Ruins, there was a big mean flower chasing me, threatening to kill me and I just kept running until I found a door and pushed it open. B-Before I knew it I was in the Snow and the door behind me wouldn't open. I know there's a town called Snowdin here and I hoped I could reach it if I could keep on walking." I stopped for a second, letting tears fall from my face as I made myself hysterical. I sniffled softly and _calmed_ down before continuing. "Then Sans found me! And we have been playing for a while with his brother, he's really nice!"

It took all I had to not start laughing as they nodded in agreement. I looked over at Sans. He had a mixed reaction of shock combined with a mischievous grin.

"Oh, don't be sad little monster, we will make sure no flowers will ever harm you! For my wife and I will protect every monster down here because we are the Royal Guard!" The male said. "Yes! Dogamy, my love, let us make sure no flowers are back there causing mischief!" It was then they sauntered off from where we came from, after about a minute, both Sans and I started laughing uncontrollably.

After we laughed for what seemed like an eternity we calmed down and began to walk again. Sans ceased his jokes, however, and we continued on in wanted silence.

* * *

Afer I reminisced on the encounter with the dogs I found myself looking as Sans as we approached a bridge over a long drop. He has been strangely silent ever since the dogs. I frowned as I thought over the multiple reasons as to why he is foregoing his usual jovial, slightly lazy demeanor. He could just value silence, but it seemed to closely related to Dogamy and Dogaressa, as Sans confirmed the female dog's name to me after the encounter. Was it the lying? Did my acting skills shake him? No, we laughed about it afterward as if we enjoyed it. Maybe that was it, the enjoyment of lying, the thrill of evading and deceiving. I myself had an uneasy fascination and enjoyment with lying. It was second nature to me, telling white lies and large ones. The act of deceiving, of getting the upper hand, emitted a primal enjoyment within me. I could tell that Sans was also a seasoned liar. Easily manipulating the ones around him to believe that his laziness was not a cause for concern. To make it seem like he still had color when he told his jokes that had long lost their humor in him. This did not answer my question, however. Was he scared of me? Himself? Was he simply thinking over the situation? I did not know and my ignorance infuriated me so.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked calmly.

He stopped just before stepping onto the bridge. It was night now and I could see the lights from Snowdin village illuminate his face as he looked back to me. He mulled over the question for a few seconds before answering me,

"I just don't want the dogs to _hound_ over you and figuring out that you are human."

I frowned softly as I examined the worried look he was trying to hold back.

"Sans, I am not good with reassuring people but they will have a hard time figuring out if I am human through scent alone." I told him. He only became more anxious.

"Yes Umbra, but what if they force a fight on you, as soon as you engage in a fight they know that you are human."

"How would they know?" I asked.

"When you engage in a fight with a human, their stats are revealed to you. There are only a few monsters in the Underground with a LoVe higher than one. All of them are known and respected."

"So I take it that monsters gaining love are not a common occurrence?" I asked.

He shook his head in confirmation, "Monsters are a peaceful species, we only engage in fights for fun really or if we truly are in danger."

I nodded my head and thought for a moment. Damn, I guess I really have to be careful.

"I'll try not to go anywhere on my own and do all I can to not engage in fights with monsters." I assured him.

He only slightly relaxed before letting a soft smile light his face.

"I don't want to cage ya in, kid."

I frowned softly, "I don't understand, its the only way to even assure a modicum of safety. I am not bothered with it at all, even more so that you aren't even annoying to be around." I told him.

He laughed softly, "Well it's good to hear that I am not annoying from at least someone."

He turned and began to walk on the bridge, I stared after him for a moment before continuing on with him.

* * *

To say I was nervous would be an understatement. The wood creaked under myself and Umbra as we both walked over the bridge. How was I going to make sure she was safe without basically being a bodyguard 24/7? It would get suspicious very quickly if I was always seen with the newcomer.

As I mulled over my thoughts I heard a familiar brotherly laugh at the end of the bridge. I looked up to see my brother laughing and pointing at Umbra.

"HUMAN!" he called out.

He looked over to me before adding, "AND BROTHER!" I waved at him softly.

"THIS IS YOUR FINAL AND MOST DANGEROUS CHALLENGE! IF YOU WOULD SANS PLEASE COME STAND BY ME!"

I walked over lazily to see what _dangerous_ challenge Papyrus had in store for Umbra. When I finally made it to where I stood next to my brother he continued,

"BEHOLD! THE GAUNTLET OF DEADLY TERROR!"

It was then I noticed that this was indeed dangerous. There were spears, morning stars, fire, a cannon, and a tied-up dog. This was not Papyrus', this was Undyne's traps, minus the dog.

I looked over to Umbra who, for the first time, sported a fearful look on her face.

"WHEN I SAY THE WORD, IT WILL FULLY ACTIVATE!" CANNONS WILL FIRE! SPIKES WILL SWING! BLADES WILL SLICE! EACH PART WILL SWING VIOLENTLY UP AND DOWN! ONLY THE TINIEST CHANCE OF VICTORY WILL REMAIN!

I looked at my brother, he seemed... apprehensive. It was then I realized that he would not attack Umbra, although I prepared myself to save her just in case. I looked over to Umbra to see how she was faring and she still had a fearful look yet all she did was look at me. It was then I decided to try and see if there was some way to warn her that it would be okay. I did so in the only way I knew how. I signed the word _trust_ to her in sign language. Her eyes immediately widened and she nodded slightly at me, seemingly in understanding. Although I noticed that she was still poised to run at any given moment, not fully resigning herself to trust me fully. I internally smirked and praised her for still being somewhat untrusting.

"ARE YOU READY?! BECAUSE! I! AM! ABOUT! TO DO IT!" Papyrus continued.

There came a pause, nothing was happening. I looked over to him and noticed this pained look in his eyes. Time to test him.

"Well. What's the holdup?" I asked him.

He looked to me, still having the look of apprehension and pain in his eyes.

"HOLDUP!? WHAT HOLDUP?! I'M... I'M ABOUT TO ACTIVATE IT NOW!!" He continued on. Again another pause of a lot of nothing happening.

"That doesn't look very activated, Papyrus." I deadpanned.

"WELL!! THIS CHALLENGE! IT SEEMS.... MAYBE TOO EASY TO DEFEAT THE HUMAN WITH!! YEAH WE CAN'T USE THIS ONE!! I AM A SKELETON WITH STANDARDS!!! MY PUZZLES ARE VERY FAIR!! AND MY TRAPS ARE EXPERTLY COOKED!! BUT THIS METHOD IS TOO DIRECT, NO CLASS AT ALL!!! AWAY IT GOES!!" He answered.

You could see the tension in Umbra fade away as the traps were magicked away. I imagine that she saw the same reaction in me as I felt a literal weight being lifted off of me.

"PHEW!" Papyrus looked over to Umbra, as she was staring at him.

"WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT!? THIS WAS ANOTHER DECISIVE VICTORY FOR PAPYRUS!!!"

He began to laugh but it turned into a questioning one as he ran away.

After watching him run off I noticed Umbra crossed the bridge and stood next to me. I looked down at her and noticed the dark look on her face.

"Watchya thinking about, kid?" I asked her.

She looked up to me with a questioning expression.

"Did you know he wasn't going to do it?" She asked me.

"I was almost certain he wouldn't but I wouldn't of let him hurt you, I was prepared to teleport you out just in case." I answered her.

"But you weren't convinced?"

I grimaced softly before answering her, "He wants to have friends, to be popular, I hoped that he would value his kindness over that fact."

She simply sighed softly in an answer. After a moment she decided to add more than that,

"It's going to take a lot of strength to give up that opportunity. I have seen the want to be popular destroy people, as they let their morals and sense of self evaporate over it." 

It wasn't a reassurance, it was a warning as to what Papyrus could let himself become. I copied her and sighed in exasperation. We began to walk into Snowdin together, both of us mulling over our thoughts as we walked to the wooden house in the distance.


	8. A Home

The town was bustling, even for its small size and how late it was at night. Monster children would chase each other, seemingly playing games. There was a bar called Grilbys where most of the inhabitants were currently residing. Sans told me about it in excruciating detail about how much time he spent there, surprisingly eating ketchup, which was his so-called favorite cuisine. I stayed silent during the whole escapade on which brand of ketchup was the best, as I was taking in the surroundings, figuring out where everything was. Once my eyes set on the Library, or Librarby as it is so spelled, I knew that I would spend a good amount of time in there. Sans noticed my internal glee and pointed out how it was nice to know me while he got the chance because it looked like he would never see me again with the look I had towards the misspelled place. Eventually, we reached his home.

It was a modest two-story house that had a moderate amount of snow on its shingles. Of course, like everything else with the town, it was littered with Christmas lights and decoration even though it was February.

"What's with all the Christmas decorations?" I asked.

Sans' smile grew a little more,

"Snowdin likes to celebrate Christmas year-round, we figured since we always have the weather for it, mind as well celebrate it constantly." He explained.

"Wouldn't that get old?" I countered.

He looked at me in exaggerated agast, complete with the feminine placement of the hand against the throat,

"How grinchy and unspirited does a person have to be to get old of Christmas?"

"Sorry my heart is about twelve sizes too small." I responded.

Sans barked out a laugh as he led me inside his abode.

The place looked well lived in. A worn green couch faced a decently sized TV that was currently off. Directly in front of me lay a small kitchen with an older looking tile floor. Up above lay the upstairs space with two doors at the top.

"Admiring my lovely home?" He pulled me out of my thoughts.

"Such extravagance and exuberant wealth deserves to be admired." I deadpanned.

He gave out another hearty laugh as he walked to the couch and lazily fell into the cushions. I wonder why he liked my humor, well maybe I shouldn't since the man only deals in puns, but still, I'm not good at the whole humor thing. Although, the new experience of not being looked at like you had an alien on your head as you tried your damndest to make someone laugh was welcoming.

"You gonna sit on the couch or do you only do it on hard wooden stations?" He asked me.

I rolled my eyes and approached the couch. I laid my backpack against the side and sat comfortably into the worn sofa. Surprisingly the cushions were very squishy.

Sans laid back with his eyes closed and hands resting behind his head while I stared into a wall, lost in some abstract thoughts. Suddenly, my stomach broke the silence.

"Kid, you don't have to _growl_ at me." Sans said.

"I do believe that by the end of this my eyes will be permanently stuck behind my sockets." I told him.

He snorted softly as I leaned over to get my backpack and took out some spider doughnuts to eat. I loved the donuts as I had always been a sucker for candy and other delectables. However, I preferred sour candies over sweetness.

After finishing the doughnuts I looked over to Sans,

"So is that Inn pretty good?" I asked.

He opened one eye-socket to look at me and raised the bone where his eyebrow would be,

"Yeah, why do you ask?"

I cocked my head as I stared at him,

"Because I'm going to need somewhere to stay?" I questioned him.

"You can just stay here." He said.

"I wouldn't want to intrude and make yours and Papyrus' lives difficult."

"Trust me you won't, kid. Plus this is safer for you because of less chance of being discovered and its free." He told me.

I frowned and decided to drop the subject. In his own words, I shouldn't look a gift skeleton in the mouth.

I soon found myself drifting off, the silence and comfortable warmth did wonders to my resolve against sleeping. I found myself slipping into a light unconsciousness, the barrier between sleep and consciousness was thin as the ghostings of dreams frolicked in my brain. In the background, I could hear the soft giggling of a child, so negligent that I doubted it even existed. Betwixt the lull of my unconscious thoughts and the insistence of cognizance was truly a magnificent feeling of safety and relaxation. Although good things rarely stay as such in my life.

I jolted awake as I heard the door slam open and looked at the intrusion. It was indeed the seven-foot-tall skeleton, Papyrus.

"BROTHER I'M HOME!" Papyrus bellowed out.

He looked over to the couch and blanched visibility at my form before going back to his cheerful self.

"HUMAN, HOW WONDERFUL IT IS TO SEE YOU AGAIN! I ASSUME SANS OFFERED YOU REFUGE AT OUR AMAZINGLY AWESOME HOME?!"

I cocked my head at him. It was strange, it seemed he truly liked me being here. Perhaps the fear he expressed was simply at the last meeting we had? Or was he lying about the wonderfulness of myself being here?

"Indeed." I replied simply.

"HOW WONDERFUL, SANS IT IS NICE TO SEE YOU BEING NICE FOR A CHANGE!"

All I heard in a reply was an exhausted huff. I turned to look at Sans and noticed that he looked he went to hell and decided to make a whole day of it there before returning to the realm of the living.

It seemed as if Papyrus noticed this as well,

"WELL I'M GOING TO GO TO MY ROOM! HUMAN ILL MAKE BREAKFAST IN THE MORNING!"

I simply watched him enter the room on the left at the top of the stairs before returning my gaze back to Sans. He was 100% no longer in the realm of the living. I don't know how magical skeletons work, but if he was human I'm sure he would have multiple medical problems by his thirties by the way he was laying.

I sighed as I noticed the blanket laying on the back of the couch. I unraveled the neatly folded blanket and saw that it would cover both of us splendidly even though was lay on opposite sides. A pillow would complete the magnificence of the makeshift bed, but I would settle with mild comfort and beloved warmth.

Eventually I found myself in the betwixt of sleep and awareness. I reveled in that feeling for some time before allowing myself to fall into a deeper sleep.

My dreams were like any normal dream. Very confusing and jumping from place to place. Although, there was one constant throughout. The giggling of a child.

* * *

I dreamed of a woman with short black hair and almost glowing blue eyes smiling brightly. Laughing, and enjoying herself like most others. We would throw snowballs at each other, eat at Grillby's, and gaze at the star-like bioluminescence on the ceilings of Waterfall. We would walk through Hotland, both of us annoyed at the heat, before finding ourselves in New Home.

It was then she shifted into a girl with bright blonde hair that looked like a cowboy. A heart of Justice. She felt for the Monster's plight and never killed. I watched as Asgore cut her down without a second thought. A trident coated in blood and gore as the girl died in pain, but with a pitying smile. Then, of course, she shifted into the boy. As soon as this boy, filled to the brim with Bravery, fell into the Underground the demon's influence got him. By Snowdin, he killed multiple monsters as the demonic red eyes watched with glee. Undyne and I cornered him in Hotland and I was forced to kill the boy dozens of times before the child found enough Bravery and Determination to end the demon's influence within him. Countless times I stared at a broken boy's body, with spears and bones impaling him as the world ceased to exist around me and I was forced to repeat the same actions as before. 

Then, the boy shifted to the dark-haired, light-eyed woman. Her penetrating gaze pierced my soul and held me in place as they always did. Then, her eyes changed to blood red and her lips turned into the manic one of the demon as she ran forward to stab me with a knife. I could move, I could defend myself. Yet, I stood there as the beautiful woman I now called a friend cut my soul to ribbons.

* * *

I found myself staring at the ceiling long after I jolting from my dreams. Guilt, remorse, fear, anxiety, and hatred mixed and made an ugly color of emotions that I was feeling. Yet, when I found myself looking at Umbra across from me, I felt none of these feelings. It would be smart, to end her now. It would be a mercy for multiple people, most likely including herself. I knew she was a prime candidate for the demon to take over, just like the boy. Yet, she was older and largely independent. There was a small chance, ever so small, that she would be okay. That we wouldn't have to kill her. The practical side of me screamed denial but the emotional side was overriding my usual preference of logic. How could I kill her? We were kindred spirits, two sides of the same coin, we had this understanding and for the first time, I no longer felt alone. I felt tears roll down my cheeks as my brain overloaded with emotions. Throughout all of my turmoil, throughout all of the impractical and instability of my emotions, I knew one thing for certain.

I would never be able to kill this woman.


	9. Arduous Veracity

I awoke feeling well-rested except for the minor creak in the neck. I lifted my head to see if Sans was still on the couch, yet found nothing but the ghosting of an indentation. I sat up, not enjoying the sluggish feeling in my limbs and noticed the smell of cooking in the air. A cordial humming reached my ears from the kitchen and I looked on curiously. After a few seconds, my sluggish brain remembered that Papyrus was going to cook breakfast.

I grunted as I got up from the couch. I stretched lightly and cracked my neck before heading into the modestly sized kitchen.

"AH, YOU HAVE FINALLY AWOKEN, HUMAN!" Papyrus beamed brightly at me.

I sniffed softly in indifference and looked over to see what he was cooking. For some odd reason, it looked like spaghetti noodles.

I myself, not being a picky eater just looked away from the pasta and leaned against the wall towards Papyrus.

"Do you guys have a bathroom here?" I asked.

"YES, THERE IS A HALLWAY UPSTAIRS THAT LEADS TO ONE ON THE LEFT!"

"Alright, where is Sans by the way?" I questioned.

"HE IS MOST LIKELY AT WORK AT HIS SENTRY STATION. I IMAGINE HE WILL BE HOME IN A COUPLE OF HOURS!"

Papyrus had a gleeful expression on his face when he talked about Sans. I noted how much these two seemed to care for each other before leaving the kitchen and going to find the restroom.

* * *

After spending some time grooming my hair into a somewhat acceptable position, I decided to change out of the clothes I traveled in into something else. It was a maroon sweater with black jeans and I wore my regular combat boots.

I sighed as I looked into the mirror. The woman I saw was not recognizable to me. Others, with far much less observational skills, would see a somewhat beautiful yet weathered girl.

Although, the ones that trained their eyes to see the smallest of details would see the girl I saw. Broken, tired, beaten, disgusting. You could see how defeated I was by the bags under my eyes and the wavering of my pupils. All I saw was a fragile glass where I wanted a stone wall to be. I grimaced and tightened my fists in hatred and rage. How dare I cry to a man I just met? How dare he make me so weak that I want to rely on him? I just wanted to be strong, I wanted to never be weak, I never wanted to rely on anyone else ever again. I didn't want him to be _her._

No, never think of that _disgusting_ excuse of a human ever again. I hope that _she_ was fucking stabbed and beaten until she uttered her last _useless_ breath.

I looked back at the mirror and saw myself smiling in manic glee.

Impractical, turmoil, chaos. This is what I am and what I am I despise. The innate desire within me to rip, tear, shred, bite, claw. I could feel it creeping closer. How good would it feel to just _fucking_ kill someone. To have that primitive control.

**To become stronger. To become the master of the world. To hold life in your hands and crush it within your fist. How wonderful! How delicious!**

**Wouldn't it be amazing, to just win the game of life? To become the master of reality? You have your sharp knives, let them taste the blood of those who would deceive you. That skeleton will be the first to lie and trick you. To murder you and relish the blood on his hands. Kill him, make it slow, make it painful. Torture him and crush his soul under your boot!**

My head snapped up into the mirror and I met a woman with glowing blood-red eyes and breathing heavily. Every muscle screamed in agony as if they wanted to heed this desire.

I clenched my teeth as I shut my eyes and slowly leaned back against a wall and fell opposite of the mirror.

**Kill. Kill. Kill.**

No, this isn't control. This is releasing it. This isn't what I want, is it? I held my hands against the sides of my head as I rocked back and forth.

No, never. I shall never lose control.

I stood back up and looked back into the mirror. I saw a woman with pale blue eyes that looked slightly disheveled.

I will _never_ be weak.

* * *

The Sentry station in Snowdin was typically boring. Nothing excited, which is exactly how I love it. Nothing to worry about, nothing to run to or fight. Simply the perfect snowy paradise.

The Royal Guard hardly ever had to do anything. We were just titled figureheads that the monster kids got excited about. Of course, the few times something exciting happened, someone died in the process. All of that exertion wasn't good for the soul in my opinion. Although, the benefits were that I got to sleep for a couple of hours without interruption during my shifts. I may love my brother, but he isn't the type you want to be around when you're tired and want to sleep.

I sighed heavily as I heard the crunching of snow approach me.

"Sup Dogamy." I said softly.

"Sans, I have come to relieve you. Unfortunately, my wife couldn't come with me today." Dogamy replied.

"What's up?" I breathed out as I got out of the station.

"She came down with something minor. Although she feels like shit. Hows that little monster doing?"

I took quiet deep breaths as I calmed myself,

"She is doing fine, I'm allowing her to stay at my place until we figure out a way to get her back home."

It's not even a lie. Easy, don't even have to worry.

"Ah, I wish you the best of luck on that. I guess I'll see you at Grillby's?" Dogamy said.

I hummed as I thought about going before decided on staying with Umbra for a few more days.

"I'll be at the house with the kid for a few days, I feel like getting to know her is the best option." I replied.

"Okay, I'll see you whenever then." Dogamy said as he entered the station.

I sighed as I teleported back to the front of my house. Seeing Dogamy reminded me that I should ask Umbra about that killer flower she mentioned to them. It could be _that_ specific kind of flora. I groaned at the thought of the devil flower getting involved as I walked into the house.

I walked into my wonderfully bland home and noticed nothing amiss. Papyrus was sitting down on the couch, along with Umbra, watching Mettaton's show.

"AH, BROTHER, I WAS JUST SHOWING UMBRA METTATON!" Papyrus said gleefully.

I managed to not snort at the thought of Umbra watching that fake pile of bolts and enjoying it. Of course, when she turned to face me, her face betrayed the amount of boredom and horror she was feeling. It took all of my negligible willpower to refrain from bursting out laughing.

"I'm sorry to attempt to take Umbra away from watching the best show in the Underground, but I have to talk to her about something important." I told my brother.

Umbra cocked her head at me. I've begun to notice how much she did that and how bird-like the movement was. It was almost unnatural.

"OH, GO AHEAD, IT'S ALMOST OVER ANYWAYS!" Papyrus said without moving his eyes off the screen.

I nodded to Umbra and motioned for her to come with me. As I watched her come towards me I noticed how.... off she seemed. Her movements were so minutely sluggish that most would never notice it. But it was the look in her eyes that gave it away. Her eyes were normally piercing, calculating. Now they seemed to be dulled.

I frowned softly as we both headed out into the snow and begun to walk together slowly.

"I've been meaning to ask you this since yesterday, but it's about that flower you mentioned when you were talking to Dogamy and Dogaressa." I said to her.

"What about it?" She asked calmly.

"Well, if it's the specific golden flora that I'm thinking about... You know insane, murderous, and surprisingly strong, then I need to know if you have encountered him."

She held her arms across her body, to keep herself warm perhaps since all she had on was a sweater and jeans.

"Yeah, that sounds like Flowey." She said.

Yup, it was that specific kind of flora.

"Well, if he has his eye on you then you need to watch out for him. He normally targets the strong and determined ones that fall." I explained.

She ever so slightly, flinched at the word determined. I narrowed my eyes and went through all the possible explanations as to why she would flinch at that word. Perhaps it was just the cold? Maybe the thought of Flowey coming after her? Her being determined?

I went through all the possible ways as to why she would flinch at that, but the most likely option was the most terrifying. Did she encounter the demon?

"Well, I did beat him once, although with _some_ help. But I would of beat him I think, I was also injured at the time before meeting him." She said.

"Don't underestimate him, all his existence is for is to cause harm, to kill, to torture. He also lives to steal human souls, especially ones like yours if I'm guessing correctly about it." I explained.

She once again cocked her head at me.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"He tends to go after souls that have the main trait of Determination or the side trait of it."

_"Because the sick fucker wants to murder everyone over and over again. Fortunately, it has only happened once since he was made by Alphys, but it took what felt like years to finally put up that determination machine so that someone or something in the Underground always had more Determination than him." I thought_

"So, like the main trait of your personality?" She questioned.

"Yeah, that would be the simple answer."

I sighed as I saw the river in front of us. The chunks of ice that the Ice Wolf had thrown in floating down to The Core. I stopped and turned to face Umbra,

"Souls, have colors. Each color means a different trait. Only during two situations can a soul be let out. During fights, and if you pull it out yourself. During fights, you will never see the other's soul color, it will appear white. However, as I imagine that you noticed, you can see your own soul color, maybe even it's sub-color if it is strong enough." I explained.

"How many colors are there and what do they mean?" Umbra asked.

"Well, there's red for Determination, cyan for Patience, dark blue for integrity, orange for Bravery, green for Kindness, yellow for Justice, and purple for Perseverance. Now before you go spouting out what soul color you have, let me tell you that it's considered very... intimate to share that information."

She cocked her head slightly before realizing what I meant by intimate.

"Oh... I see." She said softly.

We both stood in silence for a few seconds.

"So monsters have sex?" She said bluntly.

I could practically feel my cheeks go blue in embarrassment as I scratched my neck nervously.

"Well, it depends. Some reproduce asexually, some require... others to be present. However, you probably mean it in the way of human reproduction. To answer your question, yes. Some monsters have reproductive organs in a similar manner to humans."

She smirked softly and got a mischievous twinkle in her eye.

"You seem to know a lot about this. Have you... experienced all of that diversity or do you like to... research?"

_"God she's such a cheeky bitch." I thought_

"Research, also I did once have a job in the scientific field that required me to learn all of those things and much more." I explained.

"Once?" She questioned.

"I got tired of it, I wanted something easier and didn't require me to be responsible for the entire populous."

"I see." was all she said.

It got sort of awkwardly quiet. I looked over to her and noticed she was looking off into nothing it seemed.

"Was this before or after you lost faith in the world?"

I flinched at her words. I cringed as it brought up memories of me living life over and over again. Killing the small, possessed boy.

"After." I said curtly.

She looked over to me and frowned softly.

"I didn't mean to stir up memories. I imagine I sounded very inconsiderate and mean, I'm sorry."

I smiled gently,

"You're fine, at least you're apologizing. I imagine that it must be a first for you." I responded cheekily.

She grinned like a Cheshire cat,

"You must be making me soft Sans, your lazy and depressive attitude is getting to me."

I began to roar with laughter at our insultive banter. We continued to exchange harsh words with each other as we walked back to the house. Although, we both were not offended and enjoyed the nature of such jokes.

Once we made it back inside the house we found Papyrus cooking dinner, once again spaghetti.

"AH, YOU BOTH HAVE FINALLY MADE IT HOME, I SEE THAT YOU ENJOYED YOUR TIME TOGETHER?" Papyrus asked from the kitchen.

"Yeah, bro. We did." I said in-between our harsh jokes.

"DINNER WILL BE READY IN ABOUT HALF AN HOUR." Papyrus yelled from the kitchen as both Umbra and I settled down on the couch.

"Alright, bro." I said.

We sat in silence for a while, the only sounds that made themselves known were Umbra's breathing and the sounds from the kitchen Papyrus was making.

"Do you think we could go to the library tomorrow? I want to learn more about monsters and their history." Umbra said.

I suddenly got this... feeling as she said those words. The want to not see her in such a populated place battled with the decision to let her go. I really didn't want her to get caught out, but I couldn't just force her to stay in the house forever and only take walks with me and not interact with anyone else.

"Alright, but I come with you and if we see any Royal Guards then we skedaddle back to this wonderful couch." I said.

"Sure, I would have suggested the same." She said.

I grinned softly a the thought of messing with her.

"You want to _research_ those suggestive things we talked about earlier." I waggled my eyebrows at her.

"Only if you are there to perform the things I find, sure." Umbra deadpanned and winked at me.

I blanched visibly and blushed what I would imagine a bright shade of cyan.

It was then, for the second time since I have met her I heard her bell-like laughter pierce the air.

"I'm joking with you obviously you lug." She said with a bright smile.

I felt my soul lurch at the sight, as it reminded me of the dream I had last night. Her laughter commonplace and her smile dazzlingly white.

I responded to her by laughing as well, making sure it was believable before returning to comforting silence.

Eventually, Papyrus called for both of us to eat dinner. Overall, it wasn't too bad tonight. It was indeed edible. Umbra made no complaints though, as she wolfed down the food regardless of taste. It made me curious, as most visibly were sick at Papyrus' spaghetti, even though Papyrus could never tell that his pasta wasn't _that_ good.

As we finished the food, we all went to the couch to watch Mettaton's show. The best show in the Underground, not that it had any competition as it was the _only_ show in the Underground. As soon as Papyrus turned that shit on I could tell I was going to fall asleep a couple of minutes in. I looked over to Umbra, and of course, she looked the same. Well, sleeping was indeed better than putting that shit through your brain.

I watched the show for a little bit, Papyrus' face was with glee as Mettaton cooked some food. Adding a rediculous and inedible amount of glitter into his cuisine. Eventually, I tuned out the show.

The echos of sleep were lulling me closer to its grasp. It took only a couple of minutes for me to enter that place in between sleep and consciousness. My last cognitive thought was of me being worried about taking Umbra to the library tomorrow as sleep's grasp tightened and pulled me into its abyss.


	10. The Library

It was one of those bright days in Snowdin. All of the snow on the ground and on the buildings turned into a blinding alabaster view. I found myself constantly squinting at the atrocious brilliance the snowfall caused. I sighed as I turned my head to see Sans not too keen on the dreadful light himself.

"What is it Umbra? Too bright for your dark soul to stand?" He commented with a cheeky smile.

I huffed and lightly hit the back of his skull.

"I noticed that you don't appreciate it either? Does that mean your soul is a miasma of depravity such as mine as well?" I responded with a raised eyebrow.

He shrugged with his hands up,

"Sorry for trying to help your atrocious somber soul from turning pure"

I snorted,

"The only thing this light could possibly do to me is make me blind."

"And not see me anymore? How dreadful" He said.

"Ah yes, if I was unable to see you anymore I could no longer receive provocative dreams of us slathering ourselves in ketchup, naked mind you, and proceeding to "wrestle"." I finger-quoted wrestle at him.

His face turned a bright shade of cyan and I proceeded to almost double over in laughter. I don't know why, but teasing him was one of my favorite activities now.

"Well I don't mind the slathering of ketchup on our bodies, but the "wrestling" will have to go." He said.

"Oh, so i'm not good enough for you hmm?" I questioned lightly.

"W-well... I didn't say that, i-it's" He continued stammering as I laughed out loud again.

"You make it too fun Sans" I told him.

He merely shoved his hands in his pockets and huffed loudly.

We then reached the entrance of the misspelled library. Unfortunately for me, I had to wear extra layers of clothing and keep my hood up and around my face. Sans told me as we were about to leave the house that some monsters remembered what humans looked like and we couldn't risk it. I agreed of course, avoiding confrontation was the best call to make.

"What would you like to start with?" Sans asked me as we sat down at a table.

I pondered for a moment, thinking of what would be the most efficient thing to learn about.

"Are there any books on government and the makings of it? More specifically how the government works and who resides as the most important figures?" I asked him.

He sighed as he scratched the back of his head.

"Honestly, monsters don't really keep an eye on those types of things. Considering that Asgore will live forever if someone doesn't commit regicide that is, there really is not a need to keep track of prominent figures. However, I can tell you some things if you ask." He answered.

"Well, who keeps track of gold. Is there a treasurer? What about generals that lead armies?" I asked. 

"Well, Asgore keeps track of gold and he also leads armies. However, the Royal Guard are trained in combat expertise and how to lead platoons. I guess you could say Undyne is a general of sorts. However, the only other thing I can think of are Royal Scientists." Sans sighed out Royal Scientists as if he hated the word.

"Tell me more about them." I asked.

He sighed once again as he continued,

"Royal Scientists are appointed officials where the main mission is figuring out how to get out of the Underground. Their secondary mission is to find out more about Human Souls." He shuddered softly and proceeded to continue,

"There are never too many Royal Scientists at a time because the research they do are considered... abominable to monsters. Mostly they research the soul and to research the soul you have to get one. Usually the work is painful to the participant if they are alive, which is fortunate to monsters as monster souls perish immediately after body death. Humans are not so lucky." He explained.

"How come Human Souls stay after death?"

He sighed softly as he shrugged,

"The most we know is that it has to do with Determination. Monster's simply don't have the capacity to really exhibit Determination as a trait without severe consequences."

"And those consequences are?" I asked.

"Monsters melt into an amalgamation of their physical forms and magical essence. Essentially becoming abominations of magic and physicality. It is... unpleasant to witness. We believe that Determination overpowers monsters because we are not used to such raw power the trait can give." He paused for a moment before deciding to let loose what information he was reluctant to keep.

"The reason Monsterkind lost the war was because we did not have the Determination to win. We don't have the capability to do it. Don't get me wrong, Monster's will protect each other and fight to stay alive. But the desire to take? To control? To keep going even though most would of given up? We don't have the means to." He finished.

"So is Determination the strongest trait to have then?" I asked.

Sans kind of went silent for a moment. Unsure of what to say.

"I don't believe one trait is the strongest nor is one the weakest. Each one has benefits and disadvantages. For example, Kindness is a wonderful thing. The desire to do no harm, to help those in need. Yet, sometimes being kind is the wrong option. Sometimes people just don't deserve kindness and need to be dealt retribution."

I sighed as a leaned back, thinking of what to ask next. Sans just stared at me silently, seemingly waiting. Souls were a interesting topic themselves. I could tell that the soul was one of the most important aspects of this world. It got me thinking back to Flowey, how he stared at my soul.

"Wait can other people pull your soul out without initiating a fight?" I asked.

His face lit up in blue again,

"Technically you can but usually you require trust in another to do it. Why do you ask?" He answered.

"Flowey took my soul out of my body and stared at it."

Sans reaction was immediate. The pure unadulterated rage his face and body displayed was overpowering. His left eye started lightly wisping blue and noticed his hands turned into rage clenched fists. I found myself weirdly delighted at it and also slightly scared at the same time.

"That is... the most unsettling and utterly fucking atrocious thing I think I have ever heard."

His voice was rage, it was not thundering or loud, it was the quiet rage. The one that would sound like a whisper if the pretenses were not there. It seemed so unlike Sans to be in a fury, so I took in the picture in its entirety. The rarest fruit was always the sweetest to behold.

"It did feel... wrong. When he did it." I said.

His head snapped up to mien and locked eyes with me.

"What that fucking disgusting degenerate did was basically rape." I flinched at the intensity of his voice and the way his eyes bore into my own. He blinked slowly and began to visibly calm down. His blue wisps of light in his left eye began to disparate and he began to relax.

"I'm sorry, but understand that to do what he did is one of the most despicable acts someone can do in our society."

I nodded slowly and looked away from Sans towards the right wall of the building.

"I didn't want to come here and make you distressed. If anything the main thing that I expected was for us to sit in relative silence while I gorge myself on all of this new shit that is happening to me."

San's features softened considerably,

"Don't think it's you're fault i'm not in the happiest mood right now."

"I know Sans, but its only polite for me to insinuate it is my fault because society dictates it." I said with a smile.

He smiled as well,

"Well I'm not one to assume, but you're not usually a follower of the formalities of society." He cheekily added.

"Yet I find myself thinking the same of you, I'm sure you got a few skeletons in your closet Sans." I said with a wink.

"Wow, you actually did it. I think I have fallen in love."

"Trust me Sans, it is without a doubt the last time I am ever doing that for you. I felt parts of my brain wither and die when I said that." I said with a groan.

"Are you saying I'm to _die_ for?" He said with a wiggle of his eyebrows, or at least where his eyebrows would be.

I groaned as I resisted the urge to slam my head into the table.

* * *

After the continuation of many unconsenting puns later I decided to gather some books that looked interesting and began to read. Sans also picked a book up, one on scientific theories that looked worse for wear. I asked where they got it and he said that there is a place where human garbage ends up and they take the useful things from there. It is why monster's knew a good amount of pop culture references and could somewhat keep up technologically with humans.

I then went to one of my own books, one about magic and how to use it.

**Magic and You**

_Magic is a somewhat difficult thing to explain. Most monsters would describe it as an almost unnoticeable buzz in the back of their mind. Each monster's magic is different, but can have similarities based on monster type and family. For example, the Royal Family have expertise over fire magic. However, all monsters can somewhat learn a few specific types of magic. For example, Healing magic. Healing magic can be learned by all monsters, but true expertise over healing magic comes from specific family trees. Healing magic is one of the easiest to use as it comes from an easy place to cast. Healing comes from happiness and joy. It is said happiness can cause all manner of ailments to disappear so it is no surprise that to use healing magic you must think of happy thoughts. An easy way to try and cast a healing spell is to remove an ache, be it a muscle ache or a headache. All that you must do is think of happy things and focus that buzz in the back of your mind on that specific ache in your body. Eventually, you will slowly feel that ache go away. I must warn you, if you are inexperienced with magic I ask that you have someone watch over you in case you overuse your magic stores._

I closed the book and set it down. I couldn't help but at least try to see if I had any capability to control magic. Sans and Toriel both did say there were human mages before, so there is a ever so small possibility that I could have the potential.

There was a small ache at the base of my spine so I focused as much as I could on that particular area. I relaxed as much as I could in the chair, I began to take deep breaths to control my breathing and just try to relax. After that, I just focused as much as I could. I sat there and tried to find that buzz the book talked about. Yet, I could find none. I continued searching for at least thirty minutes. My mind was clear of all thought as I just had one focus, to find that thing.

It was after that thirty minutes I finally decided that there was nothing there, but not being one to give up so easily I just decided to forgo trying to find the feeling in my head and try to heal using a happy memory and focusing intently.

Yet, at that, I came to a stop. Happiness was something I was not used to. I mostly knew pain, suffering, and hardship. I searched through most of my life and found nothing I felt suitable for the task. Then, more recent memories came forward. Sans.

When I thought of Sans it took an insufferable amount of energy to not smile. How comfortable I felt, how much of a great time I had with him. It was then I latched onto the memory of realizing I would no longer be alone. That I had a friend for the first time. I used it and focused on its inner workings as much as I could. Every minute detail that I forcefully stored into my memory as to why it made me happy. Then, I used it. I focused more than I had in my entire life to make the attempt to use magic. I sat there, completely oblivious to the world for at least an hour. Focusing on that one sore spot at the base of my spine, overflowing with one of the only memories that made me somewhat happy. It was at the end of that hour I found myself disappointed.

I sighed softly in defeat as I opened my eyes. I found myself looking at Sans who was staring at me intently.

"It didn't work." Was all I said.

He nodded softly,

"I wouldn't think too much on it, humans have basically all but lost the ability to control magic." He said.

"Why is that?" I asked.

"Well, I imagine that when we left they were not being exposed to magic as much. Also, it was already rare even all that time ago. I imagine it just faded out of memory at some point." He answered.

I still found myself somewhat upset that I was unable to. It was just so disappointing. To figure out that magic existed and realizing that you couldn't control it yourself? That has to be the worst feeling.

"What were you trying to do? Healing magic I suspect?" He asked me.

"Yeah, the book suggested to try healing an ache so I tried to heal the one in my lower back." I answered.

"I can try if you want. I am not that good at it but I can do something like that fairly easily." He said.

"Why?" I asked.

He shrugged softly,

"To see what it feels like?" He suggested.

I nodded,

"Okay."

I noticed him immediately relax,

"It should feel somewhat tingly." He said.

I nodded as I saw him lift his hand towards me. Suddenly the air around his hand turned to a deep yet soft green. Immediately I felt this wonderful feeling. I gasped as I felt joy and indeed a tingly feeling rush through me. It was mostly concentrated in my lower back but it was unmistakable that it was also throughout my whole body.

It was then the light slowly disappeared and he lowered his hand. The feeling went with it was we were returned to the realm of somewhat normality.

"That was.... otherworldly." I said.

"That is what most of the humans said whenever magic was used on them. I imagine for monsters that we are so used to it being apart of our bodies that the feeling is somewhat diluted." He said.

"I don't think you realize how cool it is to use magic in my perspective. It is only in fiction in my world. So to see it be a reality... it is astounding." I told him.

He chuckled softly, "I would imagine so. To think of never knowing magic existed, it is simply impossible to imagine." He added.

"Well whenever you get back to the surface you will bask in our normality." I said with a chuckle.

His smile faltered a little bit. I then realized that whenever he does get to the surface that I would almost certainly be dead. I ignored it and got up from the chair I was sitting in.

"Well it is getting dark out, I bet Papyrus has some food for us at home." I said as I motioned to the exit.

Sans then got up from his own chair and walked next to me. He leaned close to my ear, enough for me to be enveloped in his scent. I felt his breath hit my ear and I started to wonder how the hell does he need to breath before he interrupted my thoughts,

"First one back doesn't have to watch Mettaton tonight." He whispered.

He immediately took off towards the exit. I narrowed my eyes and accepted his challenge, chasing after him as fast as I could.

It was no surprise that I made it home first.


	11. The First

I sighed heavily, the cold air showing its form with my hot breath. It was awfully boring being a sentry as I would much rather spend my time with a certain human at home. Over the last days since the library, Umbra and I have been mostly just hanging out, relaxing, and on a few occasions went back to the misspelled library. Overall, a pleasant few days to be sure.

Of course, I have been keeping an eye-socket out for the fucking sorry excuse of a talking flora ever since Umbra revealed to me that he basically raped her. Umbra also didn't seem that bothered by it. Of course she said it felt wrong when he did it, but the lack of worry or lamentation over it was a cause for concern. I hope that the lack of worry was just her not being used to our society and not something far worse.

I cracked my phalanges as I studied the darkening sky. Fortunately, it was cloudy today and lightly snowing, so I wouldn't have to deal with that damned sun. The sky itself was beautiful, pinks and purples meshing together against a darkened blue. It made me wonder if the artificial sun created here felt similar to the one above ground. I think I will have to ask Umbra that very question once Greater Dog got here.

Being reminded of the sentries got the thought of Undyne coursing through my neurons. The day after Umbra and I went to the Library, which was two days ago, Undyne called a meeting between all the sentries. Apparently, someone had indeed spotted Umbra and now Undyne was on alert. Thoughts began coursing through my brain on who in particular could of ratted her out, and the only possibility was is that someone saw us during our trek to Snowdin. It set both Umbra and I on edge and we only went to the Library late at night if at all now. I also noticed that Umbra kept her knives on her at all times now. When I figured out that she had knives on her I wasn't surprised but a little unnerved since a certain demon I knew had a fetish for them.

I flinched as I heard large footsteps coming towards me, but when I opened my eyes I was just greeted by Greater Dog. His tail wagged as I went on my tip toes to pet him. He barked and decided to stand next to the sentry station as his armor wouldn't allow him to fit inside the small building. I began to walk away when Greater Dog barked and began to speak in not so great English.

"Undyne want to see you." was all the dog said as he began chasing after fallen snowflakes.

 _"If I had blood and skin I'm sure I would of turned bone white."_ I thought nervously.

As soon as I walked a few feet I began shortcut to Undyne's house.

I landed right in front of the fish shaped house, the ridiculousness of the house always irked me as the woman that lived in it was sort of bloodthirsty. I walked up to the door and knocked a few times. I pushed my hands into my hoodie pockets as I waited for the fish woman to greet me.

It took a about thirty seconds for Undyne to open the door. Her armor was absent but I was almost certain she had a weapon on her somewhere. However, as much as I was nervous I did what I did best. Act like I could give less of a fuck.

"Sans, I need to talk with you." Undyne said bluntly.

I internally rolled my eyes as she stepped aside and allowed me into her home.

"Oh I didn't know, I thought when Greater Dog said you had to talk with me he meant that I had to talk with Papyrus." I said.

Undyne barked out a harsh laugh as we sat down at the table that had a suspicious amount of cuts into it.

"Thanks for making me laugh. As you know, we have spotted a human. We believe it's a female but we are unsure of how old it is." Undyne informed.

I held back a growl as Undyne referred to Umbra as an it.

"But what we do know is that no deaths have been reported yet and we don't think it has gone further than Snowdin. So I need you to keep an eye-socket out. I will be going out to Snowdin tomorrow and checking around, I expect Papyrus to show me his cooking skills, I need to see if he has been practicing." Undyne said with a grin.

 _"Fuck."_ was all I thought.

My mind raced as I automatically answered her, even I didn't know what I was saying as I internally started panicking.

"Alright that is all, I'll see you tomorrow and let's hope this ends quickly." Undyne finished as she got up from the table to let me go.

I followed her and said bye as she closed the door behind me. I quickly teleported to my house and thanked whatever gods were out there that Umbra was on the couch.

"Umbra, Undyne is coming to Snowdin tomorrow and shes going to be in the house." I said with a surprising amount of calm in my voice.

All Umbra did was stare at me, her eyes narrowed as she looked at me, seemingly thinking of something.

"You are panicking, sit down for a moment." She said calmly.

"What do you mean sit down Umbra, Undyne will literally fucking kill you if we don't get you somewhere safe." I responded.

The facade of calm left me instantly as I started thinking of the horrendous things Umbra might go through if Undyne gets her.

It was then I felt a hand touch my shoulder, it tore me away from my thoughts as I looked at who touched me.

Yet again I found myself locked and unable to move as those piercing blue eyes stared into my own.

"We have the rest of the night to worry about it, but at this moment you are not thinking clearly. To act and make sure nothing happens we must think with a clear mind. Trust me I am also freaking the fuck out right now, but I know that the only way we are going to succeed is to think precisely." She said.

I could hear no uncertainty in her voice. I almost doubted that she was freaking out as she said, but I knew better. I knew that she had such an easy control of what she presented that me doubting her was what she wanted.

It was then I leaned forward and hugged her. I knew that one day the Royal Guard would find out. I knew one day that Umbra would have to fight for her life. I knew one day I would die protecting her from Asgore. But today nor tomorrow would be that day if it was the last thing I would do. And so, to comfort myself and to ground myself I hugged her. I let her scent wash over me, a light rain on what would be a bright day. A calamity in the midst of serenity. I held her close because to lose her would mean the lose everything.

When I felt her hug me back I held on even tighter.

"I cannot lose you." I whispered.

"Nor I you." Was the response I got.

I felt my soul clench and tighten. It was made apparent to me that I would never be able to forget this women. I would never be able to let her go. Willingly or not she had clawed her way into my life and now was stuck here.

And I wouldn't have it any other way.

* * *

Sans and I both sat on the couch in relative silence for about ten minutes. Papyrus was in the kitchen, having left his bedroom after San's and I talked. I watched San's out of the corner of my eye, he was visibly relaxing more and more by the minute. Internally, I felt both relaxed and nervous. Mostly I just forced my nervousness down and practiced taking deep breaths. The primal part of me was begging to flee but I knew that being patient and being calm was the correct choice.

"Okay, I'm as calm as I can possibly be." Sans said quietly.

I sighed as I looked at him in full. Overall, his body language read calm, but the twitch of his fingers every so often and his roaming eyes said he was still nervous.

"Alright, so whats the plan?" I said.

He was quiet for a moment, obviously thinking.

"Well, first things first we have to tell Papyrus. We can't have him accidentally mentioning you." Sans said while looking toward the kitchen.

"Yeah okay, let's get that out of the way." I responded.

We got up and walked to the kitchen in silence. The only noise was our footsteps and Papyrus moving pots and pans in the kitchen. Papyrus noticed us as soon as we were in his line of sight, smiling big.

"AH SANS, NICE TO SEE YOU HOME! DINNER IS ALMOST DONE!" Papyrus said brightly.

"We have something important to tell you Papyrus, this is serious." Sans said quietly.

Immediately, Papyrus' smile turned to a small frown.

"Undyne knows that a human is here, and will be coming to Snowdin to look around. She will be coming into our house to see you, so we need to move Umbra away for the day. We need to make sure not to mention her at all."

Sans' voice was deathly quiet. His tone was chilling and I almost wanted to shiver because of it.

"Alright Sans, you can count on me."

I almost wanted to see who else was in the house but it was then I noticed that it was Papyrus that just said that. His voice wasn't loud, if anything it was quiet and serious. I was absolutely baffled.

"Okay, we are going to start packing some stuff for Umbra soon, some food, a sleeping bag, and some water most likely. I'm not going to be back until tomorrow morning to meet with Undyne." Sans said.

Papyrus nodded softly and returned to the food he was making. Sans then motioned me to follow him.

"The safest place from Undyne is Hotland, but we won't be dealing exclusively with Undyne. Hotland has a lot of dangerous people there. The Royal Scientist lives there and a good amount of Royal Guardsmen. Most importantly, Mettaton lives there." Sans told me.

I looked at him questioningly at him mentioning Mettaton. He chuckled without humor,

"Mettaton was created with a multitude of human hunting mechanics. He is probably the third most dangerous person in the Underground for you."

I nodded softly as we both stood in the middle of the living room.

"So I was thinking of just hiding you in Waterfall. There are significantly less Royal Guardsmen there and less Monsters in general. The problem is that Undyne lives in Waterfall. However, she will be in Snowdin so I think it will be fine." He informed.

I sighed as I thought about it as well. No matter what there is a chance we do get caught. However, there is significantly less of a chance in Waterfall.

"Alright, I agree. Where at in Waterfall?"

"Well I was thinking about sleeping at my personal sentry station in Waterfall, and then moving you someplace else." Sans said.

"Alright, lets get packing. I'm starting to get tired, even though I don't think i'll be able to sleep." I said morosely. Sans nodded solemnly as we began to pack.

* * *

It took about an hour to get ready to leave. I decided to go ahead and take a shower and change my clothes before leaving. I once again found myself staring into the mirror. Yet, all I found was a slightly nervous girl. I sighed as I dried off and put on some clothes. I decided that in case I do get caught I needed to be tactful about my choices. I just wore some form fitting clothing and my combat boots. I didn't want someone grabbing onto loose clothing and getting me that way. If anything the only thing that was loose was a light water resistance jacket Sans gave me. He said that the water in Waterfall wasn't just for looks. I then looked at the knives I placed on the sink. I grabbed my shorter knife and put it in my right boot and placed the longer one in the right pocket on the inside of the jacket. I then checked my nails, fortunately I have not been biting them a lot lately and they were long enough to do damage in case I had to.

I took a deep breath as I readied myself to step out of the bathroom. I walked up to the mezzanine and peered over to look at Sans sitting on the couch. He looked up at me and gave a small wave. I then walked down the stairs and nodded softly at him, signaling I was ready to go.

Papyrus then came into the living room and looked at me with sadness and worry.

"HUMAN, I WISH YOU LUCK! KNOW THAT I WILL TAKE YOUR SECRET TO THE GRAVE!" Papyrus said sort of loudly, but not as loud as he normally is.

I nodded at him softly,

"Thanks Papyrus." I said simply.

Sans then got up from the couch and handed me my backpack. He then looked to his brother,

"I'll be back in the morning Pap, stay safe." Sans said with a sad smile.

Sans then looked at me and held out his hand. I looked at him quizzically, not understanding what he meant with that.

"Oh right, you haven't taken a shortcut before. You just have to hold on to me and not let go under any circumstance. It will feel like a tugging sensation and then it will turn to a falling sensation before we land at the spot." He informed me.

"Okay." Was all I said as I closed the distance between us a locked arm into his own. Sans then turned and closed his other arm around my back as he held me in a makeshift hug.

"Don't let go." He whispered.

I only began to understand the double entendre as I felt the absolute worse feeling I have ever felt in my life. It was as if my atoms were being rearranged, as if they were coming apart and being forced back into place. Then I felt my soul being tugged and squeezed, as if it was being crushed. Then, after that feeling subsided I felt as if I jumped off a cliff and I was falling endlessly. Then it stopped abruptly, as if I was forced into a screeching halt.

"We are here." I heard Sans' voice quietly.

I then pushed myself from him and dry heaved. It was as if my body was rejecting whatever fucking thing I just experienced. Fortunately, I somehow managed to not throw up as I looked back up at Sans. He looked worriedly at me and began to walk towards me.

"Shit I'm sorry. I knew you might of felt off from it but not this bad." Sans said comfortingly.

"It's okay... j-just give me a second." I said in between breaths as I lowered myself to the floor.

It was then I noticed the ceiling. It had blue star-like lights against the stone.

"Oh." Was all I said as I studied the beauty before me. Sans sat next to me as he also looked at the ceiling with me.

"Yeah, it is beautiful. Yet, I find myself wondering what true stars look like. The make-shift sky in Snowdin lacks star's and a moon if I'm not mistaken." San's said.

"Yeah I also noticed that there isn't really a Sun anywhere, just horrendous bright light as if there is one." I responded.

Sans chuckled as he continued looking at the blue stars.

"The night on the Surface was one of the few things I enjoyed. Bright lights far away, although quite solemnly, most of them were probably no longer in existence." I said as I looked to Sans.

"They are truly beautiful to behold. I always found myself amongst nature, away from humanity. Nature is simply that, no ulterior motive, no tricks or lies. It is simply in existence and you know the rules. Humanity has no true rules, it is tricky, it lies, it has motives. So when I went into nature I could take a break of being in control, of tricking and deceiving, of making those that hated me fear me." I explained to him.

He simply looked at me, no emotion on his face as I continued,

"I found out early it was better to be feared than to be perceiving as weak and inferior. I was not liked, I was not looked up to, and I was not loved. I was either feared by others, or there were people that were not taught to fear me."

I paused for a moment before deciding that I probably needed to explain that more,

"Trust me when I say that I did not enjoy hurting people Sans. At least it was not enjoyable that I had to do it. I enjoyed the fact that it was one less person that could hurt me. I enjoyed the control it gave me but I did not enjoy the fact I had to do it."

I searched his face and still found nothing. So I looked away from him and looked back up to the luminescent ceiling.

"It's okay Umbra, I understand." I heard Sans say quietly.

It's okay. I understand. Such strange words. Most would be terrified at that information, yet here I am being defied. Usually I found myself hating not knowing what will happen, not knowing how to control something so I could make sure I couldn't get hurt. Yet, with Sans I enjoyed it. Because I knew deep down that he wouldn't hurt me.

I looked towards him once again to find him staring at me intently. I smiled softly at him and stood up. He followed suit and stood up as well. I turned around to see what was behind me and I flinched at what I found.

Again I found myself face to face with another golden star. It twinkled softly in the cave, as if it was trying to pull me towards it.

"What is it?" I heard Sans ask worriedly.

"It's another one of those golden stars." I replied.

I could hear his clothes rustle as he flinched. I looked to him and noticed he looked even more worried now. I stared into his eyes and I searched intently.

"I can't tell you what they are yet. But trust me when I say that they are good for you specifically. There are reasons why I can't tell you, I ask that you trust me. Just know that if you do find them, then you should touch them as often as you can." He said softly.

I kept looking at him, still searching. I found myself satisfied as his body language read that he was being honest.

I nodded softly and walked towards the star. As I held out my hand and touched it I felt the same feeling as before yet slightly different. I felt a sort of... returning feeling in my soul, like a small tiny piece was coming back, before I felt like a tiny piece went into the star.

I stepped back sharply, feeling slightly worried about what I was doing but Sans saying I should touch them conflicted that.

In the end I chose trusting Sans and felt myself relax.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, it's just kind of weird. Like a piece of my soul is attaching to the star." I responded.

Sans narrowed his eyes softly before looking at the spot I touched the star at.

"It makes sense. Trust me when I say that finding out what they are for is going to be a terrible experience." He said solemnly.

I stared at him before nodding. I was really curious about them and really wanted to push the issue but I doubt he was going to say anything. I sighed as I walked to the sentry station and sat in it.

"Sans, why the fuck is there ketchup in here?" I asked.

"Shit, don't worry about it." He said while walking over to take the bottle. As he took it he opened the cap and proceeded to dump at least a cup of ketchup into the void that was his mouth.

"Look man, I like ketchup don't get me wrong. But that shit is disgusting." I said with a grimace on my face.

"Don't knock it till you try it." Sans said with a wink.

"I don't think I ever will, thank you." I responded.

Sans chuckled softly before going into the sentry station himself and sitting next to me.

"Brings me back to the old days, sitting in sentry stations and sleeping in them. I'm glad we could re-experience this together." Sans said with a wink.

"If the old days are about a week ago then sure, Sans." I said with a sigh.

"Hey I consider anything old if they happened at least twelve hours ago." He said.

I chuckled softly as I found myself thinking somewhat of the same thing.

"Well I am going to try to sleep, I suggest you do too as you are going to have to trick a fish woman for an entire day." I said while thumping his shoulder.

Sans chuckled softly before giving me more room to somewhat lay comfortably. I propped my bag against the wall of the station as a makeshift pillow and began to relax.

"Night Sans." I said softly as I started drifting.

"Night Umbra." He said as soon as I found myself drifting into a surprisingly easy sleep.

* * *

I sighed as I released the magic I placed on Umbra. I felt sort of guilty, but I felt as if she wouldn't of been able to sleep without my help. I leaned back and watched her sides expand with breaths. It felt creepy watching her like this but I also enjoyed the fact that she looked so peaceful. She never looked at ease when she was awake. She was always tense, as if ready to react to anything. It felt good to know she was somewhat relaxed, even if it was during unconsciousness.

I leaned back as well, deciding that sleep was the best option here. I let the soft blue magic fall over me. I made it strong enough to just fall asleep, but I wont stay asleep if I hear anything. I stared up at the ceiling, staring upon the bioluminescent stars as sleep slowly came to me. Eventually, darkness came over me and I found myself dreaming.

Dreams were always weird with me. I often found myself killing the small boy over and over, or seeing Papyrus' dust scattering to the wind. Yet lately I sometimes found the beautiful, black-haired woman laughing with me.

She was laying next to me, pointing at the stars that littered the night sky. My mindscape conjured an image of what I believed stars to look like. Mostly white pin-points, some small and some larger. Some glowed a slight blue or red, and some were so faint that they were almost invisible. Yet, throughout the stars there was a faint multicolored glow. Like someone brushed transparent paint over the sky and painted the stars on top. It was pink, red, light blue, and purple. I knew it to be nebulae and interstellar clouds and found it extraordinarily beautiful. I hoped one day to experience it for real with Umbra one day. I did not want to gaze at the night sky through pictures and descriptions, I wanted to gaze with my own eyes. When I looked over to my right I saw her looking at me. I stared into those beautiful eyes that held my soul in place. That pierced through my very being.

I reached over to her and when my phalanges almost grazed her cheek she let out a groan. I looked down and noticed glowing blue spears sticking out of her body. Bones were visible, stark white against the pink and red of muscle and blood. She whimpered softly as I looked into her eyes, and tears grazed her cheeks as her pained groans reached my ears. I couldn't speak, I couldn't move. I watched the life leave her eyes, the brightness of life within them fading into nothing as her last breath left her.

* * *

I awoke with a groan. My neck and back felt awful and hurt almost everywhere. I opened my eyes to see Sans not with me, and I quickly got up to look around. I found him staring at a small blue flower in the corner of the room that I had seemed to miss last night.

"Hey Sans." I said sleepily.

He flinched and looked startled when I spoke, but immediately relaxed. He walked over to me with his hands in his hoodie pockets,

"Hey, I was about to wake you up. It's about time for me to head back to the house." He said.

I nodded and proceeded to walk over to the cliff that housed a sprawling cave lake.

"Damn I didn't notice barely any of this shit last night." I said.

"Well it was dark and it was late, I don't blame you." Sans said.

I smiled at him and looked up at the blue star-like lights.

"They are still quite bright even though there is some more light in here." I told Sans.

He looked up at them as well, but I noticed his eyes looked sad as he did.

"Yeah." He said softly.

"Whats wrong, Sans?" I asked.

He looked at me with a mix of fear and sadness in his eyes.

"I just don't want you to get hurt, Umbra." He said quietly.

I walked up to him and hugged him tightly. Not daring to let go just yet.

"Sans, everything will be alright. I promise." I whispered into his chest.

He let out a deep breath that he was seemingly holding in. I felt his arms wrap softly around the middle of my back.

"Well, as long as you promise." He said.

I chuckled softly as I left our embrace.

"Alright, now get going. You got a fish lady to hoodwink." I said with a wink.

"Didn't you say you wouldn't do anymore puns, Umbra." He said smiling.

"Only for you." I said.

"Now get going." I said with a smile.

He chuckled softly as he stepped backwards a good few feet. We stared at each other for a few moments, but that's when I remembered that he was supposed to move me somewhere else.

"San's wai-" I began to say.

Sans' face morphed into one of pure terror as he looked at me... no behind me.

It was only through reflexes honed through years of fighting for my life that I did not die in that moment.

I moved to the right as much as I could in that situation. I felt something unnaturally sharp dip deeply into my left shoulder. No sound left me as my body immediately produced enough adrenaline to kill an elephant. I took my knife hidden in my jacket and spun around to try and fucking kill whatever it was that attacked me. I heard skin and muscle rip as I caught whatever it was in the right bicep.

"Fucking bitch!" I heard a raspy feminine voice scream as I backpedaled to access the situation.

It was a giant fish woman that looked fucking pissed.

"Undyne stop!" I heard Sans scream with an unnaturally sounding amount of fear and anguish.

It was at that moment, the moment where I focused a little too much on Sans, that I fucked up.

Undyne moved with with a speed that was not human, and grabbed me by the throat.

"With your death, you free monster-kind. Be glad that you will redeem your kind for at least a moment before we wage war." She said with enough venom to kill.

I spat in her face. She flinched and closed her eyes, and as she was distracted I reached into my boot to grab the smaller knife I had and I buried it deep into her trapezius muscle with a feral growl. She barely flinched. It was then Undyne and I were thrown into the wall by an unknown force. I looked up to see Sans running towards me trying his damnedest to reach me.

He stopped abruptly as he let out the most anguish filled scream I have ever heard another living being produced. Why would he scream like that. It was then I noticed a soft blue glow near my navel. I looked down to see three brightly glowing spears piercing my stomach.

* * *

No no no no no. I watched Umbra look down at the glowing spears that pierced her stomach. Gore coated the spears as her intestines spilled onto the ground in blood coated pink tubes. I saw parts of her ribs broken off into her intercostal muscles, and she merely looked down in fascination. She looked back up and looked at me for the first time in true unadulterated fear.

I screamed as I barraged Undyne with hundreds of blasters. She moved quickly, but a few grazed her skin as she hissed out in pain.

"Sans you fucking traitor!" She growled out vehemently.

She stabbed out with a spear towards me but I quickly sidestepped and pushed her into the ceiling before slamming her down onto the ground. I heard a sickening crunch as multiple bones in her body broke. I kept doing it. Each time I heard chilling crunches as bones tore into her muscles and pierced her skin. Blood and gore coated the ground as her body was bent and broken into terrible shapes. Eventually after about a dozen times, she hit the ground a final time and turned into dust.

I ran forward and dropped to my knees in front of Umbra.

"I-i- couldn't blast her with you two so close together. Umbra please don't... You promised." I quietly whispered in tearful gasps.

Surprisingly she was still on her knees, of course she was, she was the strongest person I knew. She looked up into my eyes and tried to speak. All that left her mouth was a terrible whimper and blood.

It seemed the adrenaline was wearing off.

She started heavily crying as she moaned and whimpered in pain.

"Sans it hurts." She said in a terrible cry.

"I know darling, I know. Just stay with me, please." I began to let soft green magic wash over her.

It wasn't enough. I wasn't enough. The most I could do was heal a few of her ribs, the damage was too much.

She shook heavily, as her sounds began to fade softly. She slowly started to fall over, so I grabbed her as gently as I could and lay her on her back. Her pink intestines moved with her over her stomach and she cried out again in anguish.

"I'm sorry darling. I'm sorry. Don't leave me please. I need you." I cried out as ugly tears dropped from my face.

"Sans I don't want to die. Sans it hurts make it stop Sans please make it stop. Make it go away please." She cried out. The sounds she was making was chilling. Her voice made my soul feel as if it was tearing in two.

Her breaths that were shallow and quick started to become softer. Blood coated my body as I tried my best to keep healing her. It was hot and sticking to me as I felt her start fading.

"Keep your eyes open darling, come on, stay with me." I coo'd softly at her.

"Sans..." she said softly.

I looked up at her beautiful face. She reached towards me with her right hand. I grabbed it with my own two and held on tightly. Her hand was so cold. It chilled me and it was then I made the terrible realization that she was going to die.

"No, no please don't. Please don't." I said quietly.

Blood started to stream from her nose down to her cheeks. She opened her mouth but all that came out was a small, terrible squeak as her head softly lulled and her eyes became dull.

"No darling, come on stay awake. Come on it's okay, its going to be okay." I said softly.

All I was met with was a chilling silence.

I cried out in anguish as I grabbed onto her body and pulled her close to mine. You promised Umbra. You promised. You promised. You promised.

I cried into her hair as her usual scent faded into one of coppery blood.

Please stay. Please stay. Please stay.

Nothing came from her.

Come on darling, come back to me. You promised, come back.

But nobody came.


	12. Somnus

I held her close still. Her body was unbelievably cold and the usual uncontrollable movements of being alive were no longer there. I pulled back and looked upon her lax face, and on seeing the lifeless color I cried even harder.

Why was my family skilled only in void magic? Why not healing? I could of saved her...

I made the most ugly sounds as I cried my heart and soul into the air. The ragged breaths I took pained me more than any wound I ever sustained.

It took an indiscernible amount of time for me to calm down to the point of cognitive thoughts. I realized that she would come back soon. She had enough determination to see the stars, so she would come back right?

I lay her body on the ground once again as began to weave and sew her body with magic. If only you could close up a body to save it, that I could do. What I could not do was intricately close up internal wounds I could not see.

It took about thirty minutes to completely close up her body. I looked upon her and noticed that she was completely peaceful. I knew then, that even in her sleep she looked somewhat poised and ready. In death she was completely serene. Ragged tears and breaths came out as I gazed on her lifeless form. What were her last words?

Sans...

I cried even harder then. Her last words were my name, she called out to me most likely knowing that she was in her final moments. I lamented as I prepared for the world to cease. For matter to dissipate and my atoms to be rearranged into a different timeline.

I waited.... and waited....

Yet there was nothing.

I began to panic. My breaths coming in ceaseless abandon as anxiety took over any rational thought.

No no no no no.

Why weren't we back yet? We should of went back by now!

I lost control. Even though I knew I was never in control to begin with.

"Darling... come on. Come back, lets go back...." I cried out in a raspy defeated voice.

Silence.

I got up on shaky legs and walked over to where she said the star was.

"Come on!" I screamed in a pitchy terrible voice.

"The one time I actually want you to bring someone back and you don't do it! Is this revenge?! Bring her back to me! Make me feel alive! Please I'll do anything, I don't want to live my life like this!" I screamed louder and louder until my voice broke.

I fell to my knees in front of where the star should be,

"Bring her back...." I said defeated.

The chilling silence mocked me endlessly. As if it was laughing at my attempts. So... I cried. I lamented. I screamed and tore and destroyed. I could smell sizzling as blasters tore apart the cave, I could feel tiny pebbles touch my bones as gravity was thrown out of the equation. I destroyed to at least find some meager satisfaction. Yet, when I gazed upon the destroyed cave that once housed beauty I screamed and beat myself with my fists.

I quickly turned to look for Umbra. I found her in the same place, the area around her still in perfection. As if a barrier was erected as I unleashed my rage and sadness into the air.

It was in that moment... I gave up. I stopped trying. I lost hope.

I stood up slowly, and walked what seemed like miles even though it was only a few feet, to her body.

"Let's go home, huh? Let's watch the world descend into madness." I said softly as I lifted her body into my arms. I looked upon her face one more time, the deathly white color of her skin in contrast to the black of her blood matted hair.

I looked away and teleported back home to await the calamity that was soon to come.

* * *

I was tense to say the least. Each minute that passed I feared the worst for my brother. Of course he would be fine though! My brother always made things right!

So with a renewed smile on my face I waited still.

An hour passed. Undyne should of been here a long time ago. Sans should have been here long before that. Worry started to seep deep inside of me. Like a small parasite that was worming its way into my soul.

I started to pace back and forth in the living room as I had nothing else to do to pass the time.

Another thirty minutes went by in silence. The only thing that pierced the silence's screams were my own footsteps, muffled against the carpet.

It was then I heard a pop behind me. I turned and smiled brightly at Sans,

"SANS YOU HAD ME WOR-" I started.

I looked down and saw the human limp in his arms. Her skin an ugly deathly pallor. Her hair was matted by some dark sticky substance and her clothes were ripped in multiple places on her stomach. However, the most important detail was how Sans was covered in blood and dust, and how the human did not breath.

"Pap..."

Sans' voice was like a lost wraith had been given the ability to speak. I feared that he would Fall at any moment, with how hopeless he was.

"Sans..." I responded quietly.

I honestly did not know what to say. I did not know what to do. My mind did not want to believe she was dead, to accept she was dead was to accept I was looking at her dead body. It was absolutely traumatizing, yet I could not scream, cry, or look away.

"Pap... Undyne killed her. I killed Undyne...." Sans added in his lost voice.

I flinched at his confession. And looked upon his face with a sad expression. His cheeks were stained light blue, and every so often tears would fall. There was no lamentation in his tears, it was as if his body was not able to produce the sounds signifying sadness.

"She won't come back Pap... she's supposed to come back..." Sans' broken voice almost made me want to cry with him.

"Sans..." I started, but did not finish.

I was unable to tell him that it was not possible for her to come back at this point. She was... gone.

"Sans we need to bury her." I said gently.

"But why Pap? She needs to come back..." Sans said in a deathly chill voice.

"Sans. You know she won't." I said gently but with more force this time.

I couldn't let my brother be consumed with this maddening sadness.

Sans crying intensified. I knew he understood, but he simply did not want to accept it.

"I know bro... I know." Sans said.

I went over to my brother and hugged him tightly without disturbing the small human girl in his arms.

"Why did Undyne not take the River Person, Pap?" Sans asked in a broken, pitchy voice.

"Why did she have to walk all the way, Pap?"

"Umbra, was going to remind me to teleport her to safety, Pap. But then Undyne appeared behind her and almost chopped her head off." Sans explained.

I let him keep talking, not interrupting or letting go of him.

"I couldn't blast her with them so close together, I couldn't teleport her out because I can't teleport under extreme stress without risking losing limbs, I couldn't control gravity that expertly to remove them from each other. The most I could do was slam them both into a wall and hope I wouldn't hurt Umbra."

Sans' crying began to increase in calamity. His ragged breaths tore through the silent air as he relived his experience.

"When I did that I started running towards Umbra, trying to at least throw her from Undyne and sacrifice myself so she could get away.... But I was too late. I saw Undyne stick her with three spears. Pap... She looked terrified...."

I was chilled. It was then I noticed the soft orange glow of tears streaming down my cheeks onto Sans' blood stained jacket.

So I blasted Undyne, she moved so quick Pap. So I grabbed her with gravity and slammed her up and down from the ceiling to the floor. I could hear her bones break Pap, it was the most satisfying sound I have ever heard. I wanted Undyne to be in so much pain, I wanted her to regret ever living Pap."

I wanted to gag and scream, but I was too terrified to move or talk.

"When she dusted, Umbra was still alive. She was begging me to save her Pap, begging me to make it stop hurting. I tried, but she was disemboweled, Pap. There was so much blood. She made these awful sounds, Pap."

I cried my silent tears of fear and sadness as Sans' maddening voice kept going.

"You know what her last words were, Pap?"

His voice was eerily silent after that. Thinking he was expecting an answer I shook my head no against his neck.

"Sans..."

I was in a nightmare. This had to be some terrible nightmare that I would wake up from. There was no way this was happening. I would wake up and Sans would be right there, comforting me like he always had.

Nothing...

I stepped out of the hug and looked at Sans' face. His eyelights were no longer there. An endless void of black as Sans looked on at nothing.

I wanted to run and scream and cry. Yet I was frozen.

"Sans, we need to bury her." I said in the most calm voice I could muster.

Sans' eyelights came back as he stared at me with this lost expression.

"Okay..." Sans said with no emotion.

And so we teleported. Ending up in Waterfall under a brilliant display of blue star-like lights.

It took a while for Sans to bury Umbra. Seemingly unwilling to let her go. He stared at the human sized hole I made with such a lost expression on his face for at least thirty minutes. Eventually, he did it without my interference.

He set her down so gently, like she was glass. He then pulled a blue flower out of his pocket and placed it next to her grave. He leaned close, almost touching the flower with his face.

"Umbra..." I heard him whisper.

"Umbra... Umbra.... Umbra...." a small detached voice whispered back.

And so, Sans stepped back as I lowered dirt onto the grave. He watched as her body was covered with dirt silently. When I placed the last of the dirt he let out the most awful anguish-filled scream I ever heard.

* * *

I do not know how long I sat in my room for. All I know is that I would pass out sometimes without wanting to sleep and suddenly wake up confused. I would then cry as I was reminded that Umbra was not here anymore.

Pap would sometimes come in my room. Bringing me my favorite foods, yet I would always let them rot in a corner. Food was not a necessity.

Eventually, Papyrus would come in my room and say the entire Underground is in lock-down. That they figured out that Undyne was dead and killed by a human.

I merely huffed at him as I returned to my lamentation.

What seemed like years later, Papyrus said that Asgore wished to see me, saying he expected to see me within the hour. He then left the room, perhaps to allow me to get ready.

I wanted to get up, to kill that fucking goat man myself. Yet when I tried I fell to the ground without any strength. I screamed and cried as I lay on the floor. I beat my skull with my fists until I heard cracks. I looked at my hands to see multiple bones with sharp little cracks.

It was then I felt it, the feeling of falling.

I pulled my soul out quickly, true fear kicking into my body.

The upside down heart shape was the dullest blue, almost grey. The once yellow shimmer that permeated throughout it was an ugly washed out color. The cracks within them were much larger and there were more cracks forming every second.

I lay down and watched quietly as my soul started to shatter.

I smiled at the thought that I might be able to see Umbra again if the universe blessed us with an afterlife.

I watched as my soul shattered into thousands of tiny pieces and felt my body turn to dust.


	13. Exsomnus

I jerked up from where I was laying. I groaned as the ghosting's of pain erupted in my stomach and chest. I looked down to see I was completely fine, but the wraith-like experience of pain was still there. I looked around, expecting to see Sans somewhere yet all I saw was an infinite Stygian void.

It was then my brain was ravaged by the injection of memories.

I screamed into the infinite void as my brain was overwhelmed, and the recollection of what just happened to me was forcefully inserted into my consciousness.

After what felt like hours, the pain subsided as I cried into the inky darkness.

I died.

It was so painful, I could do nothing as I watched Sans destroy Undyne.

I choked out a solemn laugh as I remembered how her body was crushed under her own mass.

I mentally berated myself for getting so distracted by Sans. I was less worried for myself during the whole battle. All I cared about was making sure Sans wouldn't get killed by the vengeful fish woman.

I cried as I remembered Sans consoling me, begging me to stay alive even though I knew deep down I was going die. I could feel my blood choking me from the inside as it filled my lungs.

For the next thirty minutes I panicked and cried my heart out. I pulled at my hair as I called myself every name in the book, saying how worthless I was, saying how much of a mistake I was.

How could I let myself die?

I scratched my arms until they hurt and bled, I screamed out my anguish into the dark.

When I finally calmed down enough I looked down to see my arms were just fine.

I studied them curiously as silent tears fell from my eyes.

"Wait, how can I see my arms, there is no light?" I spoke quietly to myself.

It was as if my skin was the light source yet no glow came. I did not light any other object in the room of darkness I lay in.

It was then I heard this deep baritone voice that I had never heard before, 

"Don't lose hope!"

It was as if it was all around me, yet I knew the direction it came from. I looked over to my right and saw nothing, but I knew it was from over there.

I had this feeling though, that I could stay where I was.

This innate feeling came from within me that said it would be over if I just stayed. I could feel myself slowly slipping away and I knew if I stayed where I was I would pass peacefully.

I thought of Sans though. How he made my life so much better by just being there. I then noticed that I actually didn't want to die anymore. I even said so as I lay dying in the cave.

So I stood up and began walking to where I heard the voice.

"Stay Determined.... Don't lose hope!" The deep voice said constantly.

The voice grew louder and louder, as if it was speaking directly inside my head, until it stopped suddenly.

I came to a halt as I looked around, but nothing was different.

Then I looked toward my feet and noticed a very familiar looking golden star. I looked around, expecting someone or something to pop up, but nothing came.

I bent down to peer at the golden star, studying it more closely, yet found nothing too interesting about it.

I then reached out with my right hand to touch it, like twice before.

That was when I realized that I would experience a lot of multiple worst experiences of my life.

Like with Sans' teleportation, I could feel my very atoms be rearranged, except it was multiplied by at least a thousand.

I was turned inside out, pulled, twisted, arranged and rearranged. Calamity, pandemonium, chaos, there was no order or serenity in this.

I did not struggle because there was no way for me to be able to. The only thing I could do was think.

And even that was ripped from me.

* * *

"You okay?"

I flinched as I heard his voice. I looked around to see I was in the cave where Sans' sentry station was. I looked up to see the same glowing blue stars on the cave ceiling. I sighed as I felt tears prick the corner of my eyes.

I'm back.

"No not really." I responded in a chill whisper.

"Why what's wrong?" Sans asked in worried voice.

I turned around and looked at him,

"I died." I said simply.

His face warped into one of fear before he groaned and held his head in his hands. I watched him for a few minutes, thinking that how he looked was probably how I looked when the memories came flooding back.

"Are you able to remember as well?" I asked.

"Yes, although not as much as you do." He said in a broken, tearful voice.

"Stars.." Was all he said as he started crying silently.

"Why did it take so long?" He asked softly.

"I don't know, it only felt like I was there for about two hours." I responded.

"Sans. I'm sorry." I said in a comforting voice as I went up to him and hugged him tightly.

He squeezed me in the tightest hug I had ever been in, and I found myself silently crying with him as we held each other in our arms.

"It's my fault... I should of remembered sooner so I could of gotten you out before Undyne came through. It's all my fault, please Umbra forgive me." Sans said in a choked voice.

"Sans don't you dare blame yourself. If anything it's on me as much as you." I said in my equally broken voice.

We stayed like that for what felt like hours, being comforted by just the tightness of how we held each other.

Eventually we left each others embrace and looked at our tear-tracked faces.

"What exactly do you remember?" I asked quietly.

His face scrunched up as he recounted his memories.

"Mostly pictures and emotions. All I know is that you tried to remind me to teleport you and Undyne showed up, then Undyne stabbed you, next I killed her and watched you die. The last thing I remember is a lot of time passing and I died."

"How did you die?" I questioned.

He looked to the ground in a mix of shame and sadness,

"Monsters can Fall. Meaning that if we experience enough sadness and loss of hope we can dust because of it." He explained.

"That's... that's awful." I said quietly as I returned us to another embrace.

"Did you really feel that hopeless because of my death?" I whispered into his jacket.

"When you didn't come back immediately I fell into a grief caused madness." He began.

"Umbra you are the light to my life. You have caused me to feel alive again, how else would I react to your supposed permanent death?" He finished.

I just sat their in silence as I took in his words. Do friends feel like this? Do they feel such an attachment? Such a feeling of wanton happiness?

I sat in silence as I forced those thoughts out of my head.

"I think I would feel the same." I automatically responded.

Ah stupid Umbra, do you the remember the last time this happened?

I silenced those thoughts immediately as I continued lying to myself.

"You are the only friend I have ever had, Sans. At least, you are the first to not pretend and use me for your own gain." I said to him as we once again exited the embrace.

"But it is for my own gain, you are the only thing that makes me truly happy now." He said with a small smile.

"Then lets say its a symbiotic relation and call it a day." I said returning his smile.

"So what's the plan now?" I continued.

Sans' brows furrowed as he thought.

"Well we can't stay here, that's for sure." He said.

"Wait, can you explain what the stars actually are now?" I asked.

Sans sighed deeply as he scratched the back of his head.

"Well, each human that has come down had specific powers in accordance to their soul's main trait. For example, the girl with a soul of Integrity could make people believe her instantly, without a doubt, as long as she was telling the truth." Sans explained.

"However, human's with a soul trait of Determination can interact with save points and came back to those points after death." He paused before adding, "As for my role in this, I don't know. I don't know why I can remember when it happens, but I can." He finished.

"So... does this happen forever now?" I questioned.

"I don't think so. We believe you can only come back a certain amount of times, depending on how much Determination you have." He explained.

"So I'm not immortal? Damn..." I said jokingly.

Sans chuckled without humor as he looked up towards the cave ceiling.

"After you died I completely destroyed this room." He said with a quiet voice.

"I don't blame you." I responded.

He looked towards me and simply stared with an unknown expression.

"Can I tell you something, Umbra?" Sans said in a far off voice.

"Of course." I replied softly.

He stared at me for a few more moments before returning back to the ceiling.

"I killed a human before." he stated in a chilling whisper.

I silently stared at him, seeing if he was going to continue.

"He was killing dozens of Monsters everyday. He slashed them with knives and looked on in a happy manic grin." He said.

Something stirred within me. Like I somehow knew, deep inside, why and how he looked.

"I still have nightmares of his broken body, torn asunder by bones and spears."

He looked towards me and bent his head down, averting his gaze from my own.

"Undyne said she was happy he was dead. That he deserved to die, that she liked how he died in a terrible, destroyed form."

I stayed silent, letting him continue,

"I found myself thinking the same at the time, that justice was served, that I was doing the right thing. But day after day I found myself disgusted with myself. I killed a small, little boy no older than 12." He said with a broken voice.

"Sans, I don't think I can ever judge you for anything." I said softly.

Indeed, while I heard him speak I felt nothing for the boy. Only sadness for Sans that it obviously hurt him a lot.

"Why?" Was all he asked.

"Because, I honestly don't care for that boy. Nor do I care for anyone else besides you. You could probably commit genocide and I wouldn't bat an eye." I confirmed.

He chuckled softly at a joke I knew nothing of.

"Is it wrong for me to think the same of you?" He said softly.

I smiled gently and took his right hand into my own.

"Perhaps that is why we are meant to stand together. Perhaps... it is why we have come to depend on one another." I said as I stared at his gathering of carpals and phalanges.

"I wouldn't have it any other way, Umbra." He responded as he pulled me into another long-lived embrace.

"So, when do we start planning for world domination and genocide?" I said jokingly.

"After we have finished tricking the mean fish lady." He said with a chuckle.

I laughed genuinely for the first time in what felt like forever.

"Have you only ever laughed for me?" He asked gently.

"Yes, only you." I confirmed.

We left the embrace and stood up together.

"Now we just have to hide you properly." Sans said with a sad smile.

"Where at?' I asked.

Sans hummed softly.

"Well, Hotland is still a no-go, but we can hide you very close to it. This was the place I was going to take you to, before the mean fish lady showed up." He said jokingly. I chuckled softly and nodded my head.

"It's the garbage dump, which barely anyone goes. We will hide you deep into the place that resembles your ugly, dumpster soul, and then I'll come get you after holding myself back from killing Undyne for hours." I said.

I hummed soflty,

"I wouldn't blame you for doing it." I said.

He chuckled as he held out his arm,

"Do you trust me?" He asked with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

"You hardly resemble Aladdin, Sans." I said with a groan.

He just kept wiggling his eyebrows as he held his pose.

"But yes, I do." I finally said with a smile.

I grabbed onto his arm as he turned it into a tight embrace.

"I'm glad you do." He whispered as I felt that terrible feeling of teleportation.

* * *

We landed pretty easily in the wet swamp of garbage.

"Damn Sans, it smells like your personality in here." Umbra said with a scrunched nose.

"Tsk tsk Umbra, manners or I'll leave you here forever." I threatened.

"Oh, I beg your pardon. I meant nothing by it." She said in a mock expression of being forgiving.

"Of course, of course." I said

Umbra looked around before setting her eyes on a somewhat clean, yet desolated couch.

"I think we found our bed." She said.

She moved from our embrace to the couch, I found myself almost reaching out to her retreating form, unwilling to let her go yet.

I mentally reprimanded myself as I followed her to the couch.

"You know I can make us go to sleep, if you want." I said.

She turned to look at me and cocked her head in a very bird-like manner.

"Oh?" Was all she said.

"Magic, I can make us fall asleep easier than it would be on our own. I also think we are going to need it." I said sadly.

She sighed as she looked to the ground then back to me,

"Yeah you are probably right." She said in a similar manner to myself.

We took our respective, opposite ends of the couch. We then got out the blanket we packed and laid it over our forms.

"Sans..." Umbra said softly.

"Yeah?" I responded.

"Thank you, for being here." She said simply.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

She paused for a moment before explaining further,

"Thank you, for being alive." She said.

My soul lurched and sang in happiness. I could almost imagine it was glowing throughout my body, but when I looked down I looked normal.

"Thank you too, Umbra." I responded.

She hummed softly as she turned over to her side.

I began to weave the calm blue magic over our forms, and immediately felt the effects as my eyes started drooping.

"Goodnight Sans."

"Goodnight Umbra."

* * *

_I heard giggling throughout my turmoil of dreams. I would see Sans turn to dust after being impaled by a glowing blue spear. I would see my own body torn asunder by all manner of attacks._

_But it was that constant of a small child's giggling that kept me somewhat grounded in reality._

_"I see you have used my power...." The child-like voice surrounded me._

_I didn't even look around as I answered her,_

_"Yes." I responded simply._

_"What did you think? You can keep trying new things in ceaseless abandon. If you mess up you can just jump off a cliff and try again. Isn't it great?" She said in a manic tone._

_"I'm sorry, but I am not a fan of dying, still." I said in a half-joking manner._

_She appeared before me, her chilling expression still igniting my flight response._

_"You know, you really like that skeleton." She said softly._

_"Yes, he's been my only friend throughout my whole life." I confirmed._

_"Oh, only a friend? How disappointing." She said with a disturbing smile._

_"Yes, only a friend." I reiterated._

_She began to walk around me, like a lion circling its prey._

_"Why are you in denial, Umbra? Just afraid it's going to end up like last time?" She said._

_This primal anger erupted from me as I looked her dead in the eyes with no fear,_

_"Shut. The. Fuck. Up." I said in a feral growl._

_She merely laughed as she pranced around my frozen body._

_"Poor little Umbra, thinking she was in love as she was used and tortured by that wo-"_

_I erupted in a primal scream as I tore through the frozen chains on my body. I had just one goal, to fucking **DESTROY** that child._

_I tackled the girl to the ground as I beat my fists into her face, and clawed her eyes out._

_She giggled as she turned to mist in my hands and reappeared next to me._

_"Yes... do more of that. It is so much more interesting than what you are doing now." She said gently, like a mother, into my ear._

_I then felt my neck prickle in pain as I saw the knife just touch my jugular. I felt a light well of blood trickle down my neck as I felt her cold breath tickle my ear._

_"I know you want to control everybody, Umbra. The loss of control is your greatest fear. So use my power, gain that control, and never be weak." She coo'd into my ear._

_My heart pounded so hard as she sang her song into my head._

_It would be so easy, wouldn't it? It was like a siren was singing it's wonderful song to me, and lulling me deeper to the ocean._

_Yet, I knew that she was tricking me. I knew that I wouldn't listen._

_"No." I said with a strong voice._

_"No?" She repeated back, like a question._

_I felt the knife dig deeper as she filleted my neck open._

_She put her index finger and thumb on my chin and forced me to look in her eyes,_

_"I enjoy it when the life leaves their eyes. I love the intimacy of this singular moment. Now die for me, sweet thing. Die and stay Determined."_

_And so I did just that._

_I died looking into her eyes defiantly as darkness swallowed me into its chaotic gullet._


	14. Retrospect

I awoke with a soft hum. The usual night terrors that haunted me were absent from last night, but I strangely dreamt of nothing.

I sighed as I propped myself up on my right elbow and saw Umbra fast asleep. A wonderful feeling of relief filled throughout my body at her sleeping form, however, it was quickly expunged and replaced with anxiety with my realization that I had to leave her to her own devices for hours today. I did not want to leave her alone so soon after her death, but I knew that I would be helping prevent another if I deceive Undyne.

Unfortunately, I could not remember everything that happened in the past timeline. I remembered only the important events, yet even those were cloudy. I laid back down as I thought long and hard about what exactly I remembered.

Basically, the entire night after she touched the star was lost. The only thing I remember before Undyne showed up was Umbra trying to remind me to teleport her. Then, the next thing was Umbra getting disemboweled. I shivered as I regrettably had a single mental image of her looking down in fascination at the bloody spears poking through her stomach. I knew I fought Undyne, but the only picture that I got from it was her turning to dust. I felt tears prick my eyes as I went to the only memory of Umbra dying.

I never remembered words, it never happened before. Yet somehow, with Umbra around, the impossible became possible.

"Sans..."

It was like my mind singled in on that one moment. I remembered absolutely everything in that one second time-frame. How the air felt on my bones, how her broken voice whimpered out my name. How her blood felt, hot and sticky. I remembered how she started to reach out to me with her right hand, as her left arm was ruined by Undyne's spear. Her trapezius and deltoid muscles were completely ravaged and destroyed. remembered how beautiful her face still was, even as she lay dying.

I frowned as I went the last thing I could remember. There was no picture or words this time, simply emotion. I felt sad, distraught, without hope. I felt the feeling that is associated with Falling. And then I felt no more.

I was ashamed that I let myself Fall. Yet, I understood why.

My brother used to be the anchor that kept me steady, his happiness would flow into me, and that still was there. However, I now know that I depend far more on Umbra than I do Papyrus now.

Papyrus is my little brother, we are bound by blood and family and I love him dearly.

However, as the saying goes: "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb."

I still felt guilty that I have started to rely on Umbra more than my brother. The want and desire to be around her and talk with her would sometimes come into conflict spending adequate time with Papyrus. But the feeling of my soul singing when around her. The utter happiness of simply being in her presence. The absolute understanding and similarities with shared with each other.

These are things that I have never felt before with another being.

I groaned as I realized that I probably should be going back home soon. I leaned up and decided to do something hilarious with Umbra.

With a cheeky grin I coated my index finger with my glowing blue saliva and as slow and as gently as I could I leaned over Umbra's sleeping form.

"Whatever you are planning to do, realize that I'll do it back but thousands of times worse." Her sleepy voice interrupted.

I flinched as she surprised me and cursed softly.

"How long have you been awake?" I asked as I wiped my finger off against my jacket.

"About a minute. What about you?" She returned.

"I think about fifteen minutes." I guessed.

I heard her groan as she leaned up into a sitting position. Her hair, once again, a complete and utter mess.

I could feel my grin getting wider and wider as I stared at the monstrosity that was on top of her head.

"Your hair looks like a cat's hairball." I said cheekily.

"And your personality makes this dump look like a beautiful sunset." She said as she glanced around at the layers of trash.

"That doesn't count, too similar to the one you said last night." I said while wagging my finger at her.

Her eyes narrowed as she stared at the intruding digit.

"If you don't get that shit out of my face I will break it off and ram it up your ass." She said coldly.

"Is that a promise?" I said waggling my eyebrows.

Her lips turned into a smirk that looked absolutely sinister.

"I can make it one..." She said in a oddly seductive voice that I did not expect from her.

"Wow you are way too good at that." I said as I fought off shivers.

Her bell-like laugh pierced the air, its pure sound so unlike anything you would expect from her.

"I try." She said after calming down.

I huffed as I got up from the couch and cracked my neck. With there being no skin, muscle, or fat in between my bones and the air, the cracks sounded like miniature gunshots.

"Jesus fuck Sans." Umbra cried out.

"Sorry." I apologized.

I looked around for a few moments, making sure that no one was here.

"I need to get going soon. I'm sure Undyne is already in Snowdin and is making her way to my house." I said as I looked towards Umbra.

She nodded, seemingly nonchalant, at me, however, I could see the sadness within her eyes.

"Trust me, I'm not a fan either. But we both know that this is the only way." I responded.

My soul was screaming to stay with her. To keep her safe, to try and have some semblance of control. Yet, the logical side of me was warring with the emotional, and I knew that most of the time it wins.

"Just don't kill her... at least not without me there." She grinned evilly at the thought and I found myself wondering how much pain she could actually cause someone.

"I promise." I said, returning the sinister smile.

She got up from the dilapidated couch and closed the distance between us.

I tightened as much as I could without hurting her. My soul was begging, pleading with me to say fuck it and stay here, but I held it down and accepted that we would have to stay apart for a couple of hours.

We separated and I saw her face turn to a soft sad tone. It turned to a thoughtful one, before replacing the sadness tenfold.

"Alright, now get going. You got a fish to hoodwink." She said with a sad wink.

I looked at her questioningly,

"Didn't you say you wouldn't do anymore puns, Umbra?" I said with a questioning smile.

She flinched hard. Like way more than was normal.

"Only for you..." Her voice barely even registered it was so quiet.

My soul lurched at her words, but I was worried for her. Why was she acting like this?

"Now get going." She said with a small, almost non-existent smile.

I took a few steps back, finding myself oddly experience deja vu. I looked at her in concern, worried as to why she was acting so weird.

I looked behind her, seeing nothing. No Undyne, no Asgore, no Mettaton.

"Um-"I started.

"Go, I'll be fine." She said in finality.

I believed her.

And so I locked her beautiful face in my gaze and gave a gentle smile as I popped out of existence.

* * *

Anxiety clawed and tore at me immediately as I landed at my house. The instant Umbra was not in my sight my heart and soul begged and pleaded with me to just go back. To make sure I could keep her safe. In reality, I knew that the last time I was with her when something bad happened I could do nothing to save her. The desire for me to be in control was always there, but every time I reached it slipped from my grasp.

"AH SANS, RIGHT ON TIME!" Papyrus brought me out of my self deprecating thoughts.

"Well, I would say I'm a little late." I responded.

Papyrus did his signature laugh,

"I ALWAYS EXPECT YOU TO BE, AT THE VERY LEAST, THIRTY MINUTES LATE TO EVERYTHING! SO TECHNICALLY YOU ARE RIGHT ON TIME!" He said awfully cheerful.

It was then we heard two, very hard, raps on the front door. I jumped slightly, as the anxiety already within me increased by, what it felt like, a thousand times.

"Open the door you numb-skulls!" I heard Undyne's raspy voice scream.

I'm sure in other circumstances that I would laugh at the pun, but all I felt was a mounting dread.

Papyrus walked cheerfully up to the door in large strides and opened it with a bright smile,

"HELLO UNDYNE!" Papyrus quite literally almost screamed.

"Ah Papyrus, how has the cooking been going!" Undyne said in a toothy smile.

"QUITE WELL, SANS HAS NO COMPLAINTS!" He said while looking at me.

Undyne turned to look at me and I was glad I did not posses an actual heart.

"Sup." I said lethargically.

"Sans, glad to see you again so soon!" Undyne said while walking up to me.

She leaned closer to me and whispered,

"No need for Papyrus to know about the breach, alright?" She said.

"Yeah, I haven't told him anything." I lied easily.

"Good." She whispered back as she leaned back and turned around to face Papyrus.

"Alright Papyrus, Sans and I need to do some things. We will be back in a few hours to test your cooking!" She said cheerfully.

"ALRIGHT! YOU TOO HAVE FUN!" Papyrus said with a bright smile. I looked at him as Undyne and I walked by him. He mouthed, "Stay safe." to me and I saw in his eyes how concerned he was. I looked away as I followed Undyne out of the house. We started walking to the entrance of Snowdin Village.

"Alright, there has been no other reports other than my source. He said the only features he got were the clothes it was wearing and that it was of of a medium build and relatively tall compared to the other humans that fell." Undyne informed me as I kept my rage in check.

"So no deaths?" I asked in faux concern.

"Not yet, but I wouldn't trust it. We know how easily humans can turn violent if given the chance. It's kill or capture on sight if your a higher up Guard and run on sight if your not." She added with anger in her voice.

I clenched my fists as we walked, not letting my anger get the best of me.

"Usually you have more to say. Thinking about something?" She asked.

"Yeah, just thinking about what soul trait it is." I said.

It took everything out of me to call Umbra an it but I forced it through.

"Yeah, that's the problem. I don't know why, but every human that came down had a different soul trait. So I'm thinking for this last one it might be Determination." She said.

I cursed internally, but the thinking side of me wondered why it was that each human that came down had a different one. It was way too coincidental to be an accident.

"Do we know what power Determination has?" I lied.

"No, and that is what is making me nervous. We don't know if it's attack based or speech based." She added.

_"Neither, technically." I thought to myself._

"Which one do you think was the worst to deal with power wise?" I deflected. 

"It's a tossup between Perseverance and Justice." She answered. "Justice was the worst for me. It found me "Un-Just." and I could do nothing to it. It took Asgore explaining the plight of the monster's and tricking it into thinking he was going to let it live for us to kill it." Undyne spat out. 

I remembered it all too well. Asgore was lying to her about letting her live, so she deemed Asgore "Just" and he killed her behind her back. At first she looked surprised when the trident pierced her, but then she just smiled.

"Now Perseverance knew what was going to happen in the future. So every time we tried to set up an ambush it was never there. Whenever it fought it knew exactly what you were going to do. It took months for us to finally kill it. We located where it was and put up guard posts around it's area and starved it out." She explained with a blood-thirsty tone.

I wasn't there for that one. I was just a kid when Perseverance came through the Underground. I remember the stories of Royal Guardsmen completely dumb-founded when they could not land a single blow on the kid. It was just impossible to do. I felt bad that he had to succumb to starvation, but it what better than what some of the other's went through. The guardsmen fully expected him to come out at one point, to look for food or something. But he never did, he just stayed in one spot until his demise. When I think about it, I think he knew that if he went out that they would capture him and perform experiments on him while he was still alive.

"So are those two equal or have you come to a decision?" I asked her while keeping my sadness masked.

"Urgh. It's hard to choose. They both were such pains in the asses to kill. And they had to die immediately without capture or else they could get away." She said with anger.

I clenched my fists tighter and ground my teeth together. She thought for a few minutes as we passed over the bridge out of Snowdin Village.

"I think Justice. You couldn't each get close to touching it if it deemed you "Un-Just." Undyne answered.

I nodded as we continued on in silence. We checked through a few areas, seeing nothing in particular. We encountered a few of the dogs and they said they smelled nothing, saying that if the human was around then it would of left a scent. Undyne simply nodded and told them that they were good boys.

"Very interesting." Undyne said roughly.

I looked over to her,

"And why is that?" I asked.

"Nothing of interest. Nothing reported other than my source. No deaths, no scents, no nothing." She said.

"Perhaps your source was wrong?" I asked, very hopeful that I could dissuade her.

"Not possible, we shared memories." Undyne said in finality.

I took a soft intake of breath as I internally panicked. Undyne would go that far to make sure the source was correct?

"That sounds very... awkward." I responded.

"It was, to see another monster's soul when you are not in a certain sort of situation is very awkward." Undyne said with a shiver.

We continued searching throughout Snowdin. By the time we reached the Ruins entrance Undyne was positively pissed.

"Well, we fuckin know that it couldn't of went back into that place." She hissed out as she spat at the door.

"Yeah, that door is impossible to breach." I added with uninterest.

"We are going to have to put the entire Underground in lock-down." She spat out as she began storming off back to Snowdin Village.

I knew it was going to happen if they didn't find her. Routine home breaches every day at random, guards posted in every area 24/7. Each entrance to each area locked off and you have to get checked every time you want to go through. I was intimately familiar with the situation as I lived through it three times. I sighed as I began to start catching up to Undyne.

"Undyne, what do you need me to do?" I asked as soon as I caught up with her.

"You are probably going to get called up by Asgore soon. Since you know more about human's inner-workings, social behaviors, and needs, you are going to be one of the lead people in this again. Don't fret though, you get to work with Alphys." Undyne finished with an unnaturally happy smile on her face.

I groaned internally, and just nodded my head in affirmation.

This was going to suck.

* * *

I was bored. I resorted to just searching around the dump to pass the time. I found nothing of interest after about an hour of searching and just ended up sitting back down on the couch.

At first I was very anxious. Thoughts of Sans somehow getting found out or for some reason Undyne was going to pop out of nowhere filled my thoughts. Now, I just leaned back against the cushions of the couch and every once in a while I would open my eyes and search around.

Eventually I found myself thinking about how much my life has changed in the past few months. I went from threatening people with death to my own life being threatened and me being actually concerned about it. I laughed without humor at the irony. Somehow, my life before the Underground was much simpler. I had a schedule with it. Wake up, sometimes go to school, threaten the few kids that didn't know any better, beat some of them up, go back to the orphanage, sleep, repeat. There I had a reputation. The one kid the rich kids couldn't fuck with.

**Except one....**

I shivered as I thought of _her._ I quickly expelled the thoughts from my head as I thought of Toriel for the first time in weeks.

As soon as the thought came up something within me instantly rejected it.

Instead I thought back to the encounter with "Determination." I hated myself for admitting it but she was right. I was absolutely terrified of Sans.

**"They are so similar. They "care" about you. That means they want something...."**

_"No, Sans was different. He wouldn't be like her."_ I concluded with certainty.

 **"How can you be certain, when they are acting so similar?"** My mind chastised.

I then thought that it could happen. I couldn't let myself be under someones control again. Never be weak. Never again.

I got up from the couch and began to walk around again. Unable to keep still as the time went by so slowly. As I paced around I thought I heard child-like laughter and stopped to check around. I saw nothing out of the ordinary, and the only sound was my own breathing and the occasional patter of water. I chastised myself for hearing things as I continued to pace around.

Another hour goes by and I resort to practicing throwing my knife at a wooden board. About seventy percent of the time I heard a satisfying thunk as the knife hit home. An unnatural feeling of right overcame me each time the knife landed true. I concluded it to me just over reacting the feeling of pride within myself because of my boredom.

"Wow, you certainly are good with that knife."

I whipped around as backpedaled from the voice I just heard. Fortunately I just picked up my knife and held it in a defensive stance as I searched.

Eventually my eyes found the owner of the voice and I was immediately greeted with a familiar yellow flora.

"Flowey." I greeted harshly without letting my eyes leave him.

"Umbra! It's good to see you! I see you haven't killed anyone yet, such a shame." He said with an unnatural amount of glee in his voice.

"Why are you here?" I asked directly.

"Just checking up on my most favorite human in the Underground! You know that Undyne is about to put the entire Underground in lockdown, right?" He asked.

"I figured she would, when she couldn't find me." I responded.

"Man it would be a shame to tell her exactly where you are, wouldn't it?" He said with an evil smile.

I narrowed my eyes at him,

"Yes, it really would be." I responded coolly.

"Don't worry I won't tell.... yet." He promised with a wink.

"Why?" Was all I asked. He laughed as he answered,

"Because I still have hope you will kill some of these worthless souls." He said with an evil, toothy grin.

"You know, I'm getting a lot of people recently telling me to go out and commit genocide like it's just going to work." I whispered sarcastically.

"What?" Flowey spat out.

"Nothing." I said quickly.

"God, you are annoying." He said with a sigh.

"You know I could attack you now." I said with a soft growl.

"If you do I will immediately let the entire Royal Guard know where you are exactly and who is helping you." He replied with a manic smile.

 **"Do it anyways, if he get's away you can just reset...."** My mind coo'd at me.

I expelled those thoughts out as I chastised myself. I am limited by how many times I can reset, and I don't enjoy dying that much.

"Are you done here?" I growled out my question at Flowey.

"Sure am! Have fun in this dump! And remember, I'm counting on you!" He cheerfully said as he disappeared under the earth.

I sighed softly as I stared at the spot for a few more minutes. After staring for five minutes I let myself relax and go back to the couch. I rubbed my temples as I felt a headache come on.

Today fucking sucked.

* * *

Undyne and I walked back to my house in silence. The sky was beginning to darken as the day turned into afternoon. I wished Undyne would leave right now and I could go get Umbra, but she was adamant about seeing Papyrus' cooking.

I thought of how we were going to hide Umbra with the Underground being in lockdown. Papyrus would have to use magic to hide her scent, as he had to constantly do it to expel the burning smell whenever he messed up cooking. However, we did have one of those secret rooms in my closet. I thought about it and figured it could work. It was quite small, but it was large enough to fit a sleeping bag inside. I felt bad that Umbra was going to have to use it, but I felt better knowing that it was well hidden and close to my own room. I felt my cheeks flush slightly when I thought of how close to my room she was going to be. I knew for a fact now that I cared for Umbra a great deal. Probably more than I reasonably should. However, how could I not when her and I had such similarities. She understood what it felt like to be an outcast, she knew what it felt like to lose meaning, and to not care about anything anymore. Ever since she died my feelings towards her have increased tenfold. It was like I was blind and the veil between my eyes was lifted.

I sighed as I reprimanded myself for letting things get out of control, but they seem to always do in my presence.

"What are you sighing about over there?" Undyne's harsh voice interrupted my thoughts.

"Oh, just wanting this to be over before he turns into something big." I said casually while putting my hands in my jacket pockets.

"Damn right. I hope that thing turns up soon so that there won't be any casualties. Then we can finally go to the surface and enact our revenge." Undyne spat out.

My fingers tightened to fists in my pockets as we continued walking. I was beyond pissed at Undyne now, but I could understand where she was coming from. She has seen a lot of Monsters be killed over the years, and she just wants everyone to get out of the Underground. However, her vengeance has just gotten worse and worse over the years and I was afraid for the human's who had no part in this.

Ever since the first human died Asgore had ordered every human that fell to death, even though he knew they were innocent. I oddly thought of Umbra when I thought of innocence. That speech she gave weeks ago, about how the Surface turned the innocent into the corrupted, or they were sentenced to death. Funnily enough, the Underground did the exact same thing to the children that fell. They were forced to defend themselves at some point, and eventually they either died by staying innocent or lived by becoming corrupted. It was honestly one of the saddest thoughts I ever had.

Eventually, we found ourselves walking through Snowdin Village. Soft Christmas lights illuminated the darkening sky, and when we passed by Grillby's, most if not all, of the inhabitants were inside laughing and drinking. I internally cringed, knowing that by tomorrow almost everyone in the Underground would know that a human lay among them.

"Ah, I can smell cooking already!" Undyne said loudly as we reached my home.

We entered my home and I noticed Papyrus hard at work, cooking something other than spaghetti. I noticed that it was some form of lasagna. It looked like a standard lasagna with multiple types of cheese, it was topped with what seemed to be parsley.

"AH, SANS AND UNDYNE. HOW DID YOUR TRIP FAIR?" Papyrus beamed from the kitchen.

"Not as good as we hoped it to be, but I have a feeling it will turn out okay in the end. Especially since I have your cooking to enjoy." Undyne said with a toothy smile.

As soon as Undyne turned away from Papyrus, he gave me a concerned yet hopeful look. I winked at him and nonchalantly walked into the kitchen.

"ANYWAYS, THE COOKING IS READY. I HOPE YOU ENJOY THE FRUITS... WELL NOODLES OF MY LABOR." Papyrus happily said as he got three plates for us to have our food on.

"Wow Papyrus this looks good! But didn't you make a little too much?" Undyne asked while picking up her fork.

Papyrus flinched softly, not enough to alert Undyne, but enough to tell me that he realized he may have fucked up.

"W-WELL, I WANTED TO US HAVE SOME LEFTOVERS FOR TOMORROW'S BREAKFAST." Papyrus explained as he sat down to begin eating.

I calmed myself down as I picked up my own fork and began to eat the cuisine.

It wasn't too bad. The cheese was the best part, soft and gooey, I believe it was a mix of parmesan, mozzarella, and ricotta. The faults were it was a little too salty and he overcooked it slightly, but it was a major improvement.

"Wow, Pap. This is really good!" I praised as I wolfed down the Italian cuisine.

Papyrus beamed as Undyne nodded in affirmation. We sat the rest of the meal in relative silence as we wolfed down the food. The only sound was the clattering of metal utensils against porcelain plates.

"Ah that was wonderful! You have improved a lot since you started, Papyrus. However, you need to make sure you are not overcooking it. Periodically check to make sure. Also I can tell you didn't measure your salt! Measure everything you put into your meals and you will have an outstanding cuisine!" Undyne lectured.

Papyrus was still beaming, even after being told his faults with the meal.

"THANKS UNDYNE! I WILL MAKE SURE TO MEASURE MY SALT AND CHECK MY FOOD MORE AS IT'S COOKING!" Papyrus basically yelled in excitement as he gathered our plates and put them in the dishwasher.

Undyne and I both got up and walked to the door.

"Sans, I need to talk with you before I leave. Mind if we talk outside?" Undyne whispered to me.

I nodded softly as we both exited my home into the cold night.

"Just keep an eye out. I know that you know more about human's than the entire Underground minus Asgore. If you see anything suspicious alert me and we can take care of it together." She said seriously.

I narrowed my eyes and nodded at her. She nodded back and began to walk away. Then she stopped and turned around,

"You look a lot better, Sans. I'm happy for you." She said before turning back around and walking to where the Riverperson would be.

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. I immediately went back inside the house and noticed Papyrus was looking at me with concern.

"She left without suspecting anything, I'm going to go get Umbra and bring her back." I told him.

"W-WAIT! SANS!" Papyrus called out to me before I teleported.

He walked up to me slowly and gazed into my eyes.

"You care for Umbra a lot don't you?" He said softly.

I froze, not knowing what to say so I just stayed silent.

"Ever since she has arrived you have looked a lot better. Better than I have ever seen you before. You laugh genuinely, you smile when you think no one is around to see it. So....." Papyrus paused as he let a few orange tears fall.

"I am happy that you finally found someone that you love." He said with a choked voice.

I flinched as he said love. Love was such a strong word, love was the absolute infatuation with someone. An obsession. A need.

When I thought of those words and compared them to how I felt about Umbra, it was then I knew Papyrus was correct. I loved Umbra.

"Pap. I love you too, you know that." I responded softly.

"I know Sans, but I know the love you have for Umbra is completely different than the love you have for me and the love I have for you." He said.

I went up and hugged my brother tightly.

"Thank you, Pap. Without you I wouldn't have gotten this far and met her." I told him with a choked voice.

Papyrus merely tightened his hold in response. After a few seconds, the embrace ended as Papyrus backed away.

"NOW GO GET HER! SHE NEEDS TO EAT THIS FOOD WHILE ITS STILL HOT!" Papyrus beamed as he wiped away his tears.

I nodded with a genuine smile as I popped out of existence.

* * *

I heard a pop and cursed as Sans appeared right in front of me.

"Sorry..." Sans said sheepishly.

"Your fine, I've been on edge all fuckin day." I responded as I rubbed my temples.

"Why? What happened?" He asked in concern.

I groaned as the headache increased tenfold when I thought of the encounter with Flowey.

"That fuckin sorry excuse for a talking flower showed up and basically threatened me." I said.

Sans' eyes narrowed as he basically growled out,

"What?!"

"Yeah. He said if I didn't start murdering people then he would tell Undyne everything." I said with a sigh.

It was eerily silent as Sans seethed in anger. His left eye started wisping blue, much like how it did during our first trip to the Library.

"I will fucking kill that flower." He said in a quiet anger.

I absolutely loved to see when people that were normally calm and serene turn into a calamity. It was beautiful to watch their usual placid figure turn and twist into one of pandemonium and anarchy.

"Trust me. I wanted to as well, but I couldn't risk him getting away and telling Undyne sooner." I said with a growl.

Sans was brought out of his turmoil at the mention of Undyne and immediately held out his arm to me.

"She is going to be coming through Waterfall soon. We need to get back home, I need to tell you a lot of shit." He said in earnest.

I nodded as I put my backpack on and grabbed onto his arm. He once again turned it into an embrace as I felt that terrible feeling overcome me.

We seperated as soon as we landed. I felt extremely dizzy and grabbed onto the couch as I groaned.

I froze as I smelled something so familiar, yet so far away. It was a food, I knew that. I began walking towards the kitchen absentmindedly. I could hear voices in the back of my mind, sounding somewhat concerned as I looked into the pan.

_"Come on Umbra, eat up so you can be big and strong!" A woman's voice pierced my ears._

I grabbed the closest fork as I picked up a piece of the lasagna. As soon as my mouth closed around the gathering of noodles and cheese I felt an extreme sadness permeate through me.

_The pages of a book being turned as it was read to me. A soft woman's voice saying things as my imagination ran wild with the words being spoken. Her cooking and the smell making me excited, the taste of delicious cheese and noodles._

"Mom...." I whispered to myself, as if testing to see if the words were true.

I took another bite as emotions coursed through me. Ones that I have not felt since I was still innocent to the world. The want to be held my your mother, to be told it was going to be okay as you scrapped your knees. Her kisses and comfort.

There was a time when I felt just like this. Wanting my mom back, hating being in the orphanage. The "mother" of the orphanage was an old, terrible lady who only provided the bare minimum for the children. Every day for about a year after being placed there I wanting my mom back. Eventually, the desire for mother left as I started to fend for myself. After some time, the memory of mom was forsaken and I was only left with a couple of memories.

_"I don't even remember her face..." I thought to myself_

"Umbra!" A loud voice pierced my thoughts.

I looked over to see Sans' face contorted into one of concern and mild fear. Papyrus was no different as he stared at me unease.

"Sorry... I have not tasted or smelt this specific thing in some time." I quietly explained as I set the fork back down and backed away from the food.

_"You have to let go." I thought._

"Are you okay?" Sans asked gently.

I looked up at him and gave a reassuring smile,

"Yeah, just give me a minute. I just need to think." I said.

Sans nodded in understanding before he spoke again,

"We need to talk about what Undyne plans to do. Will that be okay?" He asked as he gestured to the couch.

I nodded as Sans and I began walking over. Papyrus nodded at both of us before going up to his room. We both sat down and Sans began talking about what happened.

"Alright, so of course they didn't find you. So she is going to tell Asgore to put the entire Underground in lockdown. Basically what that means is randomized house invasions, each area has checkpoints that you must go through to gain entry, and there will be 24/7 guard patrols in each area." He explained. I nodded in affirmation as he continued,

"So we are going to have to move you to a more secure location in the house just in case we get invaded. I have one of those small rooms in the back of my closet you can use to sleep in. It's kind of small but its better than sitting in the living room and having the door bust down and they find you just sitting there. Papyrus is also going to be using magic to wash your scent from the house every day, it's fortunate he knows this magic as he used to make the house smell like burned noodles every time he cooked when he first started" He said.

"Okay that seems like a good idea." I replied simply. Seeing no other option than this.

Sans sighed as he leaned back against the couch. His face contorted into one of sadness mixed with fear.

"I'm sure you would like to go back to the Surface now, wouldn't you?" He questioned quietly without looking at me.

I scoffed as I heard his question. He immediately looked over to me in surprise.

"Believe it or not Sans, I still find it better down here than up there." I replied.

"How? You are being hunted and you will die if you stay down here. Hell you already have!" He said in anguish.

"Because Sans. Up there I had no purpose. I was just waiting for the day I finally got stabbed to death or shot. Or the day I finally gave up, which is what happened!" I said in anger.

I immediately felt bad for getting angry, as Sans face flinched, not expecting me to get angry. He likely never heard me raise my voice like this before.

"I walked up the mountain because I was going to get kicked out of the orphanage the next day. I climbed up expected to die within a month, yet I fell down here and ever since I have felt better than I ever had up there." I explained in a calmer voice.

"You're an orphan?" He asked in a whisper.

"My mother and father died when I turned three. I barely have any memories of my mother, and none so far of my father." I replied.

He was silent for a few moments, he looked as if he was in shock.

"Pap and I... we are orphans as well." He said gently.

I felt my eyes widen in surprise. However, when I thought about it, it made sense. I never heard them talk about their parents before, nor have I ever seen their parents.

"Our father died during an experiment with one of the first human souls we got. Skeleton babies grow at a very slow rate, so by the time we could start walking around and thinking for ourselves it was years after." He added quietly.

"My mother and father died during a break-in. I was at a daycare during the incident. They were both shot to death." I explained to him.

His eyes softened with melancholy,

"I'm sorry." He said.

"It's fine. I keep telling myself I need to move on, that they won't come back and that I need to depend on myself and not on ghosts." I said.

"Sans... ever since I fell down I have finally understood what it means to be alive. On the surface I was just living, I was just breathing. I was continuing without a purpose, other than the innate desire to live. Ever since I opened that door and set foot onto the snow, that simple primal desire to live turned into a conscious effort to be alive. Ever since you made me a part of that horrible joke with your woopie cushion I could finally feel the blood in my veins. I could finally hear my heart beat. I could finally feel the air in my lungs." I continued.

Sans stared at me, and I finally returned his gaze, staring him in the eyes,

"Sans as long as your around, I feel alive."

We simply stared at each other. Opposite ends of the couch, opposite ends of the same coin. A comedian that can finally tell true jokes and a shadow that finally knew light. The apprehension was thick in the air, so thick I felt like I was choking. My vision clouded over as I felt immense deja-vu.

_"My little shadow you stare at me so wantingly, how can I deny you?" A seductive female voice said._

_"L-Lena... I'm not so sure I-" I tried to explain._

_"Shhh my little shadow, I know you want this...." She comforted with her viper voice as she closed the distance between us. I was scared, I was beyond terrified and I wanted out. But I believed her. I believed that she knew that I wanted this so I didn't run. She cared about me, right? So she knew best._

I immediately got off of the couch and looked away from Sans.

"I-I'm kind of tired, can you show me to that room?" I asked with a waver in my voice.

I cursed myself for allowing that waver through. Be strong. Never be weak. Be a wall where the glass wants to come through.

"Umbra are you-" He tried to say.

"Just let me sleep." I pleaded, still not looking directly at him.

He was silent as he got up from the couch and began to walk up the stairs. I followed him, keeping a comfortable distance between us as he lead me to his room. I started panicking, realizing that I would be so close to where he slept.

_"Sweet thing, come to my room and be more comfortable. You are just nervous, I know it's your first time so it's to be expected." Her venom entranced me so. I followed her as I felt a mounting dread fall over me. I felt like I shouldn't be doing this, that I didn't want to. But she cared about me, she listened to me, she loved me, didn't she?_

Please. Please just don't be like her Sans. Please don't.

I followed him into his room. It was messy, beyond so. Clothes lay scattered on the floor and books lay strewn about. It was an immediate contrast to _Her_ room. My anxiety only released a little as I followed him to his closet.

"It's a little small. I already got Papyrus to put some blankets inside and a pillow." Sans said gently.

I flinched when I heard his voice, but I managed to nod sharply as I opened the door and got inside.

"Goodnight Umbra." Sans said gently.

I was silent for a moment, debating whether or not I should respond. I made a decision after about five seconds,

"Goodnight Sans." I said in as strong a voice I could manage before closing the tiny door and engulfing myself in darkness.

* * *

I stared at the door she closed a little too hard. She was acting so strangely. Her usual strong outer appearance wavered significantly since that moment she told me I made her feel alive. Those few moments we simply stared at each other, I expected to end in something. It was like the few moments before someone leaned forward and initiated a kiss. Yet, that didn't happen. She got up from the couch and didn't dare look me in the eyes. Her fingers twitched and she was breathing faster. She was afraid.

_"Did I do something wrong?" I asked myself in my thoughts._

I sighed softly as I moved quietly from the closet to my own bed. What was she afraid of? Was she afraid of not being alone anymore? She struck me as a person that was afraid of not knowing what was going to happen. She liked to be in control and this situation seemed like one she wasn't in control of. I decided that must be it as I looked at the ceiling of my room. My cheeks flushed as I thought back to that moment on the couch. I wanted to lean forward and kiss her. I wanted to kiss her until the Earth crumbled into oblivion and forget about the terrible situation we were in. I wanted my love for her to turn from a friendship to a devotion.

I reprimanded myself for thinking such thoughts. She obliviously didn't want to, so I decided to lock my emotions behind the tightest cage I could muster. It was obvious that she loved me, but not in the way that I loved her. I clenched my fists together as I looked over to the closet. I was so concerned for her. The way her eyes turned to pure, unadulterated fear. Even greater than the fear her eyes held when I saw her dying. I hoped that she was alright as I brought the blankets over my body.

I lay staring at the closet for a while. Simply unable to go to sleep as I felt all of my emotions for Umbra try to break free. The love I wanted to show her, the desire I wanted to feel. I let out a soft groan as I tossed and turned, trying to expel the thoughts from my mind.

It was then I started softly crying. The emotions I felt too much for me to simply lock away. I looked up to Umbra in that aspect. The way she could just lock her emotions behind a steel wall and look fine on the outside. I fully expected her to cry when she was reminded of her mother, but all she had was a soft look of sadness. No tears, no lamentation. Yet, here I lay. Crying because the woman I loved didn't feel the same love I felt.

_It took a long time for the wanton embrace of sleep decided to bless me with it's small mercy. I dreamt of her lips on mine, my phalanges grabbing onto her hair as we kissed beneath the night sky. Nebulae provided the most beautiful colors as the great expanse of stars twinkled their appreciation for our love. The smallest part of me that was still conscious thanked my mindscape for providing me this small victory._

_If our love could not be real in consciousness then it could be real in the fantasy of dreams._


	15. Damnum Imperium

Three days passed with nothing too exciting happening. Umbra was was slightly awkward at first, but she apologized for how the acted that night. I didn't go further into it seeing that she clearly didn't want to explain further. The entire Underground went into pandemonium as soon as the call was made that a human was lurking in the shadows. Undyne told everyone to stay in their homes unless absolutely necessary. If there was anything suspicious you reported it to the nearest guard immediately and get away as fast as possible. She also explained that there would be periodic checkpoints in-between the areas of the Underground, making sure that the human could not come through.

I sighed as I looked over to Umbra. She was sitting in the closet, reading the book about magic she borrowed from the Library last week. Her face was tight with concentration, and I found myself having to call her name multiple times to get her attention whenever she decided to read. It was as if she was in her own world, entirely consisting of whatever words decided to grace the page.

My feelings for her have not changed. Every time I looked at her my soul twinged in slight pain. She had been behaving slightly different ever since that night. Her usual strong demeanor had wavered slightly whenever she believed no one was looking. Her eyes held an unnatural amount of fear within them. Like she was afraid something would come out of the shadows and attack her. At first, I believed it was fear for the house raids, but whenever I would mention them she acted like it wasn't a big deal. It was something I didn't know about and it was entirely infuriating. Was it me? Was it something else? All I wanted to do was help her through whatever it was, but I was afraid to ask about it.

"Sans." Her voice interrupted my thoughts.

"What's up?" I responded, acting like I wasn't already looking at her.

"In this book it mentions the dilemma of calling the fallen human's "powers" magic. Can you elaborate further?" She asked me, the thought of learning something new gleaming in her eyes.

"It's kind of a long explanation. Do you want the shortened version or the long version?" I asked, already knowing the answer. She scoffed as if I insulted her, but her lips turns into a half smile,

"Long version, what do you take me for, Sans?" She responded. I chuckled as I cleared my throat,

"Do you remember how I said Integrity had the power of making whoever she was talking to believe her as long as she told the truth?" I asked her. She nodded sharply, as she closed the book she held and turned her body to face mine.

"Well, each human that has fallen has had some form of power associated with their main soul trait. Determination can return to save points after they have died, although I believe the power to be limited it some way, so you can't come back forever, like I said before." I said.

"What were the other kids power's?" She asked as her head cocked in that bird-like fashion.

"It will be easier to go in order, I think." I said. "Patience had the power to calm people enough to the point of making them pass out as long as he was serene. Integrity had the power to make anyone believe her as long as she was telling the truth. Kindness could heal any wound, either on him or monster immediately, even if it was fatal. Perseverance could see the future and he took the longest to kill because of it. Bravery could make anyone cower in fear before him. Justice could deem anyone "Un-Just" and they wouldn't be able to raise a weapon against her. Lastly, of course, Determination. Who's power is to be a complete and utter ass to certain skeleton friends of hers." I finished with a cheeky smile on my face.

She scoffed as she through some clothes at me. I scrambled as I tried to dodge the mixture of socks and shorts but she through one too quick and it struck me on the chest.

I fell back in faux agony, reaching toward the ceiling.

"Ah you have fatally wounded me cruel woman!" I said in a dramatic fashion as I let myself go limp on the bed in a fake death.

I heard shuffling and soft walking against carpet grow closer to me. I stayed still, wondering what she planned to do. It was then I felt weight on top of me and fabric go over my face. I opened my eyes to see her on top of me and shoving a mound of random clothes over my face.

"You must always make sure your kills go through!" She said in a faux vicious voice, holding back laughter as I began to try and get her off of me to enact my revenge. However, she had me in a good hold. Her weight was entirely on my pelvis so I couldn't lift up. I grabbed her arms and began trying to through her balance off, but man she was extremely good at making sure she was on good. We were giggling and laughing as I fought to gain control, eventually I decided to cheat and throw her mass off a little by using my power.

It was enough that I could flip her over and shove the clothes she tried to "suffocate" me with into her own face, albeit not enough to actually suffocate her.

Eventually she managed to throw the clothes off her face,

"Using gravity powers are unfair!" She whined uncharacteristically. I chuckled as I looked at her face. Her cheeks were tinged with red from exertion, her breaths were slightly ragged as well. The realization that we were so close to one another, that I lay on top of her, that it would be so easy to just lean forward and envelope her in a kiss. It was then her eyes lit up with a soft fear.

"Um, Sans you are kind of squishing me." She said.

I reprimanded myself internally, but decided to play along with it.

"Oh right sorry. But I am 100% counting this as a win for Sans." I said with a cheeky smile as I got up from on top of her and moved away a fair bit of distance on the bed.

"No, you cheated. If I can't use magic then you can't use magic." She said with a soft growl.

"In real life you wouldn't have a choice." I said, my smile growing wider.

"Well Sans if you want it to be "real life" then I can break your arms." She said with a raised eyebrow.

I held my hands up in defeat, "Alright no magic."

"So you lose by default and the win goes to me." She said, returning my cheeky smile from earlier.

"Such a bitch..." I whispered loud enough for her to hear.

She began to once again pelt me with clothing and I started laughing.

"Alright! Alright! I yield!" I said loudly as I wondered how she was able to make clothes feel like rocks.

She laughed loudly as the rain of clothing stopped. Her bell-like laughter pierced my ears one again. My soul twinged softly as I heard it, wishing it would never stop.

It stopped as we heard a knock on the door.

"SANS I NEED TO SPEAK WITH YOU A MINUTE!" Papyrus' voice said loudly through the door.

I narrowed my eyes in concern. I looked at Umbra and she just nodded softly and returned to her spot in the closet. I sighed as I got up and opened the door. Papyrus was standing right outside of the door and looked extremely concerned.

"SANS...." Papyrus started before looking down to the ground. "Undyne came to me before I got home. She said Asgore wants to see you by four." I felt my body freeze over but quickly shook it off as I knew that this would happen eventually. It was three right now so I had an hour to explain to Umbra what this could entail and teleport to Asgore's castle.

"Alright. Thanks Pap, I need to tell Umbra about it just in case I have to do something and can't come home immediately after." I explained.

Papyrus nodded sharply before turning around to go downstairs. I sighed loudly as my mind raced with how everything could go wrong. I opened the door and silently motioned for Umbra to sit next to me on the bed. She slowly got up from her spot in the closet and moved to sit next to me.

"I heard you guys. Why does Asgore want to see you?" She asked me with an emotionless expression. I sighed as I rubbed my temples and looked to the ground.

"Basically, I am the most informed on humans in the underground scientifically. I used to research humans extensively, and I am one of the only Monsters that fought with the previous humans on a regular basis." I explained. After a few moments of silence I looked up at her. She really didn't have a readable expression.

"As you know I used to be a Royal Scientist. It was a brief affair since I refused to be a part of the team that researched the two Human's that died in my lifetime. I mainly worked in the division that took trashed Human electronics and transformed it into something we could use. However, as a past-time I would take books on anatomy and psychology that fell down here and research all I could. It's one of the main reasons I got so good at lying as Human psychology isn't so different from Monster psychology. However, Asgore caught wind about it and I was responsible for teaching Elite Guardsmen about the Human nature. What Human's needed to survive, what they could survive and what they couldn't. Where to strike to deliver fatal wounds, where to strike to incapacitate. I believe Asgore is calling me so he can use me to try and find you." I finished.

Umbra looked me in the eyes. Her gaze freezing me as I studied the intricacies of her stunning eyes.

"Will you be okay?" She asked.

"I believe so, however, he might want me to do some things so I might not be back for a while if we are unlucky." I answered.

She made an irritated noise similar to a soft growl, "I really don't like you doing this alone."

My soul lurched at the concern she had for me but I quickly forced the feeling away, "I know, if the situation was reversed I would hate to see you go so deep into enemy territory, but I have to." I said gently. I hated that I had to leave her like this, especially since the Royal Guard are doing house checks. It took everything I had to swallow my insecurities and push forward. I just kept telling myself this will help in the end and improve our chances.

Her hand touched my shoulder, without my jacket I could feel how cold her hand was against my clavicle and scapula. You would expect her to be warm, since she was an organic being with blood and an internal heat regulating system. Yet, whenever she touched me it was like ice. "You promise to teleport right back here if your life is threatened?" She asked me seriously. I scoffed as I looked away from her face,

"And do what? Run forever in this limited space? Being hunted until we are both captured or killed?" I said as I held my head in my hands.

It was then I felt her fingers on my jaw, I turned back to her face and saw the sincerity in her eyes.

"Better than to die separated, right?" She said gently.

I froze as I took in her words. I wanted to call out on the insanity, but I knew for a fact I felt the same way. Her eyes took in an evil glint, and I saw a small part of her that I never saw before.

"And we can kill every single one that comes to kill us." She said softly, like a mother cooing reassurances to me.

This was the part of Umbra that lived on the Surface. Cold, calculating, slightly evil. Willing to hurt others to make sure she wasn't harmed herself. It was then her voice broke me out of my thoughts, "Sans, remember. You are always in control, never let it go. Never let someone take it, never let someone make you weak. To stay in control is to hurt the ones that want to take it from you, to stay in control is to make yourself feared, to stay in control is to be alone. But we are the same Sans. We don't have to be alone."

Control. The one thing I have always wanted, but never had. I was not in control when my father died. I was not in control when Bravery was possessed and killed the entire Underground multiple times over. When Undyne and I trapped him in an endless cycle, and he eventually ended it for us. I was not in control when Justice, the tiny girl with platinum blonde hair, was impaled and died with a smile on her face. I was not in control when I held Umbra in my arms, her blood and gore coating me as she whispered my name into the void. I am not in control when I look upon her face and feel an unnatural amount of love for her. I hated myself for it, the way I could never gain control over my life. I hated how weak I am, how even with the power I possess I cannot use it for my own good.

Now here was Umbra, saying that I am in control. Saying to never be weak and to never let it go. Her eyes were gleaming with a sort of madness that comes with what she had to deal with. I felt a pandemonium of emotions. An endless spiral of fear, anxiety, hatred, anger, and most importantly: Desire. The desire to finally be in control. To make the ones that used to loom over me fear me and to no longer fear for my own life. It was overwhelming and I felt my smile widen like a Cheshire cat. Umbra's own lips mimicked mine as I saw her eyes glow with an emotion I never seen directed at me. Pride.

She was... proud of me.

So I took what she said to heart and gained control. My weaker self would of saw the closeness we shared together, how easy it would be to lean forward and take her lips into mine. I'm sure I would of lost control if she did not say those exact words to me and mumbled some simple reassurances that any normal person would. Again, she was not normal. And neither was I.

So I controlled myself, and simply leaned forward and hugged her. The light rain turned into a heavy downpour as I engulfed the calamity she exuded. Controlled chaos. That is what the essence of control was. To control the chaos of your surroundings and shape it into what you wish it to be. My thoughts turned into if I could control Umbra, the last thing in my life that I had no control over. I immediately recoiled as I expelled those thoughts. No. This was the one thing I would let run rampant in my life now. The one singular thing that could control me, and not the other way around.

I smiled into her shoulder, happy that she could control me into a better person. At least, a better person for myself.

* * *

I wanted to run and scream. I wanted to take my **knife** and gain that control. To make the ones that wished to hurt me **fear me.** I wanted Sans and I to be safe and live our lives in peace. I could feel someone tugging at me, to go out and **kill.**

Sans' lips turned into an evil smile, one that certainly matched my own. He accepted to take **control.** Oh Sans... let's go out and commit a **genocide** against these **worthless** Monsters that just want to hurt us. I was so proud of him, so proud that he accepted it.

My subconsciousness heard the child-like giggles turn into full on madness riddled screeches of laughter. I never have to be alone on my high mountain again. I never had to see the mix of fear and resentment as I passed by the others. Whenever they decided to try and kill me I could have him at my side while we **massacred** them.

My heart was beating, pumping hot blood through my veins. I could feel the adrenaline coursing, the absolutely _wonderful_ insanity of it made me just want to laugh.

Then.... it stopped. It was like time froze over and left me to ponder in its wake. I found myself in an evergreen forest, a light rain making the greens and browns much darker than usual. I stood in that lush forest for what seemed like an eternity, basking in its serenity. A soft wind pulled at my hair and tugged at my soul. It was then I noticed the child-like manic screams of laughter left my head and I was finally there alone.

I finally opened my eyes to see I sat in the same room as before. Sans tightly embracing me, his face in my shoulder. I looked up at the ceiling, confused and relieved. I lifted my arms shakily as I hugged Sans back, like the limbs didn't trust what my mind ordered them to do. I swallowed as I whetted my throat, finding it impossibly dry. It was like I finally woke up after a long nap, the drowsiness and lethargy of staying still, stuck in your dreams. The introduction of reality shocked me and there was a part of me that **hated** being woken up.

Sans exited from the embrace and looked at me like I was the Moon and he was the tides. He looked slightly perturbed as he studied my face, and I imagined that I must look as blank as I feel. I felt like... nothing. The only emotion I felt was a slight confusion. Like I was dealt a major blow to the skull and I woke up hours later not having any memory.

I simply gazed upon Sans' face, and I found a change. It was simple, almost un-noteworthy, but to me any change within Sans was like seeing a building where rolling hills used to be. He looked... in control. The chaos he never reigned in around him, especially of late, was finally under his control. It was then I corrected myself, he was the Moon that controlled the tides of calamity, and he looked at me like I was the Earth. Without the Earth, the Moon would simply float away, having nothing to cling to, and without the Earth he couldn't control her tides.

I smiled softly, expressing the first real emotion since my coming to. I felt happy for him.

"I should get going soon." He said in his new voice. One of control, one of confidence.

His voice danced in the betwixt of my consciousness and unconsciousness. I heard him but to acknowledge such a thing was like trying to catch the air. I said something, not exactly knowing what but he smiled at me with a mixture of sadness and happiness. He got up from the bed and I followed him with a lazy gaze, my movements sluggish as my body followed his movements.

"Tell Papyrus that I left and that I will be back as soon as I can, alright?" He asked me. I think I nodded because he seemed to accept whatever my body did. He smiled once again and leaned down to give me a quick hug, "Stay safe." He said as he popped out of existence.

I stared at the spot where he once stood, confounded and confused. I do not know how much time passed but I found myself moving and exiting the room.

"AH UMBRA! HAS SANS LEFT TO GO SEE THE KING?" I heard Papyrus ask from somewhere in the house. I do not know how I answered but he said nothing more as I found myself in the bathroom.

I shed my clothing, and relished the cold air on my bare skin. Little pinpricks of cool air, sharp teeth and claws digging into my pores. My sluggish movements moved me in front of the mirror. The woman looked normal but had this.... off feeling. The way her face was completely devoid of all emotion. The way her stare was a little too intense, too searching. Sometimes I found the blue in her eyes shift to a brighter, more red color, but it was fleeting. She looked away as I went to the shower and turned on the water. I stepped inside and sat on the floor, hugging my knees to my chest. The water stinged so beautifully against my skin, making the normal pale color turn to an irritated red as I sat with only the sound of running water comforting me.

The madness of the past haunted me as I slowly regained my senses. The desire to hurt, to kill, to tear, to rip, to destroy. It gnawed at me and growled in displeasure when I did not heed its call. It was then I understood the irony of the situation. I called for Sans to take control, to control the world with me. At the same time, I completely lost that control.

I felt a cold liquid, much colder than the one that surrounded me, fall against my cheeks. I screamed internally, knowing that I could not do it externally. I dry heaved and made tumultuous sounds as I lamented. Quiet enough to hide, to stay hidden, but loud enough to allow me to hear my displeasure. I pulled at my hair and beat the sides of my head with my fists. I rolled around on the ground as the liquid of the shower mixed with snot, tears, and blood.

Worthless! Worthless! Worthless!

Weak! Weak! Weak!

You stupid fucking whore! You stupid fucking bitch!

Stop losing control you absolutely disgusting piece of a human!

How dare you! How fucking dare you!

I cried until my voice gave out and turned into a rasping mess. I coughed up blood and watched in satisfaction as the water that went down the drain was stained red. I got up slowly as I turned the water off and stepped out of the shower. My ragged breaths now the only sound to comfort me as I went up to the mirror.

Her face was a beautiful display of calamity. Her eyes were bloodshot and tears constantly tracked down her cheeks. Blood dribbled out of her lips and mixed with snot down her chin into a disgusting goo. The sides of her head dripped with blood and stained her neck and shoulders red. I found myself growing weak as I slid down the wall and stared at nothing.

"Never be weak. Always be strong. Never lose control." I said quietly. My voice broken and tearing with each syllable I pronounced. I tasted blood on my tongue after I spoke, the taste comforting my perverse sense of mind.

My consciousness decided to give me at least some small form of mercy, as my world was engulfed by a soothing atramentous.

* * *

I popped into existence at the beautiful, golden, light-filled hall. I still found myself sometimes at awe of magic. Even though I lived with it, even though it was an intrinsic part of my very being, this one room in the Underground always took my metaphorical breath away.

I walked through the hall, the sound of my footsteps echoing being the only sound. In a way it was eerie. Like the hall was testing my very worth, as if tasting my decisions and judging them accordingly. I could not tell if it was pleased or not by the simple silence that permeated through the beautiful building. Eventually I got to the exit, finding myself letting out a breath as I entered the corridor in-between the throne room and the Judgement Hall. It was short-lived as I remembered what the room at the far end of the corridor housed. Little, tiny coffins that were filled with the bones of children. The sadness of it filled me but I quickly swallowed it down. Be in control Sans, remember what you have to do.

I walked confidently to the Throne Room, filled with a sense of pride in myself.

I stared at the 9 foot tall goat Monster. He was bent over, watering golden flowers, humming a melody I had no knowledge of. "Oh." He said sharply as he noticed my presence. "Sans, I'm glad you are here. I believe you are exactly on time." He said jovially as he placed the watering can down on the ground. I would normally feel rage, sadness, or fear, yet I felt nothing except a controlled feeling I had never felt before.

"You summoned me?" I asked, surprised that my voice held such an icy power now. Even Asgore seemed slightly taken aback, expecting to hear the usual lazy voice he normally associated with me.

"O-Oh well. As you know, we have the final human in our midst. I need your ability to teach the Royal Guardsmen Elite how human's interact with the world and how we can drive one out of hiding." Asgore explained himself as he clasped his hands in front of his body. I rolled my eyes over his form. While he was tall, significantly so, I noticed how rigid his shoulders were, how is body seemed to edge away from my own even if it was almost microscopic. He was definitely unsure of me, and he was trying to hide it behind his usual jovial self. I have to reassure him that I am to be trusted.

"How soon can I start? I want us to get to the surface as fast as possible and don't want to keep any of us waiting." I asked.

_"Make him think you are just determined to see this through. That you want to get this done and you are excited to," I told myself._

"Oh. Well you can definitely start today. Firstly I want you to meet Alphys. She has recently become the Head Scientist and I would like you to teach her of Human behavior." He told me with a satisfied smile painted on his face.

I internally patted myself on the back. Proud that I took control of the situation.

"Thank you, I will leave now if there is nothing else you need of me?" I questioned, letting my body show subservient signs, such as angling my body more towards his, not letting my eyes completely reach his, and exposing my stomach to him with nothing obscuring it.

"No that will be all. I expect you to show up to Royal Guardsmen meetings from now on." He finished. He then leaned down and picked up the watering can and began to water the flowers.

I nodded and allowed myself to fade out of existence and reappear at the Royal Scientist Facility.

I felt a small tug at my movements, feeling a small weight to my movements as I teleported large distances. I looked around the slightly cluttered environment, looking for a Monster.

"O-Oh. H-H-Hold on I'll b-be there in a second." A nasally voice said over an intercom. I waited for a few minutes, simply taking in the surroundings. Posters of anime characters littered the wall, and empty ramen cups littered the multiple desks. It was then I heard claw like tapping coming closer as a short, hunched figure walked up to me. She pushed up her round glasses and looked up at me, "H-Hello, I'm A-A-Alphys. But you p-probably already knew t-t-that." She stuttered out. I narrowed my eyes as I studied her form. She kept grasping at her palms and forearms. She never met my own eyes and was trying her best not to look like she was shaking.

"Sans." I replied simply as I held out my hand to her own. She shakily grasped my hand, her scales rubbing against my smooth bones in a weird way. It was then she was silent, not saying anything. I decided to go ahead and continue for her, "Asgore sent me. I was a previous Royal Scientist." I said.

"O-Oh. Yes, I k-k-know all that. U-Um, do you w-w-want to sit d-down or something?" She said anxiously as she gestured to a two-seater in the corner. I nodded as I made my way over to the couch and patiently waited for her to also sit down. Her body was almost completely facing away from mine. She was obviously very uncomfortable and had some form of social anxiety. I internally sighed, this was going to be challenging.

"Asgore ordered me to teach you Human behavior, do you have any prior knowledge to the subject of Humans?" I asked.

"O-Oh I watch their anime a lot. S-S-So if it is a-anything like their normal lives then I know a great d-deal!" She responded. I sighed softly and found myself holding back from rubbing my temples,

"Okay, so anime has absolutely no correlation to actual Human behavior, so we will start from scratch." I said. She simply blushed and stammered before nodding. "Humans are very much like Monsters in the fact they have basic needs that need to be fulfilled almost every waking moment. They actually have more needs because of their organic properties. For example, Humans must relieve themselves of bodily fluids and solids in the form of waste, they also eat more than we do with most Humans needing three sustainable meals a day to stay healthy." I explained. She simply nodded in excitement, seemingly loving learning about the subject. "As you probably know, Humans have basically lost the ability to use magic. However, they are not to be underestimated. Their lack of need for magic means they can use other means to defend themselves. Some are trained in weapons while others can fight with their hands. They are also more durable than Monsters. What would normally dust us would be a sustainable, but treatable wound to a Human." I paused to let the information sink in and to let her ask questions.

"I-I have heard that they are unable to show e-e-empathy." She said. I slowly shook my head.

"Humans are entirely capable of showing all range of emotions that Monsters are able. They are actually able to feel strong Determination where Monsters cannot. Humans actually require explicit emotional and social interactions on a daily basis to keep their mental state healthy. Be that as it may, some Humans have mental deformities and illnesses that can limit their ability to feel some emotions or heighten their ability to feel certain emotions. For example, Borderline Personality Disorder is an illness that affects how Humans interact with each other. Humans afflicted with it tend to compulsively lie, have irrational bouts of anger, engage in highly risky behaviors that could result in their death, and sometimes will always feel this empty feeling, like nothing can satiate it." I explained.

Alphys nodded in rapt attention as I continued to explain the intricacies of the Human mind. Their basic needs, what it takes to satiate their emotional well-being, how they act on a primal level. The anxiety and stuttering she had was sort of annoying but I enjoyed how much she enjoyed the act of learning. She seemed to relax more and more as time went by and eventually she noticed the time and decided to bid me farewell.

"T-Thank you for teaching me so much. I-I-I will tell Asgore how great of a job you did!" She exclaimed as I bid her farewell and popped back to my own house.

"AH BROTHER! DID YOUR MEETING WITH THE KING FARE WELL?" Papyrus exclaimed from the kitchen.

"It went well, Pap. Is Umbra alright?" I asked.

"OH! SHE WENT BACK TO YOUR ROOM AFTER SHOWERING AND HASN'T COME BACK OUT! I WAS ACTUALLY ABOUT TO GO UP THERE AND TELL HER DINNER WAS ALMOST READY!" Papyrus told me as he labored over the food he was making.

"Alright bro, we will be down in a minute." I told him as I ascended the stairs and went to my room. I looked around and noticed Umbra was laying down on my bed, reading the magic book in rapt attention. I smiled softly at the sight before noticing her head had white gauze around it.

"Umbra are you alright?" I asked as I went up close to investigate.

"Oh hey. Yeah I'm alright, just slipped and fell in the shower." She said in a terribly raspy voice as she sat the book down. It was then I noticed how... empty her eyes were. Similar to how I left her, but increased tenfold.

"Do you mind if I heal it then?" I asked.

"Oh uh, yeah sure." She said scratchily. I narrowed my eyes as I sat down next to her and began to remove the bandages. Immediately after the bandages came off trickles of blood slowly fell down the sides of her head. Those marks were not the ones of someone falling and hitting their head, they were scratch marks. I looked up at her eyes with horror as I realized she did this to herself. Yet, instead of being met with shame or a similar sense of horror, her eyes remained blank.

"Umbra, did you do this to yourself?" I asked in a small voice, already knowing the answer.

"Yes." She answered simply. I simply stared at the small rivers of blood flow down her neck and stain her light blue shirt a dark color. It was then I shook my head and snapped out of my horrified fascination and began healing her head. Soft green magic filled the dimly lit room as I worked on closing the wounds. It was simple enough as the wounds were not deep enough to cause terrible damage but it would of taken days for them to scab over.

After I was done I let my arms fall limply to my sides. "Why?" I asked her softly. She shrugged her shoulders and gave me no verbal answers. "Umbra please. Tell me so I can help you." I pleaded with her. It was then I finally found an emotion in her eyes, apprehension.

"I-I am not comfortable talking about it." She answered. "Just know that I am fine now and I will do everything in my power to make sure it doesn't happen again." She finished with a strong voice. I almost sighed in relief that at least she was somewhat normal again, but I did not try to elaborate further on the subject. I knew that it would only do more harm than good to push.

"Well, Asgore has ordered me to start teaching the new Head Royal Scientist about Human behavior and I must be apart of Royal Guard meetings." I explained to Umbra. She nodded as she listened to me continue about what happened during my escapade to New Home and meeting Alphys. She never wavered in her focus, never showing anything other than attention as I retold my story. After I finished we sat quietly for a minute as she took everything in.

"I'm proud of you Sans." She finally said with a happy smile on her face. My soul lurched and spun in pleasure but I quickly forced down those feelings. Controlling them as much as I could.

"Thank you." I replied as simply as I could. She leaned forward and enveloped me in an embrace. It wasn't tight or all encompassing, but was soft and reassuring. It ended quickly as it began and she continued smiling at me. "Oh. Papyrus said dinner was almost ready. You want to go down?" I asked her.

"Oh definitely, I'm starving." She answered as we both got up from the bed.

We both descended down the stairs and ate dinner with Papyrus. I was laughing and making puns, annoying both her and my brother. Papyrus being vocal about it while Umbra just rolled her eyes in silence.

Overall, I found today to be one of the better ones.


	16. Awkward Situations

_Once again I found myself in that space of inky black. My consciousness was alive and rearing, yet reality evaded me. The soft giggling of a child and the pattering of footsteps surrounded me, but I payed no head to them as I stared off in boredom._

_"So in control today, I was worried you would go insane yesterday..." Determination's eerie voice loomed and echoed around me. I frowned at the mention of my outburst, it was unlike anything I ever experienced. At the moment it was exhilarating, it felt right, it felt good._

_"Yes... Just a little insanity can do wonders." She said in a small laugh._

_"You knowing exactly what I'm thinking is slightly unnerving." I commented with a bored tone._

_"Good. That is what it is meant to do. To give me answers and to keep you guessing." She replied as she appeared beside me. "The similarities between us is staggering, why, I find myself thinking we have more in common than you and Sans." She said quietly, staring off into the unknown much like I was._

_"And why is that?" I asked, never moving my gaze from the vast nothing I stared at._

_"Trust me. We are very similar." I could practically hear the evil grin she most definitely wore on her lips._

_"Unfortunately, I don't trust you." I said with finality. She shifted her body to face my own and I forced myself to keep looking at the void._

_"Trust is not needed in this relationship we share, Umbra. It is not necessary." She said softly._

_"And why is that?" I asked in my bored tone._

_"You will figure that out one day." She replied with a venomous voice._

_"How non-descript." I replied simply. She giggling in her insane way, finding whatever I said funny. She eventually stopped and we simply stood in silence._

_"You know Umbra. You always want to be in control, to be the one that bends the chaos around her and uses it to gain power. Yet, you have that one thing controlling you, making you unable to feel emotions your subconscious mind feels. I find it quite perturbing to say the least. When I first examined through your memories those chain of events were locked so tight I could barely get them open. However, that one moment of insecurity. That one moment of feeling, of love. I could read them." She said into the fast silence. I felt my blood freeze and my muscles lock up._

_"Let me tell you, the way you attacked me. The way you flew into a blind rage and felt that primal urge to destroy.... It made me realize that deep down you are glass, and you posture yourself and lie to yourself so much that you genuinely believe at times that you are this strong person. This person that is in control and can make others fear her. You are not that, you are close but you are not able to reach that level just yet. I can give you that, Umbra. I can give you that control you desire so much." She finished._

_I could feel my fingers tighten and untighten as I fought myself. I wanted to attack her, but I knew that is what she wanted. She wanted me to prove to her that I am not in control, that I let the chaos through me and not let it be within my willpower. Yet, I found that her offer was ever so tempting, ever so delicious. Control, such a beautiful concept that barely any being on this Earth genuinely have. It is so easily ripped away, so easily taken and used against you. It flows through one person and moves on to the next, leaving the previous owner decimated and destroyed. The rich find themselves so easily tainted by its use and, eventually, are thrown around and used. The poor find that they can control, they can use it, but just like the rich it will move through the populous and leave everyone destroyed. There is no one class that can hold it forever, there is no imbalance. It is chaos and to control it is to be the catalyst of pure chaos._

_So I found myself wanting to turn and face her, to finally be the woman I so desired to be. In control, in power. Her seduction was so exhilarating, so desirable. "How?" I asked, buzzing with adrenaline._

_"You would just have to trust me." She said simply. No emotion in her voice, just an empty void. I couldn't derive anything from it, no hints or clues, just a straight coin flip. I fought with myself, mulling over the decision as many times I could. I would find myself switching between wanting to trust her, or forgoing the chance. It was exhilarating, simply wonderful. A 50/50, a coin flip, like picking between two cards - one life and one death. I could feel the tendrils of what I felt yesterday beginning to take hold, to shape me and use me. Then I realized. I wouldn't be in control, I would be lead to it by another and I had no say in it. I knew nothing of what she offered, except she promised me that I would become what I wanted to be. She was lying or misconstruing the truth, I was certain on it._

_"No." I gave my answer. She scoffed softly, and I tensed, expecting something like last time yet nothing came._

_"How curious. So strong-willed unlike the other one. I find myself enjoying it." She said icily. I forced myself not to shiver and reeled in my flight response. "I release you, but remember. My offer will always stand." She said in her inane child like voice. I then felt my stomach drop, as if I was falling a great distance._

I opened my eyes to yet another darkness. I felt grounded this time, like reality was gently holding me, unlike the freeing yet dangerous feeling of the void. I sat up as much as I could in the tiny space, cracking my joints in my hands as I began to shake the sleep from my limbs. I softly opened the tiny door into Sans' room. I heard a soft snore, answering my suspicions that he was still very much asleep. Unless he had something extremely important to do, he slept until after noon. However, I knew that the reason why was because he had uneasy nights and would always sleep late. There had been a few times I heard him rustling around in his bed, trying to find release from whatever plagued his subconscious, yet proving unable to. On rare occasions he would wake up in a jolt, sometimes falling onto the floor and breathing heavily. It made me feel upset for him, but I knew if I intervened it would either be a danger to one or both of us, or would embarrass him. So, I tuned down the want to help him and kept his secret to myself.

He then turned over, facing towards me. His eyes remained closed as he softly snored his dreams away. It was then I saw a light blue emanating from his shorts, and curiously I peered closer to see what it was. Of course, when I realized was I was indeed looking at I felt my cheeks heat up as I immediately turned away. Sans did say that some Monster's reproduced sexually, like humans, but he never said what he was. I imagined he would be one of the ones that produced asexually, seeing that he had no flesh and blood. However, I came to the conclusion that magic provided the need for an apparatus such as this one. After I got over my embarrassment for seeing such a thing, I found myself even more curious. Magic did a lot for Monsters, creating weapons or producing healing waves. Apparently, it was also a major component in some Monster species reproductive ability. The scientific side of me was infinitely curious to the ins and outs of such a thing and the normal part of me still found it somewhat curious. I had never interacted with a man in such a way, the ones of the Surface stayed very far away from me, apparently a rumor was started that I would seduce men and cut off their dicks as trophies. It was infinitely funny, seeing that I had no experience with men. However, I did have phallic shaped things inside of me, courtesy of _Her._ The experience itself was a mix of pleasure and pain, seeing that she had no care to how forcefully she would shove such objects inside of me.

_"Oh my little shadow, you will be fine. The way you cry from pain is so seducing, cry for me more..."_

I screamed at myself internally, forcing the memory and all thoughts pertaining to it out of my head. I looked back up to see that he still glowed softly from that area, and I found that my cheeks lit up in heat softly as I stared at the hidden object. I may have had no interaction with men before, but that did not mean I was not attracted to them. I found both genders equally pleasant to look at and fantasize over, but I simply never had the opportunity to explore the option. A primal part of me wanted to simply walk up to Sans and try my hand at seducing him. It would be easy to, how could he deny such an easy opportunity to engage in a primal need. Yet, I found myself hesitant. It is something _She_ would of done to me. Not ask if I was okay with initiating sexual intercourse and simply taking advantage of a weakened state of mind. Also, I did not know if he was attracted to me in such a way. I knew he cared deeply for me but was that based on simple friendship or did it have a deeper meaning? I did not know and did not want to test such a thing. I also thought back to if I even wanted to. Did I truly want to have Sans in such a way? It was... uncomfortable to say the least. I had not engaged in any sexual activity since _Her_ and I was terrified to try. I still felt sexual desire and needs, but to act on them with another person made me panic and run as far away as possible. I did not know if I simply just wanted to satiate some primal urge and it was trying to convince me to do something I truly did not want to do. So I decided that I wouldn't do anything and force down that urge. I still felt a longing, a need, and I wanted to groan in frustration as heat pooled between my legs. I reeled in my urges and forced myself to go back to a normal state. Eventually, I found that urge quieted down significantly, but I still looked on in fascination. It was an interesting thing to look at to say the least. Human male sexual organs did not glow, they were simply a mass of flesh and blood. Quite ordinary compared to the glowing appendage I stared at in child-like wonder. Eventually, I slowly got up from my spot in the closet and quietly made my way to the door. I opened and closed it as softly as I could and managed to not wake up the sleeping skeleton. I made my way down the stairs and into the kitchen. I poured myself some water and lapped thirstily at it, wanting to satiate my thirst I managed to acquire over the night.

"You drink like a horse." A sleepy deep voice said behind me. I managed to not scream surprisingly as I turned around and saw a extremely sleepy Sans yawning.

"Jesus fuck Sans." I quietly whisper-yelled at him. I sat down the cup and leaned against the counter as I rubbed at my eyes.

"Sorry. But I am trained to always wake up when my door opens, but you did good to not wake me up beforehand." He said as he leaned against the wall. I internally felt a sigh of relief knowing that he was not awake during my fascination over his sexual appendage.

"Yeah, but why did you follow me?" I asked as I looked at his bright eye-lights in the darkness.

"Oh for the same reason. Thirsty as hell." He replied as he walked over to the fridge and began to pour himself some water. I watched him as he did so, and thought to myself how his eye-lights could give him away.

"You know, your eye-lights are extremely bright." I told him as he began to drink.

He finished the cup with a soft sigh as he laid his own next to mine.

"I can turn them off if I want to, but I find that doing it makes people nervous." He said.

"Oh I see." I replied simply as I found that I had nothing else to say. The silence was awkward, at least for me, seeing that I had previously looked at his glowing dick. Sans merely looked at me, either finding the silence fine or he also found it awkward. With how dark it was I couldn't see his body posture or eye movements to make sure so I began to feel frustrated not being able to tell what he was thinking.

"It was a good thing you woke me up, though, I have to go to a Royal Guard meeting." He told me.

"There is one today?" I asked as I felt my anxiety go up slightly.

"Yeah, at least one a month, sometimes more if Undyne feels like we have to." He replied. I found myself hating that I wouldn't be there to back him up if he was discovered, but I believed his promise of returning to the house if it ever happened. Then we would run and hide, killing whoever came after us. **Murdering** those we dared try to hurt us. I shook my head and re-centered myself as I forced those thoughts away. "You okay?" I heard Sans' voice ask me.

"Yeah just a small headache." I lied easily. He looked at me curiously for a few moments before pouring himself more water.

"Well we got some time to kill before I have to leave. Anything you have in mind?" He inquired. I mulled over what we could do, trying to think of something that would pass the time without leaving the house.

"Can I ask you some things about magic?" I asked him.

"Um, yeah sure. Let me just finish this water and head back up to the room." He replied as he downed the glass into his internal void and began to move up to the room. I followed closely behind him, tip-toeing when we went by Papyrus' room and eventually found ourselves back in his room. We moved to sit on opposite sides of the bed, and he looked at me curiously, seemingly waiting for me to ask my questions.

"So how does your magic work?" I asked him earnestly.

"Oh, what specifically? Teleporting, gravity, blasters?" He tried to narrow down for me. I smiled gently and I saw realization hit his face at what he knew I was about to say.

"Everything, what do you take me for?" I asked cheekily.

"An irritating human." He grumbled. I pelted him with a sock and he laughed softly as he batted it away mid air. "Alright, alright!" He said as he cleared his throat and began his explanation.

"Basically, my family has an expertise in void magic. The void is a space in-between realities and we can manipulate it. From it, we can control gravity and other forces similar to it. Teleportation is simply me creating a worm-hole in-between the void and reality and passing through it. I traverse the void in instantaneous speed, considering that the void does not follow the principles and laws of reality, there is no limitation on speed and I can travel faster than the speed of light. The only limitation is that I had to of been to the place before and it takes a good bit of magic to cast. The memory of the environment allows me to land in a safe space and not in-between a wall or in the ground. Gravity is more complicated. Simply put I make an area take on void like qualities, where I can control the space in which I envelope the spell. It's basically a bubble with no other mass for gravity to interact with, thus making gravity unable to be a thing since the only thing that could pull on you is a mass greater than yourself, which there is none. I can control all mass within the bubble, making them gain or lose velocity and speed. Lastly, blasters are basically light beams. About the same temperature of our Sun, contained in a field so that the heat cannot interact with the environment other than within that field. However, the reason why the blasters take on their shape in unknown to us. Speaking of that, I can also control and manipulate bones. I can make them appear and disappear. I don't think you have ever seen me do that before, but it's basically our race's weapon shape. They are mostly used as projectiles." He finished. I mulled over what he told me, trying to find any questions and finding myself satisfied by his answer. It was a lot of information and I lapped it up happily.

"So does Papyrus have the same abilities?" I asked him.

"To an extent. He cannot teleport or cast a sustainable blaster. But his control of bone attacks and gravity are a lot more precise than my own. He lacks raw power but makes up for it in precision. For example, my gravity fields are quite large and I cannot single out someone in a group, but Papyrus can. However, he cannot throw them as far as I can or as forcefully. Surprisingly, his bone attacks have an additional ability that mine do not possess. He can make certain bones deal damage if the person is moving through them or staying still. It can be quite confusing to deal with if they are coming in rapid succession and changing throughout the attacks." Sans said with a proud voice. I smiled as I heard his pride over his brother, finding that I hardly ever heard such a thing before. The Surface was mostly people looking out for themselves. Pride for another was a rarity as most of the pride was associated with people's own successes.

"I find it interesting that magic is associated with family, it gives it a sense of rarity." I said.

"Well magic itself is a rarity now, so we cherish it and try to teach others our own talents if they are able. Unfortunately, you need a connection to the void to be able to use our magic, so we have yet to find another Monster to be able to wield our magic." Sans responded.

"All the more reason to stay alive, no?" I said with a smile on my face.

"Ah yes, finally, I found the sole reason to keep living." He said with a sarcastic tone. I one again pelted him with a sock, but it along with myself started floating in the air. Some other clothes and the blanket on the bed started floating as well, joining me in my weightlessness. It was an odd feeling, having nothing to be attached to. There was no feeling of falling, considering that I could not fall.

"This is... strange." I said questioningly as I moved around in the bubble, finding that I could reach out of it and immediately feel the gravity on my arm. I looked over to Sans to see his left eye wisping blue, tiny tendrils of blue mist joining the air after moving for a few seconds. I then felt my body being moved around gently, and eventually found myself back on the bed. Then his eye returned back to its normal state and I immediately felt gravity on me. It was strange at first, feeling the pull towards the ground, but eventually my body got used to it and I no longer felt it.

"I think that was enjoyable?" I said in a questioning tone. Sans chuckled softly as he leaned back against his pillow.

"Strangely enough, most who got to experience that said that exact same thing in that exact same tone." He answered.

"Well, now I don't feel special anymore. I believed I was your first, it totally takes away from the experience." I said with a wink. I expected him to flush or fluster for a moment like he usually does, but I was met with a stone faced smile. "Well, you finally learned that it's no fun when you don't fluster around like a virgin." I said with a sigh.

"And how would you know how a non-virgin would react?" Sans questioned.

"Well, considering that I am not a virgin I think I know plenty." I answered with a cocked eyebrow. I saw something flicker in Sans' eyes, but I could not tell what exactly it was.

"Oh, how was that?" He asked me genuinely. I felt my stomach drop as I did not know how to answer that question. For the most part, every encounter with _Her_ had been un-enjoyable on my end. But how could I tell Sans the truth without him wanting further elaboration?

"It was fine." I lied simply. Sans' eyes narrowed as he looked at me, and I knew he caught me in the lie. However, he did not push on it and just closed his eyes a leaned back.

"Well that's good, at least. I have yet to... experience... such as thing." He said with a slight blue tinge to his cheeks.

"Well from what I heard, casual sex between Monsters doesn't seem to be a thing. It seems you guys only choose one person for your whole life, romantically and sexually." I replied to him.

"Well in most cases that is true. You can fall out of love with a Monster and leave them. But in most cases you find the one you want to be with and that usually is the only experience you will have. Considering that seeing each other's soul is a major thing in romantic relationships between Monsters, you don't take relationships lightly." He elaborated further. I nodded and leaned back against the wall. I then closed my eyes and appreciated the silence. I was relieved that Sans did not want further explanation or didn't want to tell me he knew I was lying. However, I knew that one day it would come up and I knew that one day it would be hard to tell him. I internally groaned as I did not want to be reminded of _Her._ The way her sickly voice would seduce me over and over. Convince me to do things I did not want to do... I shivered as I felt bile rise up to my throat. I opened my eyes to see Sans watching me with concern. I quickly got up and moved to the door.

"I think I'm going to take a shower, and I think it's about that time to have fun with Undyne." I said as I turned to face him. He sighed as he too got up from his position on the bed and stood in front of me. I found that my heart fluttered at our closeness but I chocked it up to the experience I had when I woke up.

"Alright, stay safe or I'll throw you off a cliff." He said gently as he bent down to envelope me in a hug. I breathed in his forest scent and sighed softly.

"You better stay safe too or ill break your fingers." I replied. He laughed gently as he exited the hug and looked at me fondly,

"See ya later." He said as he popped out of existence. I let out a breath as I turned back to the door and headed to the shower to pass the time and think about how my exciting day went so far.

* * *

I popped into existence outside of Undyne's house. She held training right in her front yard and I saw about a dozen or so Monsters standing single file in front of the face shaped house. I lazily walked up and realized that these were completely new editions to the ranks of the Royal Guard. I recognized none of these people and they stared at me incredulously, considering that I had no armor or any weapons on me. I merely stood at the far end of the line, and waited for Undyne to make her appearance.

It took a few minutes but she came barging out of her door, decked out in her armor and had a grimace on her face as she stared at the Royal Guard. "Sup worms. Today we are training for battles, and not formal ones. I know that most of you know how the formal battle system works, but Humans will never let you initiate it willingly. So we will be training in the less formal version." She said as she walked up and down the ranks. Her eyes eventually saw me and her grimace turned into a wide grin. "I'm sure you have noticed Sans. He has personally fought against the Human scum and studied them in a physical and mental nature. He will be helping me teach you how to fight against them and to succeed without getting killed in the process." She finished. I felt many eyes on me, some with incredulity within them. I merely yawned as I waited for Undyne to continue. "Any volunteers to see if Sans has gotten lazy since the last he fought?" She asked the line. I almost laughed as the last time I fought someone it resulted in Undyne's death.

"I will sir." Answered a harsh feminine voice. I allowed my eyes to see my future opponent and to ascertain what I faced. It was a large, muscular Monster with wood-like skin. Her hair was a mass of twigs with the occasional green leaf. Other than that, the only other feature was that she had breasts like a human woman, and her voice, while harsh, was indeed a feminine one.

"Alright, Arbora. Everyone stand back a good twenty feet." Undyne said with a laugh in her voice.

After a minute, Arbora and I stood opposite of each other by a good ten feet. Her teeth were bared as she stared at me, and the gleam in her eyes told me that she had something to prove. She had a lighter armor on, mostly made of leather. I looked her over, determining that she had superior physical strength over me and her twig like fingers ended in sharp talons. I had the height advantage and I assumed that I also had a speed advantage. Unfortunately, I couldn't determine anything else because we were not in a formal battle, but your eyes are as good of a determination of a person's strengths and weaknesses as magic could. However, with Monsters and all the kids that fell down, you always had to exercise caution because you never knew what type of magic a person could wield. Fortunately for me, I am not like Undyne and everyone knows what I can do. I was in the back-lines during the last two Human's times here. And now that I was helping Umbra and I could very well find myself battling against these very same people, I couldn't reveal too much about my magic. Then Undyne's guttural voice broke my thoughts, "Begin!" She screamed.

Arbora started throwing glowing orange axes at me and I almost laughed at the irony. I dodged them simply enough, as I always felt my dodging was my greatest skill. She grunted and started running towards me, large tendrils of roots started shooting out from the ground, trying to trip me as I dodged one of her axes. She closed the distance and gave a powerful hack towards my neck, but I managed to squat down and summon a sharp femur like bone to pierce her stomach. She flinched softly, but didn't seem to take much damage from my attack. Then I saw her muscles tense up, I back-stepped as much as I could before her preconceived axe could meet me. She roared as she tried to close the distance between us again, but her attacks were sluggish and had no agility or thought put into them. I dodged yet again and back-peddled a safer distance as I thought of a solution. I then summoned another femur, this time enhancing its size to be able to put more weight behind the swing I was trying to do. I managed to make the side of it sharp and it was massive in my hands. Arbora then summoned two more axes, they curved from her and tried to meet me on opposite sides, I ducked and quickly rushed to her position. Vines tried to trip me over but I gracefully dodged them as I hacked into her side. I did significantly more damage as I hit her. The left side of her torso was cut into as it splintered and cracked under the blow. Sap-like blood pooled from the wound as she dropped to her knees, she then tried to slash at me with her talons as I walked backward and looked to Undyne. Undyne nodded softly, "Sans wins. Medics heal Arbora, she fought well." Undyne called from her position. She then started walking towards me. "You did well Sans, but I know you could of ended it a lot sooner. Any reason in particular that you only used the most basic of your abilities?" She questioned me as the other Royal Guardsmen were focused on Arbora. I shrugged as I answered,

"Keep them guessing." She laughed harshly as she clapped me on the shoulder.

"You know, you might actually help these suckers." She said as she looked onto the panicked Monsters. "However, I know this is not what you expected. Helping out newbies. But I do have a meeting for the higher level guardsmen in two days. Fortunately for you, it won't be combat orientated, but you will be teaching them about Human's" Undyne explained.

"Well, It sounds like I am going to be busy until the Human is found." I responded. Undyne laughed in a softer tone then became silent.

"It's the last one. The last Human to fall and we will be set free from this prison. Then... we can wage war a take our revenge." Undyne said in a vicious whisper. I managed to not kill her then and there, as my fists clenched and shook gently.

"Yeah, one last Human." I echoed softly. We both stood in silence for a few moments, before another recruit, one that was long, lanky, and covered in a short brown fur.

"Arbora will be fine, we managed to heal her, but she needs to rest for a day to recover magically." He said to Undyne in a soft tone.

"Good, tell her she can take tomorrow off to rest. Dismissed." Undyne commanded. The brown, fur-covered, monster saluted quickly and went back to where the other guardsmen congregated. "They are eager to get this done and move on to the rest of the reserves. Monsterkind knows that we are close to being free and know that after we must fight for our freedom." Undyne told me.

"Yet, I find myself uneasy. Humans are more equipped for war than we are. Perhaps it would be smarter to try and co-exist." I suggested to her. She merely laughed darkly in response.

"You know that they would never accept us, they would see us and automatically assume the worst." She countered.

"So just die fighting without the chance to live?" I suggested.

"Better to die united and fighting." Undyne responded. I flinched from how similar Undyne and Umbra sounded. It was the same phrase, excepted worded slightly differently. I could come up with a million other ways to try and gain the Human's favor and live in relative peace, yet I knew there would always be fighting. There would always be the ones that were greedy or bigoted. However, I knew some Human's would accept us and would try to fight for us, but I knew that would be a minority compared to the one's that didn't care or would hate us. It was a difficult situation to be sure, but I hoped that I could sway Asgore or Undyne into at least trying for peace. I knew that Undyne cared for us a lot, but her vengeance overruled any sense she could conjure up. I sighed as I looked on in silence.

The rest of the day went well, Undyne taught the recruits ways to use less magic for their attacks and some basic parries and dodges you could do. The Monsters in question were eager and lapped up her teachings easily. I knew that I was potentially helping these Monster's able to kill Umbra that much easier, but even though I barely saw Umbra's fighting ability, she was capable of wiping the floor with any of those recruits. I sighed and thought that I should probably teach Umbra the fighting techniques of Asgore and Undyne. It would help, for the inevitable battle against those two. I shivered as I thought of the potential deaths Umbra could face, but I would be there to help her. I would always be there.

The recruits filed out of Undyne's yard and I found myself to be the only one left. Undyne walked towards me slowly, when she reached me she sighed and rubbed her temples.

"I love their eagerness, but sometimes I think of how these very same Monsters could die." Undyne said. I nodded gently but said nothing in response. "Anyways, I guess I'll see you in two days for the Elite Guardsmen meeting. It's at twelve-o-clock." She said with a toothy smile.

"Yeah, I'll be there. I'm going to go home and pass out." I responded. She nodded and turned around and began to walk back to her house. After she went back inside I popped back to my room.

I found Umbra sleeping on my bed, only the sound of her breaths leaving her body. Her chest rose and fell in a gentle way as her face was barren of any focused features. Then my eyes roamed down and noticed how hiked up her shirt was. I had a full view of her stomach, it was flat with light muscles visible. I could see her full hips dip into the curve of her waist and extend outward when it reached her rib-cage. I saw some light scars covering her stomach, mostly light slashes.

I stared on in wonder as I felt arousal peak inside of me. My soul lurched and sang as my mind created visions from the imagine before me. Of me touching her skin, trailing kisses up and down her naval, gripping her flesh and tugging on her hair. I barely noticed how my breathing became harder and rougher as unclenched and clenched my hands. I realized then and there that I had to get out of that room. As quietly as I could I tip-toed past Umbra and quickly made my way to the bathroom.

* * *

I awoke after hearing the door shut softly and realized Sans must be home. I yawned and sat up from my position on the bed and rubbed the sleep from my eyes. I found that taking naps on Sans' bed was much better than the sleeping bag setup that was present in my little sleeping room. I leaned back against the wall and picked up the book I was reading before I passed out. It was a history book that outlined how Monster's interacted with Humans before the war and it lead up to about two-hundred years ago when the Queen of Monsters vanished. I was currently still on the war between Monsters and Humans and I quickly realized that Sans was right in his explanation of how Monsters lacked Determination The King and Queen were both hesitant to fight back against the Humans, even though they were killing all Monsters they came across. At the time, Monsters did not practice fighting in the slightest and they had no one that was trained to fight. So they simply complied as much as they could and eventually were driven Underground and the Human mages cast a spell that they couldn't have any means to counter. Of course, the Human mages did not have the foresight that there could be openings in the Underground to where Humans could fall down and give them the chance to escape their prison. I sighed as I opened the book and began to read more,

_After being driven from the Surface, we explored our new home. We found that we had a wide array of environments for multiple different types of Monsters to live in and were glad that at least some aquatic and extreme living Monster types would not die out. A lot of Monsters that did not require heat or did not feel the cold took up residence in Snowdin, making sure that other Monsters that needed warm or hot weather had the ability to live there without overcrowding. Most Monsters wanted to live in Waterfall, given the beauty of the place, but the King ordered that aquatic type and Monsters that needed lots of water went there first. The majority of the Monsters took residence in "New Home" along with the King and Queen. The problem of carnivorous Monsters was highly concerning, given the fact that there were barely any animals. To make up for this, we made sure that all Monsters that did not require meat were unable to eat it by making it illegal. Breeding grounds of what little animals that lived down here became prevalent and were made a top priority by the King and Queen. In a couple of years the problem was remedied and the ban was lifted."_

The door opened and Sans entered the room. He flinched softly when he saw me and I noticed that his cheeks turned a soft, barely noticeable shade of blue. "Oh sorry, I thought you were asleep." He said as he sat down on the bed. I closed the book, making sure to mark my place as I looked at him questioningly.

"You woke me up when the door closed, how was your day?" I asked him.

"Oh, Undyne was teaching newbies fighting techniques and stuff. At the beginning she let one of them fight me, but she was easy to beat." He answered. I cocked my head as I heard him talk about it,

"I thought it was like an elite meeting or something?" I questioned.

"I did too, but I'm going to one in two days so it really doesn't matter." He said. I hummed in response, feeling anxiety in my gut but I quickly swallowed it down. "But those Monsters are eager, apparently hearing about you drove them to get training. Undyne is saying that we are going to war right when the barrier opens, even though she knows it will result in our extinction." He said with anger in his voice.

"But if she knows it will kill you all, why does she go through with it?" I asked him incredulously.

"Her vengeance is so great that she will not listen to reason. I hope that I am able to convince Asgore and her to let off the immediate war thing and at least _attempt_ peace." He said with a growl. I nodded as I clasped my hands in front of me. "However, I think it's time that I taught you some things about Undyne and Asgore, considering that you will definitely come to fighting them one day." Sans said while scooting closer to me.

"Alright, let hear it." I answered eagerly. He cleared his throat as he began,

"Lets start with Undyne since you know more about her. She is extremely strong and can conjure spears using magic. I believe she can conjure up to ten spears at the same time to rush her opponents. She is relatively fast, but she doesn't focus on training her agility. Her greatest weakness is her straight-forwardness and her inability to dodge properly. So, whenever you try to hit her, make sure its a good shot because she might not be able to dodge it." I nodded softly, embedding the information into my mind as I thought about how I could of done the fight with her differently if I knew this information. "Asgore is a huge guy. About nine feet tall, very broad, and very strong. He can cast fire magic and wields a physical trident. Because of this, he does not rely on his magic as much during fights, so enduring him is pretty much out of the question. However, his size makes him have the same problems as Undyne. He can't dodge easily, but he can take a hit better than any Monster in the Underground. So when you attack him you pretty much have to go for the kill, because wearing him down and making him bleed out is out of the question. But, since he can't dodge, going for muscles and tendons would be a good idea to limit his movement further." Sans finished. I sighed as I leaned back against the wall. Thinking about all the different ways I could go about fighting those two. It would be difficult, I knew that much, but I knew I could do it if I tried hard enough. Plus I had Sans.

"Well whenever that happens, we will have each other, right?" I asked him with a smile on my face. He grinned as well and had this warm sincere look in his eyes,

"Till the day I turn to dust." He replied.

I leaned forward and hugged him tightly, enjoying his scent on my nose. I released us from the embrace and yawned as I felt the urge to sleep return to me. Sans laughed and poked his finger in my yawning chasm. I bit down on his finger and he yelped as I let the digit go and grinned a toothy smile.

"It's what you get." I said with a smirk. He shook his hand and looked over the digit with faux worry.

"Get off of my bed and go to sleep in your tiny space you mean Human." He sad with a pout in his voice. I laughed loudly as I lightly hit his shoulder.

"Alright, but no more poking fingers in holes." I said with a wink. He looked at me with a bored expression, seemingly unamused but I knew he was forcing himself to do it so I couldn't get a reaction. "No fun." I said, mirroring his pout from earlier and crossed my arms across my chest.

"You won't get me anymore you wicked woman." He said with a Cheshire grin.

"One day, it will happen again I swear it." I told him as I turned around and walked toward the closet.

"Oh it that a bet?" He asked. I turned around and smiled sickly sweet at him,

"It's a promise."


	17. The Elite Few

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have drawn Umbra for those who want a visual representation of her. I am not, nor do I consider myself an artist. I don't draw much anymore and have almost given up on it entirely. However, I got the desire to draw and decided drawing Umbra and giving the readers a chance to see how I envision her would be great! https://imgur.com/a/IVFLA80

I sighed as I sat up from my bed. Nightmares plagued my dreams and I was unable to get a decent sleep. I looked over to where Umbra's room and remembered yesterday. We hung out and talked about magic and a few of the Elite Guardsmen while eating pizza and hot-dogs. Umbra had an insane thirst for knowledge, especially regarding history, magic, and tactics. If she lived during the time when Monsters and Humans coexisted, I would of feared her prowess in battle. She has an extensive knowledge in basic anatomy. Of where to strike to incapacitate and to make her opponents bleed out within seconds. Monsters are mostly made of magic, but some of the more humanoid ones have muscles structures similar to Humans, along with the addition of blood, which similar to human blood, carries important resources throughout the body. I explained to her how some Monsters are more organic that others, and some Monsters barely have any tissue or structure and are mostly composed of magic. Monsters that are more organic tend to be more powerful physically and are quicker to think and act than some of the more magical Monsters. However, in compensation, they are less magically powered and are easier to kill in physical terms.

I rubbed my temples as I slowly got up from the bed. I fucking hated getting up early. It is a crime that people think we should get up at this time of the day. Why couldn't we do this much, much later?

I avoided cracking my back and knuckles, not wanting to wake Umbra up with the gunshots of air in-between my join fluids. I tip-toed out of the room and went down to the kitchen to get something light to eat. You never knew with Undyne what you were going to do that day, so eating light compared to heavy was the best choice to avoid retching your insides to the outside. I reached the kitchen after tip-toeing beside Papyrus' room and avoiding the creaks in the stairs. I opened the fridge to see some hot-dogs left from yesterday and eagerly grabbed two. Of course, also grabbing the whole bottle of ketchup to go along with my breakfast. There I sat in the darkness eating hot-dogs and in between bites shooting a cup of ketchup into my mouth. The day so far was going along swimmingly, except I knew the horror that awaited me in about thirty minutes.

I let out a sigh of relief, feeling somewhat stuffed from one of the best cuisines in the world. I slowly made my way back to my room, and was not surprised to find Umbra sitting on the bed, eyes puffy from sleep. "You getting ready to leave?" She asked me with a tired voice. I restrained myself from laughing at the sight of her disheveled hair and lax expression caused by sleep. It was an enjoyable thing to witness, as she usually looked so alert and ready. While she didn't care too much about what people thought of her, she did take measures to make sure she looked presentable. Not with a mass of make-up or hours spent in the bathroom mirror, but a general look of care that made her all the more intimidating.

"Yes, you porcupine." I said with humor in my voice. She scowled and brushed through her hair with her fingers.

"As you are the only person that has ever seen me like this and lived, consider yourself lucky." She said with a hiss. I laughed at her remark and wiped tears from my eyes.

"I'm sure if I had hair then I would look thirty times worse than you do." I reassured her as she was moving for a sock.

"More like fifty.." She grumbled as she leaned back against the pillow. "I wish there was I way I could disguise myself and go in there. I really feel like fighting someone." She said while yawning.

"And why is that?" I questioned.

"Well, we both know that we are going to have to fight someone again, sooner rather than later. I don't want to get out of practice and get both of us killed because of it. Also, I somewhat miss it. The exhilaration, the pressure." She answered. She stared into my eyes, and I saw nothing but sincerity within them. It sort of worried me that she missed fighting, but coming from her upbringing I don't think I could fault it. I sighed as I came to the only answer I could give her.

"You could practice with me. I'm no Undyne or Asgore, and it won't be like the real thing since we can't hurt each other, but it's still practice." I suggested. Her features lit up as she sat up from her position.

"Okay, but where?" She asked. Oh shit. That's right there's fuckin guards everywhere.

"Shit, I didn't think about that. I'll see what I can do though." I said, trying to think of any place that would be safe enough to practice in.

"Well, tell me if you think of anything while you're avoiding death today." She said with a scowl, clearly not enjoying today's plans. Of course, she hated it whenever I was out of sight or not in the next room over anyways.

"Don't worry. I promised I would teleport immediately if they find out anything. That also reminds me, we need to get you to another star so you can maintain the progress we have made." I told her. She nodded as she leaned back against the pillow again, closing her eyes and breathing lightly.

Flowey's threat worried me. If Umbra didn't kill someone he would tell Undyne, but if she did then he probably would urge her to do it more just to satisfy his perverted sense of reality. Yesterday, Umbra even suggested to just go out and kill someone, like a guard, to make sure we had more time. If she were anyone else. I'm sure I would of been completely repulsed by the idea, but I found myself surprised that I even somewhat agreed. Of course, I said no, with an embellishment, and she just nodded with a funny look on her face and didn't speak of it again. A little part of me despised myself for even thinking that we should do it, but the self preservation and want to keep Umbra out of harms way battled with my sense of morality. Yet, I have noticed that one major difference between Umbra and I was our senses of moralities. Umbra wouldn't go out and kill another person to suit her fancy, or hurt someone for no reason. However, if it proved to be beneficial or important enough she would do it without hesitation. She just... didn't care. I don't blame her for it, nor fault her. Yet, she looked at me weirdly when I was so against killing someone to satisfy Flowey and give us more time. I still held life too highly, even if it meant my own demise or it would impair my life. After helping in the deaths of two children... I couldn't imagine just killing so easily. She didn't fault me for it, I think. She just thought I still clung to morality a little too much and was weirded out by it. Considering she had no one but herself and the maggots that haunted her life, I think seeing someone actually care for another life, even if it is someone you don't even know, kind of shocked her. It was then I noticed that she was staring at me quizzically, and I reprimanded myself for getting lost in my thoughts. "Sorry, but I should probably get going soon." I said, noticing the slight dissatisfaction in her eyes. I refrained from chuckling out loud, but I had a feeling of appreciation for her concerns. I also found her constant dissatisfaction from me leaving, even if it was a small outing to get food, amusing to witness.

"Alright, but you promise me to kick their asses a little too hard if Undyne wants you to fight them for practice or whatever she thinks it is. I'm under the belief she does it to tickle her own fancy." She told me. I chuckled softly,

"You know, I think I'm under the same belief as you." I added. She grinned a soft smile and returned my laughter. I hated leaving this. This amazing time I had with her was a dream and leaving to go satisfy Asgore and Undyne was like being thrust into a nightmare. But I re-steeled myself and gained control over my emotions. This is the only way, the only chance of Umbra getting out of this alive. She knew it, I knew it, and unfortunately I think Flowey knows it too.

"Okay, stay safe. Try to have fun in this little room and quick forays into the kitchen." I said with a cheeky smile.

"Have fun getting your ass kicked by strong magical Monsters." She said, returning the smile tenfold.

_"Well damn she got me there." I thought._

I smiled gently at her and quickly popped out of existence. I was not letting her get the satisfaction of winning that verbal battle.

* * *

I chuckled softly as he quickly left, knowing exactly why. Yet, it quickly faded as I noticed how his absence cut a little of the warmth and light out. Like the Sun became overshadowed by thick, rain-heavy clouds. Humor escaped me and I was quickly thrust back into a similar, albeit significantly reduced feeling of emptiness that I would normally experience on the Surface.

Ironically, I found my namesake fitting for the little analogy. A shadow overtaking the light and plunging warm into cold darkness. How humorous. It was then I felt a little tug on my mind, like there was something else I was forgetting. Sans.... Sine... Sanz.... Empty - absence. I laughed gently, figuring that the world had some sort of cruel humor. Sans comes from the Latin world Sine, which then became the Old French world Sanz, and now finally Sans. I chuckled softly, maybe his father knew? Yet, he would of named his child from a word meaning empty, nothing, absence. No, there had to be some other meaning as I would not think someone so cruel to do that to their child knowingly.

I sighed softly, closing my eyes and relaxing in the bed. I knew that Sans had problems, especially to those pertaining of the mind. Depression, anxiety issues, self-image issues, most likely PTSD, among some more. I chuckled at the cruelness of his namesake, even though I knew few would ever understand it. Empty - an empty man that has seen too much. The emptiness of the soul, having killed children no older than twelve. Of course, it was in self defense. He had said before that the one kid went on a killing rampage, murdering Monsters without a care. Then, there was the other. The girl he simply called Justice. For some reason, I felt her death was more impactful on his life than the little boy's. I frowned softly, not understanding how someone could let themselves get so hung up on something. Of course, I knew why. Emotions were a fickle thing, grief, anger, and most of all - guilt. Guilt played on your deepest, most precious emotions. Your humanity, your love, your anger - it used those up and made you feel one of the worst emotions known to man. Guilt killed people, guilt tore apart rationality, it made the strongest person turn to the weakest. I only ever felt the emotion when I thought of _Her._ How I let myself be weak and let her twist her envenomed claws into my heart. I felt my fingers tighten in anger and I quickly tried to calm myself down. Deep breaths - forget.

I groaned softly and turned to my side, staring at the wall. Sans still had his humanity, his full range of emotions. His guilt for killing someone was something I simply could not understand on the level he felt it. I cannot blame him for it, as it was something out of his control. I found that I was somewhat... disappointed. One difference in a vast sea of similarities. My heart twinged in a mix of sadness and self-hate. I knew these were irrational emotions, and they only served to cause conflict, yet as I held my hand to my heart I felt an emotion I did not know how to describe. Disappointment was the closest word. Disappointment in the cruel world above me that twisted my humanity into a shadow of itself. I wanted to laugh at the cruel irony, the cruel world. Umbra - The Emotionless Shadow, a shadow of humanity given human form.

I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth, hating how this cruel world toyed with me so. So I stayed laying - seething. I stayed for what seemed like hours, feeling that mixture of sadness, hatred, and disappointment. I wanted to plot my revenge against the world, I was determined to prove them wrong and prove myself as superior. A child's laughter filtered through the cloud of irrationality my mind produced. It ringed across my mind, echoing and relaying its grounding reality. It was then I realized, I had already proven the world wrong. Sans - No longer empty. Umbra - No longer emotionless. I laughed cruelly in appreciation for this newfound discovery. How delectable was it that two of the most fucked up people in the world were the only one's that could fix each other. To bring the sunlight to a shadow and to bring fulfillment to an empty person. I brought the colors of Determination, all red and all that an empty person needs. He brought the sunlight to my shadows, revealing what little humanity I had left in the darkest recesses of my mind. He brought emotions I was too afraid, and I am still too afraid to feel.

I smiled softly, thinking of how I unknowingly out-smarted this cruel world. I closed my eyes and breathed out a sigh of relief, loving how even though Sans was not here he could still bring the sunlight to my darkest demons.

For the first time I dreamed of the sunlight, and how it saved me from the depths of darkness.

* * *

Once again I found myself in front of Undyne's home. However, instead of a line of recruits I witnessed five disciplined, highly trained guards standing in line, not even moving a muscle. I gritted my teeth and moved to the end of the line, this time appearing slightly more determined instead of completely lax and lazy. Some still shot glances at me, my reputation of being a highly lazy sentry seemingly not going unnoticed. I only recognized two of the five here, Aecor and Caeli. Aecor was an aquatic Monster, much like Undyne. He had fins on the top of his head, like double mohawks. His scales reflected a deep blue, and shimmered under any light a brilliant way. He had a scar across the his right cheek, under his deep sea green eyes. Like Undyne, he had shark teeth, serrated and pointy. His magic manifested in the form of a harpoon, where he could launch a spear and a magical chain would pull either himself or his target to each other. His secret though, was that his teeth or nails secreted a venom that would attack his targets nervous system, rendering them paralyzed after a few minutes. Aecor was a strong-headed, albeit quiet man. He did as he was told and did it well. He was one of the Elite Guardsmen I talked about, along with Caeli.

Caeli had a beautiful rounded face, soft and light. She was covered in a delicate white plum of feathers, her hair was simply a darker grey of feathers that ended at her shoulders. Her fingers extended into dangerous talons, as did her feet. She had angelic wings sprouting from her back, near her shoulder blades. Her magic manifested in a long bow with magical arrows that honed in on her targets. She was also adept at fire magic, although not as strong as the King or Queen were. I believe her sub-species of Monsters were the origins of Harpies in Human mythology as she certainly looked the part.

I looked over the other Elite Guardsmen I did not know. There was a bull-like man, large horns sprouted from his head and every breath he took shook misted the air from his nostrils. Then there was a tree-like woman, much like Arbora from a few days ago. I wouldn't be surprised if they were related, as they looked very similar. The only differences were a slightly different face, and the way her twigs of hair sprouted pink flowers. Lastly, there was this lizard-type looking man. His scales were a dusty bronze, and he had a thin medium length tail. Spikes started from the top of his nose down to the tip of said tail, surprisingly dazzling white and very pointy. Most surprising, however, was the fact he carried actual weapons. On his waist, he carried two daggers. One slightly longer than the other, and both looked well kept. Monsters generally don't carry or make weapons as our natural defense is magic, therefore we almost always rely on it in it's entirety. He somehow reminded me of Umbra wit the way their weapons of choice were the exact same.

It was then I heard a loud bang as Undyne came out of her house. "Hello, better worms! Welcome to the second meeting of the Elite Guard. As you can see, we have a new member. Some of you may recognize him from your previous ventures with the Guard, and some of you might recognize him from his lazy ass reputation. Would you like to introduce yourself to those who don't know of your previous occupation?" Undyne introduced. I nodded quickly as I went to stand beside her, the looks the three gave me earlier were much more hidden now, but I could see it from a mile away.

"My name is Sans. I used to work as a Royal Scientist under the New Technologies division, until Asgore noticed my knowledge on Human Behavior. After that, he placed me in the Royal Guard to help hunt, kill, or capture Humans. He has asked me to teach you the inner workings of a Human mind to better defend yourself and to better capture one." I told them somewhat icily. I already knew they were not going to like me, at the three new ones. They worked hard for their position and I was coming in, seemingly, without any experience. I grinned internally when I noticed their features harden even more, as I already knew where this was going to lead. It seems Undyne also knew because she immediately spoke up after I was done,

"Well, it seems since we have a new arrival that some of you would like to test him. Any volunteers?" She asked. For a moment, no one spoke up, but a deep baritone interrupted the silence,

"I will." The voice came from the Bull-like man. His footsteps echoed across the floor as Undyne nodded to both him and I and we took our places about ten feet from each other. I wanted to hold back as much as I could and reveal the least amount possible about my magic. Caeli and Aecor knew, but these three could do without some vital information.

"Formal or Informal, Undyne?" I asked her.

"Well, since you did Informal last time, we can do formal." She answered. I nodded at her quickly and returned my gaze to my opponent.

Much didn't change from informal or formal. The only change was that you could see statistics of your opponents soul, therefore giving you hints on what strategies to do. It also required both parties consent to do, as it involved your soul in the process. Lastly, you could only really kill someone if you absolutely desired it to happen. Your attacks would never damage someone enough to kill them, as long as you did not have intent to kill.

It was then I felt a tug on my soul, an invitation to participate in a formal duel. I accepted the tug with my own in return and saw my soul, or at least the white representation of it, come out into the world. I looked over his quickly, finding his stats to be mildly impressive.

**Attack - 60**

**Defense - 30**

**HP - 1500**

Overall, above average stats. However, his defense was significantly lower than his other stats, making that the target to play off of. It was then I heard him scoff, and I knew exactly why.

"You sure Undyne? His HP is only at 1." His deep baritone echoed across the cavern. The tree Monster gasped softly, while the lizard only stared.

"Oh I'm sure Taureus, try not to get too cocky." She answered in her raspy voice. He snorted as he turned back to face me and stared me down. I smiled lazily at him and put my hands into my hoodie pockets. "Begin!" Undyne shouted.

He immediatly charged towards me. Barreling at an impressive speed with his horns towards my body. I summoned a large bone from under my feet to gain height, and another one in the shape of a dagger. He charged into the bone and broke it with his strength. As I was tumbling down I managed to get on his back, I then stabbed some of the muscles in his shoulders and managed to mangle his right Deltoid. He howled and threw me off of his back, flinging me quite a great distance. I managed to somewhat land as gracefully as I could, feeling a sharp pain in my feet and legs. I gritted my teeth and noticed him charging me again, this time I side-stepped him and delivered a few quick slashes to his rips. He managed to growl as he summoned a yellow battle-axe. It was massive, easily came up to my own height, possibly even higher. He was pretty fast, as well as strong. I needed to keep my distance and strike when he overextends. He then charged at me again, his massive hooves shaking the ground as he barreled. I tried to side-step him again, but this time I felt pain on my left side. I looked down to see that a few of them were cracked and guessed that he managed to elbow me or hit me with his arm. I quickly looked up to see I was at .7 percent health and he was at 1000. I groaned softly at the sharp pain and heard his massive footsteps come towards me again. This time I ducked and managed to hit him a few times in the abdomen. I quickly got out from under him. His blood fell from his wounds in large droplets, it mixed with the cavern floor in a dark liquid. I glanced at his soul and saw he was only at 850 now. It was then I realized I couldn't do this until his health got too low, I would have to reveal a magical power. I tsked as he charged at me once more, raising his axe high above him. I held out my hand and let magic flow through me. He flailed in the air as he floated up, along with all the rocks and debris in the general area. I felt magic drain from me, much more than it felt with Undyne and Umbra. His mass was much higher than theirs, and thus it took more to influence it. I flung him as hard as I could to the wall on the right, hearing a crunch as some of his bones were broken. He got up slowly and started limping towards me, his right leg clearly broken. I easily dodged his attack, as it had no tact in it's power or technique. His movements were sluggish and it was noticeable he was losing more blood than he could manage.

"Stop!" Yelled Undyne's voice. Taureus flinched and looked towards Undyne. His breath came out ragged and I saw his limbs shake. "Sans has won the formal battle. Recall the representation of your souls and rescind the fight." Undyne said commandingly. Taureus scoffed as he recalled his soul into his body. I followed suit and immediately felt the affects of the battle. I placed a hand against my ribs and tried to heal it as much as I could. However, I could only heal two out of the six that were cracked. "Laminae, tend to their wounds. When you both are healed I will continue the meeting." Undyne said to us and re-entered her home. The tree-like Monster, Laminae I assumed, went to Taureus first and began to envelope him in a soft green light. It was then I noticed two bodies moving towards me,

"Sans, I'm glad you have decided to rejoin the Elite." Said a soothing female voice. I immediately recognized it as Caeli's and smiled softly at her. "Yeah I have rejoined, but it's only temporary. I am here until the Human gets captured." I answered her.

"Not after?" Said Aecor's gentle voice.

I groaned as I felt the sharp pain in my side,

"No, after this I'm done and I'm going to live the rest of my life in relative silence." I responded.

"A noble pursuit, Sans, but what of the war?" Caeli said. I frowned softly at the mention of war, hating the notion that we must, without question, enter war.

"I have helped kill enough in my lifetime to continue. If I am needed and we face extinction I will protect who I can, but I will not be an active member of the military." I answered. Caeli narrowed her eyes and nodded in a bird-like motion. Aecor simply hummed in response. Then, I heard footsteps towards us and recognized Laminae.

"I am Laminae, the head healer of the Elite. May I look at your wounds?" She said politely, in a sort of young voice. I nodded softly and immediately felt a gentle healing feeling. I sighed as I felt the experienced magic of a healer. It was quick and easy for her as she worked the green light over my injured ribs. "You are very strong, Sans. Why did you not start with that magic at first?" She asked me, her eyes concentrated over my ribs.

"I wanted to see if I could beat him without it." I answered her. She hummed in response as I felt the last of my pains go away.

"You are completely healed, Sans. I shall inform Undyne that you both are ready to continue." She said politely, even bowing her head slightly as she left our presence.

"Shes polite." I said simply. Caeli's bird-like laugh appeared,

"Yes she is. As what comes with expert healing, you have souls of kindness." She said. I hummed in response as I saw Laminae and Undyne exit the house.

"Alright. Sans is going to be teaching everyone the weaknesses and strengths of Humans. I suggest you listen carefully, as it could mean your life in the coming deaths." Undyne said with no room for argument as she nodded to me. I quickly made my way next to her and faced the people in front of me.

"Humans, as Undyne said, have weaknesses and strengths. I will be teaching you basic anatomy, their thought processes, and natural instincts. Let us begin with anatomy: A human does not have strong skin. Their skin is somewhat delicate and can be easily broken. Be that as it may, they can quickly heal from minor wounds as long as they keep pressure on the wound and bind it. They organically have a blood clotting system to stop blood-flow from killing them and their skin can scab over to prevent external bleeding. However, with major wounds they can easily die without treatment. There are a few spots in a Human where if you strike they will die within minutes or even seconds. Two of the easiest are the Jugular Veins on the side of the neck and the Femoral Artery on the inside of their thighs. If you strike these spots they will die within seconds or minutes depending on how bad the wounds are and the size of the Human. To go along with that: A human size affects their heart-rate. The smaller a human is, the faster they will bleed out as their heart pumps faster." I stopped and waited for questions. When none came I continued to the next lesson. "Now, let us talk about how strong a Human is. This factor varies based on genetics, diet, and how much exercise they complete. However, they can complete feats of strength without practice easily. Adrenaline is the hormone Human's produce during situations of near-death. Their muscles normally limit how much they can lift to limit damage done to muscles. However, when faced with eminent death, they remove this limit. Thus, when you corner a Human you need to be even more careful than ever before. It is a last defense and can easily save their life. Adrenaline can also remove their feeling of pain so they may focus on their survival." I paused again, and heard no questions. "Another is what Humans were born to do. They are endurance hunters, therefore meaning they can walk and run great distances without tiring. That is what they were evolved to be when they were game hunters. They still carry this with them. They are not the fastest, the strongest, nor have teeth and claws. However, they have one of the highest endurance's of any animal, including Monsters." I explained.

I carried on with my lesson, finding that they listened without a sound. Caeli and Aecor already knew this information, but they listened on anyways. Eventually, time flew by and it was time to head home. As everyone was leaving, Undyne grabbed me by the shoulder,

"Hey Sans. Starting two days from now, you will be meeting Alphys every other day. I will also inform you on Royal Guard meetings that you need to attend. We are planning for next week, but I will send you the time whenever we get it finalized." She said.

"Alright Undyne, let us hope it won't be for much longer." I told her. She nodded and smiled with a toothy grin,

"Definitely!" She said as she turned around and walked back into her house. I turned around and noticed no one else was in the cave, seemingly all have filed out and went home. I sighed as I walked forward, thinking of a place for Umbra and I to practice.

Then it hit me. The Mysterious Door. No one goes there, as they say it's haunted. I have been there myself and found nothing inside the room, just a small cavern. I grinned and thought of my room as I teleported there.

* * *

I heard a pop as Sans appeared in the middle of the room. I have gotten used to the sudden sound now, so I only flinched softly now at the intrusion. "Sup." I said casually.

"Sup." He answered back in the same tone. I narrowed my eyes as I studied his form. He looked normal but much more exhausted than normal.

"What happened?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing much. Pretty much went exactly how you predicted. Undyne wanted to see me fight one of them, big dude - huge battleaxe. And I won, obviously." He said quickly. I nodded softly with my eyes narrowed.

"You look exhausted." I commented.

"Well, I had to use my gravity magic and since he was a huge fucking guy I had to expend more magical stores. Also, he managed to hit my ribs and crack a few, that shit hurt." He replied with a smile.

"Getting sloppy Sans, even more of a reason to practice." I said mimicking his smile.

"About that, I think I know a place. It's in Snowdin, but no one goes there. Everyone believes its haunted or something, but I know the way in and it will be relatively safe. Also, we should probably get you to the first star you encountered in Snowdin tonight." He said. I nodded sharply as I got up from the bed. "Well, before we do that we should get Papyrus to mask your scent." He replied to my movements.

"Oh right. You have bloodhounds here." I said, rolling my eyes. Sans chuckled softly before motioning to follow him. We slowly walked from his room to the kitchen, finding Papyrus in his usual motions of making food.

"AH BROTHER, UMBRA. IS THERE SOMETHING YOU NEED? DINNER WILL BE READY IN ABOUT AN HOUR!" Papyrus said cheerfully.

"Well, we need you to mask Umbra's scent. There is something very important that we have to do and we don't want the dogs catching wind." Sans said with a wink.

"UGH! YOU ARE THE WORST, BROTHER! BUT I SHALL DO THIS FOR UMBRA AND NOT YOU!" He said exasperated. I felt purple magic envelope me. "ALRIGHT! YOU SHALL BE SCENT FREE FOR THE NEXT FIFTEEN MINUTES! I SUGGEST YOU DO WHAT YOU MUST WITHIN THAT TIMEFRAME!" He bellowed as he returned to his cooking.

"Alright, come here Umbra, let's get this over with." Sans told me. I nodded as I walked over to him and he embraced me softly. Then I felt the awful tugging feeling, then the next second my feet were on solid ground.

I found myself in a familiar spot. The trees were snow-capped and heavy with their burden. The snow whizzed by my face and a few flakes would attach to my skin and melt. My breath frosted the air and when I looked down I found a familiar golden, twinkling glow. It always pulled me, as if beckoning me and leading my soul to it. "Is it there?" Sans asked me, still holding on to me. I appreciated the warmth he radiated as this fucking cold was abysmal.

"Yeah, its right in front of us." I answered. I looked up to his face and found that his eyes were far off, as if trying to remember a distant memory. "You okay?" I asked him. He blinked and looked at me.

"Yeah, just a weird feeling. I think I had a powerful moment with a star before you reset the timeline, but it is escaping me." He responded softly. He then sighed as he let go of me. I found myself dissatisfied at the lack of warmth and the lack of Sans, but I knew the sooner I got this done the more warm I would be. I bent down and reached my hand out to touch the star. As my fingertips glanced it's surface I felt the returning feeling and the feeling of something leaving in my soul. Perhaps it was my soul attaching tiny pieces of itself to the star and that was how I was able to get back. I could only guess the theory behind it and I believed I would never truly find the answer, but that seemed like the best possible solution.

"Alright, I did it." I told Sans as I stood back up.

"Alright. You ready to go?" He asked me gently. I sighed as I looked down the path to where I first met Sans. My vision ended way before I could see the bridge we crossed together. I could almost see myself, distrusting yet interested. Constantly watching his every move and poised to defend myself if needed. And now, even though it has only been a few weeks, I had found the only person in the world that could make me happy. I trusted him without question - believed everything he told me. I have come to care about him, even though I had truly cared for no one else. I felt that if he had never showed up, I would of died a long time ago and stayed that way. I almost chuckled, thinking about how he ruined my plans. I climbed this mountain to die, only to be thrust in a world that wants to kill me. It was perfect, I would die to these Monsters and give them the chance of retribution, even though we all knew it would end in extinction for them. Then Toriel saved me from Flowey and taught me what she knew. Then I thrust myself into this snowy nightmare, to finally die, and Sans decided to become part of my life. Now I had no choice, I couldn't die.

I didn't want to anymore.

Why would one choose to die when they have their happiness now?

I looked to Sans and hugged him tightly. "We have come a long way, Sans." I said into his jacket. He chuckled softly and returned the hug,

"Even though it has only been a few weeks?" He questioned. I returned his chuckle,

"You wouldn't say so?" I retorted lightly.

"You have changed my life Umbra, for the better. I cannot imagine my life without you, as I would not be living anymore." He said seriously.

"And I feel the same way." I responded. I felt him flinch softly but thought nothing of it. We stood their hugging for what seemed like an eternity, completely enraptured in the moment. We both clung to each other, never wanting to let go, never wanting each other out of our sights. I was obsessed, enraptured by this. Every time he left I feared it would be the last time I saw him. That I would wake up from the orphanage and find none of this actually happened. That my mind made it all up to help me feel better, for even just a moment. So I clung to him, tighter than I ever had before. So tight that I was afraid I would mesh with him and create one being. I never wanted him to leave to go please his fucking stupid King. His King was unimportant, a fly compared to us. A little nuisance that thinks he is the mightiest, but he will experience the hardest fall, I will make sure of it. Everyday he risked Sans' life, he risked Sans to be taken away from me forever. I will **Kill** him slowly and make him **suffer.**

A child's laughter danced across my subconscious, pleased with my words as I feared I would never let Sans go. I didn't even feel the world fall out from under me as we teleported back to his room. I blinked softly as the embrace we held loosened. His scent enveloped me and played with my baser emotions and desires. I clenched my teeth as I tore those thoughts from my head and looked up at Sans. I saw... something in his eyes. A longing? I did not know exactly what but it was all he could see.

"I know I have said this a lot, but you are the sole reason I feel alive, Umbra." He said gently, looking me in the eyes intensely. My heart fluttered in response, happy with his words.

"And you are the sole reason I desire to be alive." I responded. He flinched softly, but that look in his eyes increased tenfold. Suddenly, he stepped away and the look in his eyes vanished without a trace.

"I-I'm pretty tired. I'm sure you are too." He said.

"Yeah a little. However, before we sleep is there any news on the next meeting?" I asked him, desiring to know when I would have to be without him for another full day so I could prepare myself.

"Oh. Undyne said she would confirm with me later, but they are saying next week. Also, starting two days from now I have meetings every other day with Alphys." He answered me. I nodded sharply, my hate for Asgore increasing more and more by the second.

"I can see you planning ways to kill Asgore and Undyne in your eyes." He said with a chuckle. I sighed as I rubbed my temples and attempted to expel Asgore from my mind. But even I was not powerful enough to cleanse the hatred for him completely, even if it was just for the rest of the night.

"Alright. Tomorrow we start practicing and we have a guaranteed two days without the chance of Undyne finding out and murdering me." He told me with a smile.

"Well, she could still find out and _attempt_ to kill us." I reminded him.

"Vicious as always." He said with a chuckle.

"You bet, Sans." I said with a yawn.

"Alright, go to sleep before you pass out on the floor and wake up with your bones out of place." He said with a faux shiver.

I threw a sock at him,

"Forgive me for my transgressions!" He yelled as he dove for his bed. I laughed genuinely as he threw the covers over his body.

"Alright, goodnight Sans." I told him. He poked his head out of the covers and gave me a warm smile,

"Goodnight, Umbra."


	18. Cracking Glass

I awoke excited. Sans, being the magnificent person that he was, found a place for us to practice fighting in. I practically flew out of the little room that was my bed and jumped onto his sleeping form. He made a surprised noise as his eyes flew open. "Wake up you lazy skeleton, we got fighting to do!" I exclaimed excitedly. He groaned and muttered something under his breath but I aggressively removed the covers from on top of him. "Breakfast then we go." I muttered seriously.

"Alright chill you mad-woman." He said somewhat sleepily. I got up from on top of him and let him get up.

Usually, I was never excited for anything. However, for some reason this got my blood pumping. It was like something was awoken in me and was equally rearing to go. I enjoyed the feeling and reveled in its glorious aura it was pulsing throughout me. As I followed Sans out of the room and down to the kitchen I thought I heard something, like something was breathing excitedly behind me, yet when I looked around I saw nothing other than Sans.

I pushed it out of my mind as we arrived in the kitchen and poured ourselves some normal chocolate flavored cereal. Unfortunately, Monsters had a hard time replicating certain tastes due to the lack of ingredients. Chocolate was regrettably among that list. To me, it was a delicacy, as it had no nutritional value and was a waste of resources to spend my limited amount of money on when I lived on the Surface. However, I enjoyed the taste more than anything. The sweetness of milk chocolate flavored bars brought about a certain happiness within me, even though I knew it was just endorphins produced by the delicacy. The Monster version was lackluster in comparison, however, I could not fault them for it.

Sans sighed from his spot on the table. I looked up to see his bowl drained of all milk and somewhat chocolate flavored orbs. He looked down at my own bowl and frowned at what he saw. "You're not going to finish your milk?" He asked me. I looked down at the white liquid and made a disgusted face.

"I don't like milk" I said plainly. Sans started laughing loudly after I finished my explanation, finding my loathing for milk funny.

"You sound like a little kid." He said in-between laughs. I smirked at him and raised an eyebrow,

"You do know I am carrying two knives on me, right?" I asked him sickly sweet. He gave me a look that screamed, _"I know that you are bullshitting me."_

"Ugh fine." I groaned out. "I only _like_ it with chocolate and peanut butter jelly sandwiches. Otherwise, I think the shit tastes horrible." I explained with disgust on my face. Sans snorted and still boasted his shit eating grin, but he didn't say anything else. I sighed and got up to wash my bowl, dumping the horrid liquid down the sink. I picked up the cotton candy scented soap that Papyrus adored so much and began to wash the bowl. I heard footsteps and looked behind me while still washing to see Sans approach with his own bowl. The sink was one of those that had two sides to it, so he just began to wash his own next to me. It was then my heart twinged with an unknown feeling. It pulsed like lightning through my veins and I was somewhat afraid by the foreign feeling. It was overpowered and I was forced to grit my teeth and focus all I could on the white bowl in my hands. Eventually, the feeling went away and I was back to relative peace.

I dried off my hands on the decorative orange towel that, once again, Papyrus adored to no end. After my hands were adequately dry, I looked up to see that Sans had a far-away look in his eyes. I cleared my throat to get his attention. He flinched softly before he returned back to reality. "Oh sorry. Just thinking about what we need to do before we leave." He explained with a calculating look.

"What do you have in mind?" I asked him. I leaned back against the counter and crossed my arms together in the somewhat cold kitchen.

"Well, I am going to have to dull your knives. For, what I hope to be, very obvious reasons." He began with a smirk. I frowned at the mention of my precious utensils becoming useless, but I also abhorred the idea of Sans being cut to ribbons.

"Can't you just make me a bone knife?" I asked him with a raised eyebrow. He shook his head no and put his hands in his pockets.

"No. They are made of my own magic and manifest as my own attacks. They would hurt you when you touch them, however, I can tone down the damage they do to a slight burn. If you were to continuously hold them you would eventually burn the skin off your hands." Sans explained with a serious expression. I nodded in acknowledgement as I forced my displeasure down at the thought of my knives becoming useless, dull knife shaped metal.

"Anything else?" I sighed out.

"Yeah. If for some reason we are unlucky enough to get caught, run to me. I will be unable to teleport us out if the situation becomes too stressful or if one of us gets hurt." He said with hardened eyes. I could see his teeth clench softly and his hands turn to fists in his pockets. I knew of what he thought of and I also felt my teeth grind against each other. Undyne will experience pain beyond her greatest fears. I can't wait for the day I finally get to enact my **revenge.**

I blinked and tore myself from those thoughts. No good, I can't lose control like that.

"Alright, let's get started." I said with a toothy grin, feeling the adrenaline starting to kick in.

"You know the deal." Sans said. He held out his arm and had a warm smile directed towards me. I stepped forward and latched onto the arm. As has become tradition with teleportation, he enveloped me in a tight embrace. His scent washed over me and I strangely felt at peace. Then the horrid feeling of infinite falling came over me. It turned my stomach upside down and nausea overcame me to an indescribable degree. Then it ended abruptly, the falling feeling subsided instantaneously, but I was left with the lingering feeling of nausea. I gritted my teeth and dug my fingers into Sans' jacket, forcing myself to overcome the feeling and not vomit. "You okay?" Sans asked me softly. His breath tickled my ear and I felt thousands of goosebumps erupt over my skin.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I don't think I'll ever get used to that feeling." I responded shakily. He slowly stepped back from the embrace, but he kept his hold on my arms, perhaps to hold me steady. I sent him a small, appreciative smile and took a few deep breaths to stabilize myself. "I'm good." I told Sans as I stepped back from his hold. Sans' smile immediately took on a Cheshire appearance and I knew exactly what was going to happen.

"Don't go falling for me now." He said with a wink. I groaned and flicked him off for the horrid pun, yet that was not all I felt. My stomach flipped once again, but not in a terrible way. I believe the expression people used for this feeling was _"butterfly's in my stomach."_ It wasn't unpleasant, but it was a strange feeling and since I had never felt it before I did not entirely like it. I swallowed the feeling down and lowered my hand from the rude expression it had formed into. Sans was still giggling like a maniac, clearly finding the whole experience humorous. I also found myself sporting a small smile at the hilarity of the situation and I waited a few moments for Sans to calm himself to a reasonable level. He wiped away non-existent tears and held out his hands to me. "Give me your knives, I need to dull them. Will only take a second." He told me. I grimaced and nodded softly and began to walk towards him. I took out my longer knife, gazing at it's beautiful, well cared for sheen. I softly felt the edge and it easily cut into the callous on the tip of my index finger. It rang with a soft ting at my motion as if it was appreciative of my love for it. I smiled and flipped the knife so I held the blade end. Years of practice allowed me to do this without harm to myself as I extended to handle to Sans.

"These are my life-line, my protection, my weapons. They have served me well and have protected me from death multiple times. I trust you not to destroy them, as I have come to love their company and the companionship they provide." I said seriously. Sans nodded in affirmation to me and gently took the handle, like the tool itself was glass. A soft purple light enveloped the blade and surrounded the edge. He handed it back to me, holding the blade said as I did yet it was sloppy and uncared for since the blade was no longer sharp. I flipped my smaller knife with the same precision as I did the longer one and exchanged the knives. The deep purple light was dull, but was noticeable. I moved my finger across the light and noticed it felt like a dull edge of wooded furniture. He then handed me my smaller knife, and the same purple light enveloped it's edge as well. They could still harm someone, but had more damage as a blunt weapon rather than a slashing and piercing weapon. I gazed at them and decided to experiment. I placed my longer knife in my boot and gripped the smaller one as hard as I could on the blade side. All I felt was a mild discomfort. When I released the knife and looked at my hand all I saw was a small red line where I was gripping the blade. No blood, no cuts, it was extremely interesting.

"Couldn't you just place this magic on a weapon in battle?" I asked Sans as I leaned down to get my other knife from my boot.

"No, I would have to be holding it and focusing on it. It takes about ten seconds for it to fully project onto the weapon itself, therefore it would be impractical to attempt to use it." Sans answered. I casually began flipping my knives and throwing them from hand to hand.

"This would of been amazing while I was learning these tricks." I commented.

"Is there any reason in particular you learned these tricks, other than to boast of course?" Sans asked me with a cheeky smile, all the while he was gazing at the tricks I was doing with mild interest.

"You are mostly correct about the boasting thing. I was bored and thought it was kind of cool to do. Other than that, I think being able to switch hands without injuring yourself might be a good thing to learn." I responded.

I quickly thrusted the knife in my right hand next to his neck. If they were sharpened and if he was a human, I would of slashed open his jugular vein. He flinched softly at the motion, but otherwise he didn't move an inch. He slowly glanced to where the knife was, then back to me. I gave him a sickly sweet smile, and I noticed his pupils got even smaller at the gesture. Then, I scratched the knife over his cheek as I backed away from him. Our eyes were locked as I shuffled a good distance away, and at about ten feet I stopped.

I looked him over and noticed nothing off about him. No injuries that I could exploit, no openings I could abuse. The only thing about him was that he held no weapons, which I of course knew he could summon at a moments notice. He was also looking me over, trying to gauge whether he should go on the offensive or defensive, what areas to strike, which ones to leave alone.

At this point, it was simply a game of chess. Which pieces do you move first, which ones do you sacrifice to win the game? Study the opponents weaknesses, their strengths, their intellect and physical prowess. I knew that physically I would best him, simply by looking at our anatomy. Magical beings such as himself were generally weaker physically than humans, however, magic made that advantage almost useless. He could summon projectiles, throw me off using his gravity field, teleportation - to an effect. Although, I was pretty sure he would limit most of his attacks to a reasonable level. I could cut out blasters and his gravity manipulation - to and extent of course. He could just use the gravity to throw me off slightly to give himself an advantage. Simply put, he had too many advantages. The only way I could win is to be defensive until I can get close to him, which would be a task in of itself.

Settled on my plan of attack, I grounded myself and waited for his first move. He too, must have came to the same conclusion because he did not make a move. He did not want to waste the advantage that came with me making the first move. I smirked at him and continued on waiting. I knew that if I made the first move, the chances of me losing shot up to an almost guaranteed level. So we stood there, waiting for one of us to slip up and decide to go ahead with the first attack.

It took nearly five minutes of waiting for him to finally give up on me making the fatal mistake. One step was all he took. So silent, so methodical. It was as if he was trying not to scare away a wild animal. I stood still, keeping my eyes on the upper half of his body. It was then he tensed up, like a coiled spring, ready to pounce. His left arm lifted ever so slightly and I quickly lunged my body to the right. His body disappeared with a pop and reappeared where I was a second ago, his left hand now wielding an ossein sword that was swinging down hard. I turned and used my momentum to swing down my longer knife in my right hand at his shoulder. A shimmer of blue magic appeared and a bone was conjured where my knife was heading. I expertly decided to jab forward with the knife in my left hand towards his ribs. My longer knife cracked through the bone that appeared, but did not go through. However, I managed to cut across his jacket with my left knife. Sans took a sharp intake of breath as the momentum from the smaller knife knocked the breath out of him. He backed up swiftly and summoned three bones towards me. I dodged the first two with ease, however, the third was coming towards me at a rate that I could not dodge. Faced with a choice of either getting hit with the projectile or dropping to the ground, I chose the latter. I dropped as quickly as I could, catching myself on my right arm and tried my best to tumble into a crouched position. However, I felt an unnatural force on my body. It caused me to roll onto the ground on my stomach instead of landing on my feet. All I heard was a rapid approach of footsteps and quickly rolled to the left. His sword landed where my body was and I let out a silent sigh of relief. It was then I noticed that I was in grappling distance of him. I thought through my choices in lightning fast deliberation. _Grapple or move away? I asked myself._ My reflexes answered for me as I threw my larger knife to the side and was on top of him within half a second. He grunted as he hit the cave floor hard. He looked slightly dazed, so I used that chance to jab forward with the smaller knife I still had towards his neck. Recognition hit his eyes and I felt that unnatural force on my right arm, forcing the knife to land against the cave floor to the right of his head. He then grabbed the left side of my shirt and attempted to throw my off that way. I grunted as I fought against the force and tried to attack again with the knife. His left eye lit up blue and I was thrown about two feet to the right. It was only through dozens of hours of mental and physical training that my hand still held on to my knife. I groaned as my head hit the floor hard enough for me to see white for a second. I opened my eyes to see Sans pouncing on top of me, the positions reversed as he jabbed forward with a bone knife in similar size to my own. I moved my head as quickly as I could to the right, but was not quick enough. I felt a slight burning sensation on the side of my cheek where he hit me and I hissed in displeasure. I used all my core strength to lift my upper body up and latch on to his arms to keep them from striking me. Another decision graced my thought processes and my reflexes answered for me.

I headbutted him as hard as I could.

I saw stars and my vision blanked white for a few seconds. I felt liquid come out of my nose and quickly regained my composure. He too was in similar state, groaning in pain. I used this opportunity to throw him off of me. He landed on his knees next to me. I quickly got behind him and tried to do the motion of slitting a throat. His hands caught my right arm. I looped my left arm under his own and attempted to pry his arm away. Slowly but surely his left hand was loosening its hold on my arm. I kept putting as much strength behind the action as possible, groaning and grunting with exertion in-between my fast breaths. I then felt that familiar force on me, however, much weaker than before. It was enough to make me stumble backwards a few steps. I tried to regain my position but was met with the breath getting knocked out of me. I landed to the ground, making the terrible sound of trying to get my breath back. A large femur shaped bone cluttered next to me but dissipated into nothing after landing. Sans got on top of me once again, this time much higher on my stomach. He jabbed downward with a small ossein knife and I reflexively caught his wrist. Another one formed in his other hand and I managed to catch that wrist as well. My muscles screamed in displeasure at the amount of strength I was putting them through. Slowly but surely those knives were coming down to my neck as I struggled to hold them back. I looked up into Sans' eyes and noticed his pinpricks were the smallest I've ever seen them. I then felt the burning sensation on the left side of my neck and saw that the tip of that knife was touching my neck. I hissed and groaned as I tried to put more strength into my arms but could not.

It was then I felt a newfound strength pulse through me and I quickly tore away his arms from my neck. He was caught off guard by my sudden burst of strength and I quickly pushed his torso as hard as I could. He landed on my legs and I only spared a second to look for my knife. I twisted to the right as I saw it and grabbed it. I saw Sans' out of the corner of my eye leaning up and I quickly began to slash forward with my knife. I felt a small prick of the now familiar burning sensation on the right side of my neck as my knife touched the left side of his neck. It was then we stared at each other. Breaths ragged as both of our bodies shook with exertion. As if on the same wavelength we both lowered our weapons. His own dissipated into thin air and mine clattered on the ground next to us.

I then felt my muscles begin to shake tenfold and felt the now heightened pain on my forehead. I groaned in pain as I could no longer hold myself up. Sans quickly grabbed onto my shirt, holding me up as he shifted his body off of mine and to the left of me. He then slowly let me down onto the floor. "You okay?" He asked me in a breathy voice. I grunted out a yes as I relished in the pain throughout my body. Even though I was in a major amount of pain and my muscles felt like they were turning into Moldsmal's. I found myself elated beyond belief. I loved fighting, I loved proving myself to be the better. Yet, that would always get boring, always winning with no chance of losing. What Sans and I just experienced was a draw, and I loved the feeling it gave me. I won, but I also lost. It was a wonderful experience and I relished every emotion it brought. Anger, excitement, happiness, disappointment - it was all amazing.

I looked over to Sans to see a similar mix of emotions and a few that I could not ascertain. He leaned back on his hands and breathed the same ragged breaths that I also experienced.

"Why are... you breathing?" I asked in-between breaths. He gave a breathy chuckle,

"Really? The first thing... you do... is ask a question like that?" He replied in the same manner. I raised a shaky arm and flipped him off. He laughed in an exasperated manner at my rude gesture. "Magical exhaustion... Magic in the air.... Similar to getting more oxygen." He answered simply. I nodded and raised my arms above my head.

We slowly but surely regained our composure. It took a good ten minutes for us to stop breathing heavily. The high from the fight slowly dissipated and I found myself back to my regular mood. However, tension still remained between Sans and I. Not as palpable as it was when we first started the fight, but it was similar to a slight pull. It was slightly disconcerting, as I had no idea why it still existed. However, I was torn from my thoughts as Sans shifted from his sitting position to a standing one. He held out his hand towards me and I stared at it for a few moments. Eventually, what he was doing caught up to my lagging brain and I gripped onto it tightly. I grunted as I was forced up into a shaky standing position. Sans gave a snorty chuckle at my weakened state and I narrowed my eyes at him dangerously. "Don't go falling for me now." He repeated from what felt like days ago. I swung a limp hand at his chest and he caught it easily. A slight tingle ran up my spine as he gripped my wrist, but I bit back the feeling as he let his hold go. "You think you can take a teleportation right now?" He asked me with slight concern.

"I think so." I replied with a raspy voice. Sans nodded and gave me a small smile.

"Yeah, you definitely need water. If you're sure then we can go right now." He told me. I gave a small cough to help ease my voice before I spoke,

"Alright, let's go." I confirmed. He tightened his hold on me and I felt the now familiar disgusting feeling associated with teleportation.

I wobbled softly as we landed in his room. My head was spinning from the over stimulation of teleportation, along with dehydration and exhaustion. I hissed in displeasure and gathered my bearings enough to sit on the bed before I fell down. Sans looked at me with concern and sat down next to me. "Do you want me to go get you some water?" He asked me gently. I nodded as slowly as I could, worried that any sharp movements would cause the dizziness I felt to increase. Suddenly, a soft pop occurred next to me and I saw that Sans was no longer there. About ten seconds later it happened again and I felt weight on the bed. "Here." He said, holding out to me a purple, plastic cup. I latched onto the cup and greedily gulped down the cool water inside. I did pace myself a little, concerned that filling my stomach with water so quickly would cause me to vomit. After I finished and placed the cup down onto a nightstand I looked over to Sans.

"You're a lucky bastard, you don't get to feel like shit after fighting." I said with a smile. He returned a toothy grin and chuckled softly.

"Well, I do have to experience magical exhaustion. Which is similar to normal exhaustion, in terms that my body is going to feel somewhat sore. Although, I can deduce it won't be as bad as what you are going to feel tomorrow." He explained. There was a slight pause between us. Again I felt that familiar pull of tension between us, yet again my reflexes bit down the obtrusive feeling. "You know. I had fun, with that fight. I never thought someone as lazy as me would enjoy unnecessary physical activity, yet there I was. Enjoying every second. Usually, whenever I practice, I'm just looking to end it as fast as possible so I can get home and go to sleep. However, for some reason, you made it enjoyable." Sans explained to me.

I stared at him blankly, unsure of how to respond to that. Of course, I believed everyone had some primal urge in them that loved to fight. To win, to obtain, to control. It is a natural feeling all humans, or sentient beings that have roots in survival, will feel. Yet, I also knew that it was varying between different people. Some enjoyed it more, like me. Some just wished to get by without risking much, somewhat like Sans. Even so, he felt the primal urges that come forth when you are faced with either death or survival.

"I believe it is a natural thing to feel. People just want to survive, some find it more pleasurable to keep feeling those emotions associated with winning, with surviving. Those are the types that usually feel less, or at least, just want to feel alive for at least a little while." I responded. I felt a little somber, confirming that I was one of those people. Sans flinched softly, not expecting to have his deeper emotions and desires to be called into the open. "You are not a bad person for feeling like that Sans. It is simply a consequence of our mental states, of which we have no control over." I explained to him. He was silent for a moment, his brow furrowing and eyes narrowing.

"Yet going out to constantly fight people and potentially kill people is not the correct thing to do." He said.

"Morality is a construct Sans, even I know you know this. We adhere to it simply because we evolved to have empathy, to have complex emotions, and we feel for the people that lose. The universe did not create good or evil. Animals, with the most basic of cognizance, do not adhere to a moral code. Tigers fight other tigers to expand their territory. They kill their own kind to make sure that the individual can survive. So, is the tiger evil for killing another just so they have a better chance to live? Of course not, you would say they are not as sentient, not as empathetic as us. They don't have the choice that we do. Yet, you forget we still cling to the baser emotions and constructs we were given in our inception. We are still animals Sans, we still adhere to primal urges, although much less. I am not saying morality is a bad thing, in most cases it's great. However, some let it completely override certain emotions and actions. Sometimes, it is okay to kill another. Sometimes, it is okay to steal. Sometimes, it is okay to lie. Don't let a construct such as morality kill you because it tells you that something is wrong." I paused in the middle of my tangent. Sans face was still in the same position it took before I started speaking. Narrowed eyes, small frown, furrowed brows. I sighed as I continued, "I don't want you to die because of morality. I don't want it to get in the way of your survival, because if you die because you didn't want to steal some food from a market, or defend yourself with people are out to kill you, I will _never_ forgive you." I finished.

His eyes widened to an almost comical degree. I hardened my stare at him, completely serious in my final statement. His expression softened and he grasped my right hand in his own. It wasn't tight, if anything he was barely holding on. However, I felt reassurance in the gesture. "Umbra... I will do everything in my power to stay here. I will stay alive for you, even if it means going against my own morality. I'm just scared it will change me into something I don't want to be." He told me in a soft whisper. I softened my own expressions and finally returned his grasp on my hand.

"Sans..." I paused, "You are only what you chose to be. Defending yourself and keeping yourself alive are not enough to change you so drastically. Only you can change yourself into something you don't want to be." I clarified for him. He said nothing in return as we stared at each other. Yet again, the tension I felt increased and I felt glass begin to crack under the pressure. Fragile, little glass, much like my own person. I let go of his hand and scooted away slightly, uncomfortable with what I felt. I sighed softly and returned his gaze with a smile. "Sans, going out to murder and hurt people just to feel something is wrong. When I was on the surface I never willingly looked for fights, but sometimes I would attack first against people I knew that would attack me in the future. I gained satisfaction through preventing myself harm. Through winning in the end." I paused as I studied his face. Again it returned to that thinking position that twisted my heart in ways I never felt. "However, I never said I was a good person." I finished with a sad smile.

It is something I knew about myself for a long, long time. I am not a morally benevolent person, nor do I even aspire to be. Is it a flaw? Maybe. It honestly depends on who you ask. Some would describe me as a determined person. Willing to do whatever it takes to protect myself and live. Some would find that admirable, and some would be disgusted by it. I am not blind to my own emotions and mental stability, I know that I am fucked up in more ways than one. I know that I am not the greatest representation of humanity, and I would not go down as someone who would be kind or caring. However, I would go down as someone who lived. And that was good enough for me.

Sans, although fucked up much like myself, has a moral similar to normal society. He doesn't want to cause harm, even if it would benefit him. He still clings to the whims of normalcy and I do not blame him for it. It is comforting to think that society would think you a great person, as someone who is morally upstanding and willing to do the right thing. However, for people like me, I am just simply unattached to such feelings.

Detached, isolated, severed from specific emotions. A consequence of my upbringing and what I had to do to survive. I find such irrational emotions and thoughts, such as morality, to be limiting. However, I do not blame the ones that cling to it like prophecy. Sans clings to it because he is not as unattached as I am and you know what? That's okay.

I studied his face and saw that it was mostly blank, except for one emotion, sadness. He could be sad for multiple reasons, for me, for himself, for the situation we found ourselves in. I felt a slight irritation at the obscurity of his emotions and I wished to know what it was. Simply just so I could find reasons to make it disappear.

"Why are you sad?" I asked him softly. He gave a sad smile in return and looked me in the eyes with a sincerity I had never seen before.

"I just wish things were different. For you, for me. Wouldn't it of been so much better if we weren't forced to become what we are? If you had your parents, if I wasn't forced to be an accomplice in the murder of children...." He trailed off, the sadness in his features increasing tenfold. My reflexes acted on their own and my hand came up to his cheek. He flinched softly at the contact, and even I found myself surprised at the gesture, although internally.

"Sans, those thoughts are fickle. We cannot change the past, at least, not those memories. They are final, they will always be there. Focusing on them, wishing for things to be different.... Those are destructive thoughts. I was in the same situation, wishing so desperately for my mom to be there. Wondering why she was not reading to me, wondering where her familiar smell of book pages would return. I spiraled out of control and all I would do is cry and cry. Eventually I found myself starving, just skin and bones as I refused the orphanages limited food. I knew if I continued on that path I would die before I even got a chance to live. It was then I felt an overpowering emotion, one that overruled anything else. Determination." I explained. Something stirred in me, and I found myself oddly familiar with those words, even though I had never heard them before.

"Determination to live. Determination to keep going and prove the cruel world that surrounded me that they were wrong. I wasn't some urchin that scrounged for food. I wouldn't become someone that begged for life, that took beatings. I would become someone that powered over my cruel captors, that crushed their reality as I overcame their preconceived notions. I was determined to become strong, and that was enough to keep going." I finished.

The sadness still lingered over him, although much weaker than before. Another emotion lit up in his expression. It was acceptance. He accepted my words as truth and I could practically see him destroy what he clung to. What he wished was true instead of reality.

He was letting go of the past.

It was then I heard the glass cracking again. Little punctures in the transparent wall between us. I saw another emotion in his eyes, one I could not identify. I had never seen such a thing, but I could tell it was major. The cracks spread, becoming louder, almost deafening. I quickly got up from the bed, scared what I would find if that glass broke. I hid what I felt behind a mask and smiled gently at Sans.

"I don't know if it is enough, but you will always be a great person in my eyes, Sans." I told him sincerely. He smiled back up at me, however, he remained on the bed.

"It will always be enough, Umbra." He told me in a soft whisper.

Again, I heard the cracks. Much smaller, much quieter. I backed away softly, towards the closet, fearing what would happen if I pushed this conversation further. "Have a nice night, Sans." I told him. He looked slightly concerned by the suddenness of my proclamation of sleep. I figured that would be the case, but I needed to get out of this room and fast.

"Sweet dreams, Umbra." He obliged. I quickly got down and crawled into the little space I called my bed.

I welcomed the darkness inside the enclosed space, the tightness of the room comforted my out of control thoughts. The fraying rope held taut, the cracking of thin, fragile glass. It terrified me because I did not know what it meant, what it entailed. Things that I did not know the result of terrified the living fuck out of me. I hated it so much, not knowing what was going to happen.

I curled into a ball and tightly held my body. Trying vainly to return to control. I held my breath and counted to ten, telling myself to calm down. It worked, at least a little bit. As soon as I said one, my body relaxed and my breathing steadied to a reasonable state. Soon, I just found myself staring where the wall would be if I could see it. I still felt some anxiety over the situation, not liking it in the slightest. However, my body had other plans than focus on my crisis.

_I found myself in a now familiar void like existence. I sighed as I sat down, even though there was no floor. I waited patiently for whatever Determination wanted to grace me with._

_It took about ten minutes for me to hear shuffling and when I looked to my right I saw her sitting down next to me. Her face was blank from any emotion. I waited for her to speak, if that is what she willed. I held my tongue from any questions, too tired from today's experiences to wreak her ire._

_"So, killing is okay in certain circumstances? Yet, these monster's hunt you and would kill you without hesitation. You even said yourself you hurt others before they could hurt you. So why not do it before they have the chance to kill you again?" Her chilling voice questioned me._

_"Well, it is different from singular people wishing to hurt me. Humanity, or at least the version I experienced, did not like me. Yet, most would not harm me. I imagine it is the same here. Plus, they only want to do it because they wish to be free, even though it means the murder of the innocent. I am not saying they are justified, I have done nothing to them. But it is more of a reason than the people up there." I answered her. She remained silent, staring off into the void. I followed her action as she remained silent, staring off into the inky blackness._

_"You are different from him." She stated. I looked at her puzzled, not understanding what she said. Him? As in Sans? Asgore? Someone else entirely?_

_"Him?" I asked her simply._

_"You will learn in time. But I wonder which of you are correct. I will admit that I am confused, I do not understand the complexities of emotions, morality, things as such. Perhaps with you I will understand another side." She answered vaguely. I was also confused, however, I found myself wondering if she was more than just some psycho that wanted me to murder everyone. She then giggled softly, at the end of my thought, as if on queue._

_"Believe it or not Umbra, I actually desire for you to live. Murder, as you call it, is just an expense of that desire." She proclaimed. I reprimanded myself internally for forgetting that she could read my mind. However, I was brought from it by her statement. Of course, I did not believe a word she said. I couldn't after her insane proclamations ever since I fell down here. Even so, it worried me._

_"Why?" I asked her._

_"Again, you will figure it out in due time. Sleep Umbra." She said with finality._

_I felt the world around me cease as I was lulled into the tight grasp of unconsciousness._


	19. Blossoming Rapport

From a welcomed deep slumber I woke with a groan, unappreciative of the early awakening. I opened my heavy eyelids to view the white ceiling with a sleep blurred gaze. I blinked a few times to focus and immediately glanced to where Umbra slept. Last night was a weird experience, to say the least. However, her actions throughout the day was bizarre. She never wanted to be too close for too long, valuing distance whenever we comforted each other in our misfortunes. I once again felt as if I was doing something wrong, or at least, I did not understand why she was doing such things. Of course, the only difference was when we practiced our fighting, to which we were constantly on top of each other and rolling around, trying to get an advantage over the other. Albeit, the situation called for such actions and I am sure any thought of awkward closeness was immediately forgotten through the pandemonium that fighting called for.

As if on queue, I felt the exhaustion that came from yesterdays activities. My body was mostly made of magic, therefore muscle soreness was not a possibility, however, magical exhaustion held some of the same symptoms. Since I am made of magic, overuse will cause fatigue throughout my body as it restored my magic to pristine levels. The exhaustion itself wasn't in specific areas, rather, it was a general feeling throughout my frame. It was a dull, aching sensation that was topped off by a feeling of absence.

I leaned up and felt my body protest against the action, yet powered through it. I groaned quietly, careful to keep my dissatisfaction at a reasonable level to not wake Umbra up. I quickly changed into a more presentable attire, this time resorting to a black shirt as all of my white ones were dirty. However, I found my signature jacket and a pair of my gym shorts and quickly threw them on. I sighed in frustration as I looked for some shoes to wear, yet finding none. My annoyance grew and I finally just held out a hand and lifted everything off the floor into the air. I easily plucked a pair of worn, white tennis shoes from the air and let everything fall to the floor in a muted thump.

As I leaned down to put my shoes on, my mind raced with what this day called for. Alphys was a character to put it bluntly. She was extremely awkward, and had no idea how to carry a conversation, however, she had a thirst for knowledge and was one of the more intelligent Monsters down here. During our first talk, I found myself enjoying the time I spent with her, even if it was awkward to get through. Although, she is far from Umbra, and I would always prefer my time spent with the woman that completely changed my life.

I stared down at my now tied shoes, thinking about how my teachings with Alphys would go. My mind thought back to our previous conversation, how my teachings were mostly generalized and didn't go too in depth. Perhaps today I would go more in depth about the human psyche. However, something else was pulling at my thoughts, a certain phrase and expression that had me infinitely curious.

_"I-I have heard that they are unable to show e-e-empathy." Her nasally voice said._

I went on with my explanation of how they were completely capable of such emotions. While she did nod in affirmation, I saw something else gleam in her beady eyes that I only noticed until now.

Uncertainty.

Now the question was, what was she uncertain about? That humans could actually experience empathy, or was she uncertain of the fact that she was taught that humans were un-loving terrors that deserved to die? Perhaps it is a mixture of both. Either way, it had me curious and I wished to explore it further, albeit carefully.

I got up from the bed and stared at the closet for a few moments. Finding myself increasingly more reluctant to leave by the day. I gritted my teeth and forced myself to look away from the object of my obsession and exited the room to go down to the kitchen. There I found Papyrus, humming away a tune that I did not know as he made breakfast.

"Sup bro." I said, catching his attention.

"AH BROTHER! IT IS WONDERFUL TO SEE YOU UP AT A DECENT TIME!" Papyrus beamed. I gave him a soft smile as I sat down at the kitchen table.

"Yup, gatta go see Alphys today." I told him. A small amount of unease entered his eyes, however, it was overshadowed by happiness.

"IT IS SO NICE OF YOU TO FINALLY MAKE SOME MORE FRIENDS!" Papyrus basically screamed in happiness as he went back to the stove. As he turned away, I frowned softly. Friends with Alphys? It was extremely unlikely that we would be nothing more than work partners, and even then, when everyone found out I was helping Umbra I doubt she will consider me nothing more than an enemy.

It was then I was broken from my thoughts as a plate was set down in front of me. "HERE IS SOME DELICIOUS TOAST I MADE!" Papyrus beamed as he sat down opposite of me. I looked down to see three perfectfully made cinnamon toast. It took me back for a second, as there were no burns on the bread. It was soft, and Papyrus cut off the crust, which I loved that he did. I happily took a bite out of the toast and hummed in joy at the wonderful taste.

"Wow Pap, this is really good." I smiled at him. He let off a brilliant smile, which filled my soul with joy.

"THANK YOU BROTHER!" Papyrus yelled as he began to dig in to his creation. I smiled as I lazily began to eat the rest of the toasts on my plate. It made me happy to see Papyrus improve on his cooking, as he was very adamant about becoming the best cook in the Underground. I always admired growth in Papyrus, even when it was small and seemed insignificant. I remember back when he was just a little kid, first learning puzzles, and couldn't get them right the first few times. He would get this motivation that I could never aspire to get, and he could not stop what he was adamant to do until he got it right. It made me a little jealous at first, that he could get so motivated to do things, while I would look at the same situations and lose motivation quickly. Yet, I quickly grew out of it, and always felt happiness whenever he finally did something he wanted to do.

I finished the last bite of toast and looked up to Papyrus. I was surprised to find him with a solemn expression, instead of his usual happy go lucky look. He looked up to me as well, and his eyes met mine. I grew concerned, seeing him so unhappy with whatever was plaguing his mind. "Whats up bro?" I asked him gently. Papyrus looked away for a second, seemingly embarrassed by his emotions. I gave him a moment to collect himself, because after all these years of staying together - being the best brothers, he knew he could not ignore my prying.

"Why does the human never want to talk? She is so silent and sad..." Papyrus quietly told me. I held back a flinch and merely blinked in response. Shit, I knew that this would happen, now how do I explain it?

"Well, Pap..." I cleared my throat as I fumbled for some words, "She is uh, just the quiet type. She likes you, don't get me wrong, but it might take a while for her to initiate conversations." I explained to him. His eyes shone slightly brighter at the hope of her being more receptive of his conversational advances in the future. However, he still wore a soft frown.

"Why is she like that?" He asked me. I internally groaned at his curiosity, and once again I fell silent searching for an explanation. I didn't want to breach her privacy by telling him the truth, but it was so hard to explain without using her past.

"She had a hard time with other people before falling down. They weren't nice to her, and now she has a hard time trusting others and socializing. She does trust you, but it's hard for her to talk to people. I think the only reason her and I are so close is that we are so similar." I explained once again. I left out as many details as possible, but gave enough for a simple understanding. Papyrus nodded gently in understanding, however, I could still tell he was upset. Not at Umbra, but at the circumstances that led to her being such a way.

I donned a frown and internally cursed the disgusting creatures that haunted her life above ground. Usually, anger was the emotion I experienced the least. It was too much work to get to the point of irrational fury, however I felt the hot passion of my resentment towards those that hurt Umbra increase further and further by the second. Of course, I may be mainly Patience, however, the remnants of Justice still persisted. It was funny, how quickly Justice turned to vengeance. It was a suffocating hatred, like I was drowning in a sea of enmity. Slowly I was losing air, and the waters of rage filled my lungs as they screamed for some form of peace.

I breathed in and out slowly, making the hot fury that resided within me slow from a boil to a soft simmer. It took what seemed like hours for the burn to cool to a manageable level. I finally opened my eyes to see Papyrus staring at me in confusion and with a small amount of fear. It was then I noticed the soft blue emanating from my left eye and a scowled at it. The magic dissipated and I finally found myself calm enough to think straight.

"I'm alright Pap. Just mad about how she lived. It wasn't easy for her, and it wasn't fair." I explained. Papyrus calmed down immensely and was left with a hopeful look.

"W-WELL! YOU ARE DEFINETLY MAKING HER FEEL MUCH BETTER! I CAN SEE HOW HAPPY SHE IS AROUND YOU, BROTHER!" Papyrus said gleefully. He then got up and took both of our plates to the sink. I got up from the chair, and noticed he turned to look at me while washing the dishes. "NOW! DON'T YOU HAVE SOME IMPORTANT ROYAL BUSINESS TO ATTEND TO?!" Papyrus exclaimed with a prideful look on his face. I internally scowled at the reminder that I had to do seemingly important things. It would be so much easier if people could figure out this stuff for themselves but here I was, forced to go outside and do things I did not wish to do. Well, at least Alphys was alright.

I sighed as I climbed the stairs to the second floor and entered my room. I immediately found a sleeping Umbra in my bed, looking as if she was much more comfortable in an actual bed instead of the amalgamation of pillows and sheets in the little cubby she called a bedroom. I found myself softly smiling at her curled from, no sound came from her except the soft release of breath. I once again found my eyes trailing across her body, taking in her feminine form and the lovely curves she had. A small voice in the back of my mind told me to stop staring at her in such a way, that it would only cause problems, that it would make her run from me. However, the little voice was just that... little. My vision clouded over in lust and love, it was then I heard a creaking sound, like wood being strained. I looked over to my left and noticed I had the door frame in a death-hold. I softly scowled as I stepped back quietly and gently closed the door.

I quickly made my way to the bathroom locked the door behind me. I looked down to see a familiar blue glowing appendage and gritted my teeth at the intrusive thing. I ignored it as I shrugged off my clothes and turned the faucet of the shower all the way to the cold side and stepped in. I sucked in air through my teeth at the sudden feeling and closed my eyes at the water fell over me. I could still feel temperatures, however, it could not affect me in any way survival wise. I did find out that I still was affect my cold showers whenever a certain appendage made its appearance. I once again started breathing slowly. In and out... In and out... Eventually, the feelings I felt so strongly before retreated into the deepest recesses of my mind.

I stepped out of the shower and quickly dried off. I threw on my clothes I left lying scattered on the ground and stepped out of the shower. The only sounds I heard was movement in the kitchen and Papyrus' usual humming. I sighed softly in relief that I had not woken Umbra up. I managed to pull up the memory of the door to the Royal Scientist building and teleported out.

* * *

Even though I despised Sans' leaving, his bed provided such a wonderful comfort. I groaned and arched my back in a stretch as I awoke, enjoying the way my joints popped. I opened my eyes and looked around, finding the usual mess of clothes and books scattered amongst the expanse of the room. I sighed as I sat up and proceeded to stretch every part of my body, yawning all the while. I got up and exited the bedroom to find Papyrus on the ground floor basically glued to the television. I rolled my eyes as I heard Mettaton's robotic voice say something about glitter and began making my way to the bathroom.

I gently shut the door and began to undress, when I was appropriately ready to shower I turned the water to a steamy warmth and stepped in. I sighed in satisfaction at the slight burning sensation on my back, already feeling the ache from yesterday slip away. I stood there for a long time, simply enjoying the water and relaxing as much as I was able. I then began to clean myself with the pumpkin scented soap Papyrus had, however, since I lived with two hairless people, shampoo and conditioner was unavailable. I refrained from asking Sans to get the Monster equivalent, as I could do without, but I also did not want to risk suspicion being placed on either one because of them buying an outlandish thing. So, I simply just rubbed at my hair under the water to get sweat and debris out. Of course, it would not shine or be lustrous, but the orphanage never really had cleaning products such as this on hand, and I never felt like such things were necessary to spend what little money I had on.

When I was much younger, I would look at girls with shiny, long hair and be jealous. I would glare at their seemingly glowing hair, and hate how dull and ragged mine would be. However, I quickly outgrew such emotions in favor of ones that would keep me alive. Jealousy was replaced with a cold calculation, one that recognized if someone was a threat or could be exploited. Skinny girls with no strength, with only their long, lustrous hair, could not defend from attacks. They could not defend themselves from someone wanting to steal their purses and the cash they stored within. Therefore, my mindset quickly changed from jealousy to thankfulness. Why should you be jealous of something that was practically gifting you with money?

Of course, that put me in trouble with the law. Many times I would find cops at the Orphanage, asking the mother where I was. I would then be forced to hide on the streets for days at a time, just to make sure I was not caught. They would come to the school as well, trying their damnedest to find me, however, school was not an importance to me, so I played the waiting game for as long as I needed to. This did not work all the time, on an occasion or two I found myself sitting in Juvenile Detention, of course, I got free food, clothing, and shelter, however, I did not have freedom.

I found myself smirking at the concept of freedom. What constitutes as freedom? To be able to go wherever you please? Yet, I always found myself locked in place. Only having a few choices every day to make, and they were always the same as the day before. Do I go to school? Do I try to pickpocket? Do I just stay in the Orphanage and read? These three choices were the only one's I truly had. I could not get a job, I could not sacrifice the shelter the Orphanage provided. Therefore, was I truly free? I always found myself split on if I should of just gotten caught doing crimes and spend my time in jail, I had the basic necessities provided for me. However, for some reason, I found myself running from the cops every time. No matter how lucrative the option was, I dodged and weaved until they gave up. All for this basic concept of "freedom."

I smiled at the irony I found myself in. As I was trapped underground, with seemingly no way to get out. Now I found myself with only two choices. Do I continue living, or do I die? Even then, the freedom of choice does not exist, because why would I ever chose to die?

I turned the knob of the water off and stepped out of the shower. I walked over to the mirror, grabbing a towel on the way, and watched myself as I dried off. Scars littered my body, some faint, some raised and ugly. Most were stab wounds, some were burns. Most girls would lament over such terrible scaring, yet I felt nothing. They were just there, little remarks on my life. I ran a finger-tip against a few on my stomach, feeling the raised flesh. I remembered how a got a few, fighting with teenagers and making mistakes about targets to rob. Some, I could not remember, they either happened too long ago, I suffered head wounds or I was inebriated at the time.

I looked up to my eyes and stared at my face. My hair has grown a bit since Toriel's. She would cut my hair whenever I asked, now the strands came down to the bottom of my neck. I scowled at the length, already thinking of all the ways it could get me killed. My eyes rolled over the counter, trying to find scissors. Of course, the likelihood of scissors in a household of skeletons was next to none, yet I still looked. I let out a quiet growl of irritation as I gave up my search and put on my clothes.

I stepped out of the bathroom, my scalp instantly feeling the temperature difference as my skin was littered with goosebumps. I once again found Papyrus "Oohing" and "Aahing." at Mettaton's show. As I descended the steps Papyrus' head snapped over to me and he gave me a big, bright smile. "AH, UMBRA. DID YOU HAVE A NICE NIGHT?" Papyrus asked.

"It was alright." I answered him. I walked past the TV quickly, trying not to interrupt his show as I made my way to the kitchen.

"THERE IS SOME TOAST ON THE COUNTER!" Papyrus told me from the living room. My stomach comically growled once I spotted the food. I quickly made my way to the plate of delicious toasted bread and ate plenty. In the middle of my feasting I heard the TV turn silent and boisterous footsteps approach the kitchen. I followed Papyrus' movements with my eyes, watching as he sat down opposite of me. The emotion on his face was one of confliction and anxiety. I immediately felt my own anxiety increase, wondering if something happened to Sans.

"I NOTICED THAT YOU SEEM... SAD MOST OF THE TIME." Papyrus started. I cocked my head questioningly, wondering what incited this. I do not remember feeling sad to the point of it being noticeable recently. "SO, I JUST WANTED TO SAY THAT I AM HERE, EVEN THOUGH YOU HAVE SANS! I WOULD LOVE TO BE SOMEONE YOU CAN TALK TO ABOUT THINGS, IF YOU FEEL IT IS NECESSARY! AS I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WHILE A MASTER OF COMBAT AND PUZZLES, IS ALSO A GREAT FRIEND!" Papyrus boldly claimed.

I was... surprised to say the least. It was weird to have someone so boldly claim to help me.

"Um... thanks Papyrus. However, I do not need help now, and I do consider you a friend." I told him. Papyrus practically glowed after my words. He got up from the chair abruptly and looked down towards me.

"YOU'RE WORDS MEAN A LOT, UMBRA. THANK YOU FOR BEING MY FRIEND!" He practically screamed as he turned and walked back to the living room.

I was practically blank until I heard the TV turn back on. I shook myself and began to think about the bizarre encounter I just experienced. What did Papyrus have to gain by saying those things? Self appreciation? Gaining his brother's approval? I did know he has not had a lot of friends, so perhaps he was gaining my favor? Although, I was not adverse to the idea of being friendly to Papyrus, him and I did not have the same connection as Sans and I. Therefore, I was at a loss as to what proclaiming a new friend could mean, especially one that did not have the same experiences and understanding as Sans and I.

I sighed as I got up from the table and washed the plate my toast was on. I turned and headed to the living room and towards the couch.

Apparently, I had a new friend.

* * *

I scowled at the molten air against my bones. My eyes immediately found the buzzer to the laboratory and pressed it harshly. I could hear the sound permeate throughout the facility, however, after waiting for two minutes no one answered the call. I frowned, as with each passing second I could practically feel myself melting if I were a aquatic Monster. I once again pressed the buzzer, expecting someone to open the door within a reasonable amount of time. Yet, I found myself still standing in the disgusting heat for a few more minutes. I let out an agitated sigh as I pictured the area next to the couch I sat on not too long ago.

I felt immediate relief with the clinical, cool air. I looked around, and found Alphys sitting at a desk, wearing a pair of pink headphones that was blaring music. However, with her head leaned back all the way against the office chair and drool leaking out the corner of her mouth, I could see why I was not answered earlier. I walked up to her and tapped her shoulder gently. She hazily moved, murmuring something about Undyne while she rubbed her eyes and yawned. When her eyes lay on me, however, she immediately went into a pandemonium of flailing arms. I watched as her headphones clattered against the tile floor, the music almost deafening even though it was a few feet away. She went for the spacebar, the music silenced and I looked back to her. It was then she went on her spree of apologies, I counted at least twenty-four "sorries." I felt a small smile pull at me and allowed it to form. When she spotted said smile, she calmed down, although only slightly.

"I-I am so t-terribly s-sorry Sans." She muttered quietly as she lifted herself from the chair and picked up the headphones.

"It's no problem." I replied. I couldn't really blame her for staying asleep at this ungodly hour, even though it caused me to experience literal hell outside.

"I-I am n-not used to w-w-waking up this early. I-If I h-had it my way, we w-wouldn't be here at l-least another f-four hours." She said with a small laugh. I felt myself rumble out a chuckle, finding our small similarity warming.

"I'm glad we could agree on something, I hate mornings." I said. I saw her beady eyes widen behind her glasses, although the involuntary twitch of her lips upwards betrayed her happiness with my statement. As sad as it was to think about, I don't believe she had a lot of friend and the best way to figure out if I could move her to my side, was to betray that weakness.

"W-well, would y-you like t-to take a s-seat Sans?" She gestured to the couch. I nodded with a warm smile as I walked over to the couch and leaned back lazily into it. I watched as Alphys rolled the office chair in front of me and sat in it. Her hands rubbed against each other anxiously as silence overtook us.

"I was thinking about talking more of the Human psyche, Alphys." I decided to begin. She darted her head up and nodded in agreement.

And so we began a conversation that lasted hours. I mostly talked, but Alphys would butt in with a question every once in a while. I watched as her nervous ticks went down the longer we talked and the more focused she became. I found myself enjoying the scientific endeavor more and more, loving how I could finally talk to someone that showed at least a small interest in Humans that was not blind murder. Of course, that brought my thoughts back to the uncertainty in her eyes in our last visit. Therefore, I decided to test the waters a small amount.

"Tell me Alphys, what is your opinion of Humans?" I asked nonchalantly. Her eyes widened a comical amount and almost chuckled at the reaction.

"I-I'm not sure h-how to answer t-that." She replied nervously.

"How so? You must of gained some form of opinion throughout our talks?" I asked, pushing her further. She glanced at all the parts of the room that was not me, and it took her a while to answer my question.

"I-I think they are a f-formidable species. T-They have amazing c-creativity and a-are highly i-intuitive." She answered.

At first I was taken aback by her answer. I have come to expect almost all Monsters to say that they are evil creatures that only wish to harm and kill. After my shock, however, I almost smirked with a devious delight. If I could just nurture this small thought, we could actually have a chance. "Thank you for answering, Alphys." I replied simply as I stood from the couch. "However, it is getting late and my brother will be making dinner soon."

"O-Oh of course, I-I would hate t-to keep you." She said as she also stood from her chair. We nodded to each other as I teleported out.

This was starting to get interesting.


End file.
